Saturday, May 21, 2011

Both Ends Baldy: A very special Saturday “Caption This Pic”, sponsored by the Baron Von Goolo Foundation for the National association for the advancement of Cthulhu

And now, a word from our sponsor:

“Luckily, the Make-A-Wish Foundation keeps some quality tail in their Rolodex for just such an occasion”.

# posted by Bagnonymous
7:08 am May, 21 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Douchbag rule #5. Carpet has to match the drapes

7:14 am May, 21 skrag2112 said...

Production still from Jason Shitstain’s new movie ‘Tranny-Spotter 4: Find The Sausage’.

7:15 am May, 21 Mr. Belvadouche said...

a true gent always lets his preggo wife wait for the goose while he lays it down with 3 post grads

7:27 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

Production still from Jason Shat-Ham’s new movie “Tramp-Sporter 5 – Hairless Like A Fetal Pig”.

7:28 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

Barry made the best of his little mix-up with the coffee cream and Nair bottle.

7:32 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

Barry’s body’s as slick as an onion,
And these girl’s holes all smell like Funyuns™;
They’ll all go knock boots,
Cracking Vidalia Poots,
But not with the Blue Bikini gunt one.
.
.
.
.
.
.
sorry

7:57 am May, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

“Knock boots” hahahaha, I was just talking to my friend the other day about how noone says that anymore. I’m thinking about just carrying two little doll boots around in my purse and if I see someone I fancy I’ll point at them and then pull out the doll boots and click them together. And then give one of those “Well, whaddaya say?” Question to the gents on this site: Is that too forward? And should I use real size boots which may be more of a pain to carry around but if it leads to real size sex I might be willing to give it a go.

8:01 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

Jason hated his job as Human Elephant Suppository, but the pay was so damned good.

8:01 am May, 21 Mr. Belvadouche said...

@nancy

Why not just say “fuck me” and pull him outside. That would work 100% of the time. No such thing as too forward…

ps. I wear loafers

8:02 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

Wait…”Knock Boots” is a euphemism for fornication?
.
Great…now my limerick makes absolutely no sense.

8:02 am May, 21 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

Vinbag Diesel (no slap on Vin Douchal, who rocks) borrows three waxies from Madame Tussaud’s for a set shoot…I’m too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt…

8:14 am May, 21 DarkSock said...

@ Mr. Belvadouche:
.
Actually it would only work 93% of the time…

8:47 am May, 21 ehcuodouche said...

Douche: Look girls, I can fit into the same shorts I wore when I was thirteen.

Girl 1: You have just as much pubic hair as back then too.

Girl 2: I bet you last just as long in bed too.

Girl 3: And you still like to go to Sea World and pee in Shamu’s tank.

9:22 am May, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

@Mr. Belvadouche, knocking loafers is out of the question. Thank you for being up front about that before I proceeded any further. And what if I am already outside? Do I pull him inside? Is this all about taking the target to a secondary location?

9:45 am May, 21 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@Nancy
.
The Mrs. just reminded me that when she secured my services for the third and last time she was very forward. I suggest you use her method. Find a guy, tell him you want him back baby and you’ve missed him, shove your hand in his pants and while gently fondling his package ask him to go fuck in the back of his student painting van, the one filled with paint, bras, dirty condoms, and a cooler filled with beer and shame. Son.

9:49 am May, 21 Nancy Dreuche said...

^No offense Rev, but I prefer to take my advice from happily married couples. Again no offense.

9:50 am May, 21 Mr. Belvadouche said...

@nancy

before you dismiss my loafers……have you seen the size of my mustache?

9:57 am May, 21 Et Tu Douche? said...

“a cooler filled with beer and shame” Classic!!!!

11:50 am May, 21 creature said...

Jason Shats-Ham (heh heh) poses outside the ‘Bolt On Emporium’ with the 3 winners from the “I Can Get Dates For You Foundation”

11:52 am May, 21 creature said...

@ nan
I find steel toes pack a wallop to the taint

1:57 pm May, 21 Wedgie said...

GSR faggalah.

2:32 pm May, 21 creature said...

that agent orange is a muthafukkah

6:16 pm May, 21 Medusa Oblongata said...

I need a shower after reading this thread. Or maybe it’s because I spent all day doing Mexican-grade yardwork today. God dayum, I swear I’m gonna grow a pair of balls to match my clit-penis. And in case Cthulu here is ready to eat some souls, I was a lways a believer, so I get to go early. Which is good, ’cause then I won’t have to look at his crustacean concubines anymore.

9:38 pm May, 21 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Three young ladies gather round Ned, intent on rolling their tits on his macadam road of a tum-tum torso.

9:42 pm May, 21 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Three sets of bongo drums and a washboard make for something of an unbalanced quartet, but these days, anything goes.

9:45 pm May, 21 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

By anyone’s definition, everyone is a rounder any more.

12:12 am May, 22 Baron Von Goolo said...

@ Nancy
Have you heard DEVO’s new album? Yes, DEVO has a new album. Track 16 is called “Knock Boots.” It’s coming back, behbeh. Now that that’s taken care of, let’s bring back “sucking face.”
.
And no, do not whip out a pair of prop boots to signal go-time for the sexing. If your man thinks of Carrot Top even for a second, his junk will pull a Goodbye Horses that it may never recover from.

2:17 am May, 22 Steve L. said...

now i understand why the cause of Cthulu needs to be advanced.

6:07 pm May, 22 Medusa Oblongata said...

HP Lovecraft birthday party this August, for those of you in the greater Chicagoland are. Yes, I’m fuccen serious. My sister, the immortal Noomsie Oblongata are hard at work on this. There will be green cake.

6:07 pm May, 22 Medusa Oblongata said...

Area. Derp.

6:08 pm May, 22 Medusa Oblongata said...

Noomsie and I. Jeebus. Where are my Skittles and Rain-X? I can’t think without ’em!

7:21 pm May, 22 Collaz B. Popped said...

Worst GSR Ive seen on this fuccen site.

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