Friday, January 4, 2013

Friday Haiku

555

Look at his girl** and
fellatio handlebars!
**Her name? Lucy Furr.

Tying girls to tracks
is passe; Snidely Whiplash
now uses roofies

– Morbo

Handlebar mustache
Doesn’t distract from baldness
Or doucheness, either

– DoucheyWallnuts

Tell me friend have you
ever danced with the devil
and the pale bald guy?

– Chris Brown Note

She grew bright blue horns
Since the Gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.

– The Reverend Chad Kroeger

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
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# posted by DarkSock
Links n' stuff:
7:14 am January, 4 Morbo said...

“Mustache rides are free!?”
Yes, but it’s a bad bargain
They’ll leave you itchy

7:18 am January, 4 Morbo said...

Tying girls to tracks
is passe; Snidely Whiplash
now uses roofies

7:19 am January, 4 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Simon Le Douchebag
Signals displeasure with pic.
My signal is puke.

7:22 am January, 4 Morbo said...

Hit show “Whisker Wars”
in trouble for Season 2
if this is their plan

7:31 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Handlebar mustache
Doesn’t distract from baldness
Or doucheness, either

7:45 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Leif Garrett is sad
No longer a Teen Idol
Now an Adult Douche

8:16 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Finger in picture
Didn’t cause the look on her face
Finger in ass did

8:17 am January, 4 Ultra Bagnus said...

The Iron Sheik has
raised his game over the years
Duke U cries in shame

8:17 am January, 4 Charles Nelson Douchely said...

Herpster facial hair
Flips society the bird
Rollie Fingers weeps

8:20 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

His mustache smells like
Russian Internet Bride Poon
Roofies and Vodka

8:23 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I rarely say this
A tattoo would be better
Than fucking mustache

8:32 am January, 4 ehcuodouche said...

This site is called Hot
Chicks with Douchebags it isn’t
Pictures from gay bars.

8:35 am January, 4 ehcuodouche said...

Flown in from aught five.
Extremely subtle flip off.
That’s nineteen aught five.

8:35 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

He uses tampons
From her monkey hole to curl
His mustache at night.

8:37 am January, 4 Capt. James T. Douche said...

It might be safer
To switch to beard rides in this
Case that’s not wax there

8:39 am January, 4 Capt. James T. Douche said...

There is nothing more
Threatening than a groomed ‘stache
Flipping you the bird

8:39 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

When will herpsters learn
that being ironic is
considered mainstream.

8:41 am January, 4 Capt. James T. Douche said...

If you think that is
Ridiculous check out the
Payes on his wang

8:42 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

Do not pass go, douche.
Do not collect two hundred
dollars, herpsterbag.

8:43 am January, 4 ehcuodouche said...

Demon Seles has
Herp Largeman check ligatures
Welcome to ’13

8:45 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

Do not drink and drive
your old-timey bicycle
with the huge front wheel.

8:46 am January, 4 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Taking a breather
From the biker bar glory
Hole, ‘stache is crusty

8:46 am January, 4 douchenozzle said...

Electric blue horns
On slinky slavic concubine
Dali hipster fails…
To count beyond
One

8:49 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

Remove the jacket
and the mustache. What is left?
Bald man with herpes.

8:50 am January, 4 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Watson and Holmes are
Hot on the trail of the ‘stache
Of the Baskerville

8:52 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

She’s had that look on
Her face since his finger was
Put in her asshole

8:54 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

She’s the devil with
the goo dress ,goo dress, goo dress
on. Goo equals jizz.

8:54 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Payes on the wang FTW.

8:57 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

He’s such a douchebag
After 26 comments
Her horns are ignored

9:00 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Glowing horns mean that
His left finger hit pay dirt
Pay dirt means her bung

9:03 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

If your mustache does
nothing to hide your double
chin, then what’s the point?

9:07 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

The devil went down
to George’s Salon, looking
for a gay escort.

9:08 am January, 4 Lorenzo Llama said...

Photo snaped moment before
Blue-horn-slav smash
Goose glass into stash

9:13 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

Tell me friend have you
ever danced with the devil
and the pale bald guy?

9:19 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

Blue horns, blue balls, um
horny, blue, blue, balls, I know
there’s a joke somewhere.

9:19 am January, 4 creature said...

like stylish moustache?
got it in crackerjack box
girl from crackerwhore

9:22 am January, 4 creature said...

Russian matador
gores latina hindquarters
with horns on his face

9:23 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This douche is why the
Stones had Sympathy for the
Devil. He’s that foul.

9:25 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

Slack-jawed bleeth can’t close
her mouth til gyroscope is
in her monkeyhole.*
-
* I do not own the rights to the final ten syllables. No infringement intended.

9:27 am January, 4 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Salvador Dali
‘Bag likes to paint with his poop
Horn Bleeth unimpressed

9:27 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

When he asked for her
number she said, “666″.
He never got it.

9:45 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

When he asked for her
number she said, “666″.
He never called her.

10:21 am January, 4 Lorenzo Llama said...

Natasha Bluehornova shocked
When Stash lacked
Cash to pay for Drink

10:24 am January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Chris Brown Note is En Fuego…

10:27 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

Chris Brown Note @ 9:13 FTW

10:28 am January, 4 Lorenzo Llama said...

Stash O’Toole angered
Beard 69 hat made
Natasha hornney

10:43 am January, 4 Lorenzo Llama said...

Douchestash curled with
Gel and desperation
Irritated Russian bride’s Cheek

11:39 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This site goes down more
times than Plinky’s Mom goes down
on Ben AND Jerry.
.

Thanks guys. :) The slipshod mechanics of WordPress fucked with my flow for a bit though.

11:43 am January, 4 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

Statement facial hair
Lost its appeal years ago
To all but trannies

11:44 am January, 4 creature said...

leather stache is gold
at TJ wanna hump bar
score demon tranny

11:50 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

When bored, Phineus
plays horse shoes with his moustache
and last night’s cock rings.

11:51 am January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

Meanwhile, a leather
Daddy barbershop quartet
is now a trio.

11:52 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

It may look bizarre,
but moustache can double as
bottle opener.

11:54 am January, 4 Douche Wayne said...

Mustachioed. There.
I just wanted to use the
word Mustachioed.

11:57 am January, 4 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

How do I get my
mustache curls to stay, you ask?
Use Ass wax daily

11:58 am January, 4 Vin Douchal said...

Dispeptic Alto
From gay barbershop quartet
Voice lube: beer and jizz

12:00 pm January, 4 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

As his mom asked him
Where is that nice girl Tammy
Finger and Surprise

12:00 pm January, 4 Vin Douchal said...

6th Village Person
To modernize the band’s look
Bad ‘tude barista

12:03 pm January, 4 Vin Douchal said...

Stoned and drunk cue ball
Thinks his olde thyme-y mustache
Hides mommy issues

12:04 pm January, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Ass he quickly pulled
The anal beads from her ass
His magic was proofed.

12:06 pm January, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The back of his head says,
“My other girlfiend is
A unicycle.”

12:08 pm January, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Heineken? That’s for
Pussies. He’s opening a
Pabst in her Tar Hole.

12:09 pm January, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Et Tu. meet a MILF.
MILF, I had no idea he
Was a hipsterbag.

12:10 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This is the face of
a douche who sold his soul patch
to a deviled egg.

12:12 pm January, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She grew bright blue horns
Since the Gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.

12:21 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

“What kind of devil
are you?”-Him “Dirt.” She replied.
“I’ll suck anything.”

12:33 pm January, 4 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Is it just me or
Was the site not working till
This afternoon? Son.

12:36 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

Bald Vs. Evil
Who will emerge the victor
in this losing game?

12:40 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This site goes down more
than RevChad goes down on his
cousins and uncle.

1:00 pm January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

For some reason, I
Would still bang her even though
She’s with this douchebag

1:04 pm January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Site was not working
Goes down more than Bieber
Does on his boyfriend

1:20 pm January, 4 SonnyChibaChoad said...

Hott with Neon Horns
Tony Levin plays the Stick
Nappy Dugout Queef

1:28 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

All ladies should go
down on their fellas as much
as this site goes down.

1:29 pm January, 4 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The sites not working
Since the handlebar mustache
Was put on home page

1:30 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

If this site goes down
without cupping your balls ask
for your money back.

1:32 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This site hasn’t worked
smoothly since DarkSock stopped
pissing in horses.

1:39 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

If DB1s show
on TV ran like his site…..
Oh. I get it now.

1:44 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This site hasn’t run
smoothly since Medusa left
Frank Mercurio.

1:48 pm January, 4 Chris Brown Note said...

This site hasn’t been
the same since FLYTEETH left and
took all the TARMAL.

5:05 pm January, 4 Dr. Eve Summers said...

Of all the doucheyiest trends as of late, the douchestash is the scariest. It is the great equalizer. At one point, one had to be devoted to the lifestyle, have social support in the form of welfare and a room in their parents basement, and posses the genetic capability of awe inspiring feats of doucheness. For example, it takes a phenomenal amount of pigment and a beach towel, all just to get that deep bronze under a New Jersey sun. And that dirty jersey bronze is only one requirement among many to live a true douche existence: Ed Hardy t-shirts, nerves of steel to rob a liquor store to “pregame,” gym membership, access to a used M series German luxury car. The list is endless. Oh but the douchstash can be grown by most swinging dicks over 18, and it is even possible to keep a job as a cop, gaypornstar, or relief pitcher while growing it. It is my prediction that the douchstash will do to douchbagery what HDH did to baseball. Please recall striped shirt mustache douche from a few weeks ago. These two mustaches are like the first few raindrops to fall on the streets of New Jersey before Sandy. The heprster virus is far more deadly because it is easily spread. The Guido is merely a benign form of rectal cancer afflicting mainly people of a Southern European origin. The Herpster virus has the makings of a pandemic. It will spread. Only the facially folically challenged are safe.

6:14 pm January, 4 Macsorley McScrote said...

The Monopoly Man loses
His monocle and
Colors his ‘stache

8:49 am January, 5 JustMC said...

Horny neon hott
Finds Tobias offputting
He’s a nevernude

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