HCwDB at the Guggenheim

    Thursday, October 31, 2013

    12 Years a Douchebag

    photo 3 (3)

    Sometimes we as a society need to confront the ugly truth about America’s douchey past.

    By facing the horrible realities of our buried legacy of country music, patriotic leg warmers, and kitten shirts.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, March 26, 2013

    “Love and Body Spray”

    535504_535658513121104_2086740886_n

    I hereby deem thee an artistic amalgam of all that is smelly in greater Long Island, and hereby bequeath this image to my show at the Guggenheim in 2023.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Friday, February 15, 2013

    Friday Haiku

    FridayHaiku Why did Mickey Mouse
    Divorce Minnie Mouse? Because she
    Was f*cking Goofy.

    Ugh.  Let’s try another:

    The two most hated
    Kinds of deviants on earth:
    Furries and Douchebags

    Senile old man drives
    his Delta Eighty-Eight on
    sidewalk, problem solved.

    – UFO Destroyers

     

    She won’t do Pluto
    Since the gyroscope was put
    In her Mickey Hole.

    – The Reverend Chad Kroeger

    Ridiculous hat
    huge, oversized, clowny shoes
    Mice look stupid, too.

    – Douche Wayne

    Slip blonde a Mickey
    Benzino misses the point
    His “mini” thwarted

    – Et Tu Douche?

    Vermin and Varmints
    Roam the streets of Las Vegas
    Where is Carl Spackler?

    – DoucheyWallnuts

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    # posted by DarkSock
    Friday, December 21, 2012

    HCwDB at the Guggenheim in 2023

    HaloofAvalonGuggenheim

    As many of you know, HCwDB’s crucial role in transforming understandings of art by reclaiming the image through a self-reflexive, post-postmodern rubric will eventually be acknowledged by the academic and literary canon. This will culminate with a triumphant art show at the Guggenheim Museum in 2023.

    As a result, I am preparing my yearly collections well in advance of this milestone in post-classical digital art.

    By naming each piece of reclaimed imagery as art, I am codifying the destabilization of the signifier in the age of digital reclamation.

    Of mechanical reproduction.

    Of poo.

    Along with July’s “The Halo of Avalon,” my notable artistic works from 2012 include:

    “Sheen Face”

    “Shminky and the Boob”

    “Ganja Crotch”

    Desert Strangle Strange”

    “Innocent and Poo Face”

    “Nematode”

    “Friendly Gathering on a Humid Afternoon Plus Four Prong” (a work co-created with Hermit)

    “Jack Smellington and His Korner Kameleons” (co-created with DarkSock)

    And of course, one of the most significant works of my career, “Uberbro Meltdown and Pear”

    Someday the academy will concede my genius. Until then, I’ll go on scratching myself.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, October 4, 2012

    Trash Culture as Pop-Art: “Shminky and the Boob”

    It’s s sort of the HCwDB equivalent of a Jeff Koons sculpture.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, September 18, 2012

    One Word Tuesday

    Nematode.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Friday, September 7, 2012

    Friday Haiku

    Kandi Kane enjoys
    Her new ‘bag stereo:
    In Douche 2.0

    This situation
    Has ruined any hope of
    Legalization

    – Capt. James T. Douche

    Even Jane Goodall
    couldn’t wrap her mind around
    this social construct.

    – Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche

    The Clit/Hemp combo
    Is not enough to rouse twins
    Out of drug stupor

    – DoucheyWallnuts

    She has stopped breathing
    Since the gyroscope was put
    In her Chronic Hole.

    – The Reverend Chad Kroeger

    Pot leaf on her cooch
    bondage tape on her nipples
    Bad choices ev’rywhere.

    – Morbo

    “After you bang me
    Leave your hats on this here shelf.
    These are from today.”

    – DoucheyWallnuts

    Everything they wear,
    think, speak is branded. Faces
    need branding iron.

    – Wheezer

    Hooker on the floor
    Ping ping balls fired from biznatch
    Might be injuries

    – Vin Douchal

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    # posted by DarkSock
    Tuesday, August 7, 2012

    One Word Tuesday

    Swolle.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, July 25, 2012

    “The Halo of Avalon”

    I proclaim this one of my greatest artworks of 2012, and title thee, “The Halo of Avalon.”

    My innovative work breaking down the hierarchy of taste culture by using found footage to offer a neo-expressionist critique of medium will continue to revolutionize conceptual critical perspectives on boobies and poo.

    I leave the specifities of critical inquiry into the aesthete of the pic to the comments threads. But know that it is, in both formal properties and conceptual thematics, a ground breaking work, and one I will proudly include at my Guggenheim show in 2023.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, July 10, 2012

    Boobs n’ Boobs

    As postmodern collision montage gave way to ironic representationalism in the early aughts, a Banksian sense of play returned under a more generalized Rauch-inspired urban political critique. This formalism, giving way to expressionist renderings of interiority, took the form of spectacle rooted in street art class-style exhibitionist critique.

    We see an equivalent with post-Gehry architecture, and certainly with boobsy mcboosal boobs. For once a diacritic sense of formalism returned, at least in a Derridean deconstructionist sense, then dudes holding rubber boobs became art followed shortly thereafter.

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    # posted by douchebag1
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