Putz

    Monday, February 3, 2014

    Melvin and Kate Were Bored by The Superbowl

    unnamed (26)

    On the douchey side, Melvin’s stupidface rivals the Manning Face.

    On the hott side, Kate is all sorts of sweet whimsy wasting her affections on a total tool.

    In other news, the death of Philip Seymour Hoffman is relentlessly depressing and pointless, while the revival of the Woody Allen nonsense suggests a nation with too much time on our hands.

    F@ck it, Dude. Lets go bowling.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, January 30, 2014

    Lester Bothers His Sister’s Best Friend Kimberly

    DB4018

    Lester was not invited to his sister’s pre-med study pizza party.

    But Lester done rolled up his sleeves.

    And Lester gon’ leave his mark.

    And by mark, I mean awkward falsetto queries of “what’s your major?” followed by a steadfast refusal to fix the blinds no matter how many times Kimberly points at them.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Monday, January 27, 2014

    Doug Gets Crazy With Paola In Brazil

    unnamed (20)

    Is this the one where Doug winds up with a missing kidney or the one where Prince Harry fondles a Nazi real doll?

    I always get my urban legends confused.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, December 18, 2013

    James Franco Plays a Douchebag in a Movie, Lobbies for an Academy Award

    safe_image
    The circle of self-reflexive performance art douchebaggery is almost complete.

    Hollywood lightweight James Franco is doing his best to lobby for an Academy Award nomination for playing longtime HCwDB nemesis Riff Raff in a movie directed by that kid who wrote Kids.

    A movie so beholden to douche mock, it even featured cameos by the douche twins from Atlanta whose name on the site I have blocked from my conscience.

    I ranted on this once already, so I will spare you my anti-bromides a second time.

    Howver, ironic douchebaggery as performance based on ironic douchebaggery as lifestyle continues to perform the paradoxical stais of life in our funhouse hall of mirrors post-spectacle intertextual media landscape.

    Or, to put it even more succinctly, Menomena.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, December 12, 2013

    Flashback: The Jerz in 2006

    Flashback 2006

    Ah yes.

    2006.

    When hottie/douchey cohabit was in its purest state of cluelessness and HCwDB was just ramping up.

    I recall the days of tracksuits and hair crust fondly. Like a pimple on my nethers.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Monday, December 9, 2013

    Donkey Douche: Still Tryin’ to Scratch that itch

    b

    DarkSock here, whilst The Boss is skeet-skeeting acrost us in the friendly skies above, noting that famed douche lightning rod Donkey D is trying to figure out how many fingers it will take to scratch this poison ivy rash he’s come across. Or hopes to, later.

    Your comments, as always, are appreciated. Son.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by DarkSock
    Wednesday, November 27, 2013

    The Suburban Hustler

    1170786_10153195171340029_503636899_n

    70 Degree Hat Tilt is all Kevin needs the ladies to know about how cray cray he is.

    Sexy Minka’s plunging neckline plays lutes in a harmonic key.

    Meanwhile, your humble narrator flicks lint on the floor and grumbles about the familial responsibilities of a combo Thanksgiving/Hannukah. It’s like exponential dysfunction. Served with cranberry sauce.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, November 26, 2013

    Conservative Bob Cuts Loose on a Tuesday

    it's still just wrong

    Because we all need to indulge our fetishes sooner or later.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, November 21, 2013

    JB Sings Limp Bizkit Covers at Karaoke Tuesday

    2c2691ac311e11e28c261231381055af_7

    Chiquita Vanessa, a quality selection of quality suckle bobble, is unamused by JB’s choice of life-preserver wearing antics.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
    Monday, November 18, 2013

    Riddle Me This!…

    gdf

    What has red hair, looks like the 1980s coughed up a hair metal ball, and hangs with Elvira’s less famous cousin, Dwarfvira?

    Tune in next week!

    Same butt time!…

    Same butt channel!…

    Butt.

    Instead of bat.

    You get it.

    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars
    Loading ... Loading ...
    # posted by douchebag1
Older Posts