tattbaggery
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Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Heavy is the Douche That Tatts the Crown
But he is not a King yet.
And before you claim that memorial tatts should be respected, let me remind you that I have buried many a beloved alpaca out by the water vapor farms, and yet I have memorialized none of them in tattoo form.
None that is, except for Shminkles.
For Shminkles was the cutest alpaca of all.
Thursday, January 26, 2012Name Tommy’s Shoulder Tatt
My money is on Early 90s Bar Mitzvah D.J. Paul Rudd.
This calls for Attitudinal Tiny Dancer Maria Bikini Pics for solace.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012Buckles Jones and Miriam Von Bleeth Are a Vortex of Culture Suck
Okay okay, before the “I thought this site was called HOT CHICKS with douchebags?” comments start appearing, chillax.
This pic was too douchey not to mock. I mean fer chrissakes, if some corner of the internet doesn’t mock this steaming collection of Jerry Springer Bowel Movement, then I don’t know what.
If you need a slice of hott, enjoy some Champagne Katie Underwear POV. And then stop yer bitchin’.
Thursday, January 5, 2012Lobe Runner
Lobe Runner.
Bleething 18-20 Year old giggle continuing-ed coeds throughout the Greater Philadelphia suburbs with awful tattoos since December of 2011.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012Mitch Would Like You to Check Out His Demo, Yo
But not right now.
Mitch be throwin’ major game at his sister Tonya’s sorority bestie exchange student from Morocco, Pilar.
Pilar had never seen neck tatts back in Rabat. She finds them giggly and exciting. Like a Conquistador discovering Mayan gold upon shipreck in the southern moors, she chooses the wrong path, and the Gods do not approve.
Friday, December 2, 2011Fisthole
Beware. The. Fist.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011“Bring me the Butt of Frieda Garcia!”
For it is glorious.
Who’s Frieda? She’s my secretary. Who am I? The guy chomping on Frieda’s butt globbs.
Andy Swirlwind has the aesthetics of a rotting mango, and should be mocked accordingly. If Frieda’s butt globbs hadn’t drawn my attentions, he would, and should, be mocked further for being a heaping urberdouche.
Monday, November 14, 2011Dusty Tells the Ancient Sumerian Aliens Where to Land on his Shoulders
Or, as M. Night Shyamalan once called them, “Crap Circles.”
Mindy perfects flexible back arch that inspires men to take yoga classes and pretend they’ve read Deepak Chopra.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011Chest-Pec Wingtatts: The New Black
Coming in 2013: Chest-Pec Wingtatt Removal Surgery: The New Black.
Asian Melons, however, will always be in season.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011Spiderpud: Turn off the Crotch
Man, these Broadway musicals are just getting weirder and weirder.














