Vegas

    Tuesday, January 7, 2014

    Captain Rehab Says, “It’s Cold Out Where You Are, But Not in Vegas!”

    ImNotGoingToRehab

    For those of you suffering in ridic cold today, let it bring you solace to know that Captain Rehab is scoring at 60% among the greater Las Vegas skankhott population.

    Yeah, I guess that didn’t really bring you any solace.

    Okay, how about some StreetPear?

    See now? It’s not so bad.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, December 26, 2013

    Asian David Arquette Zeroes in on Perky Camille

    unnamed (29)

    Asian David Arquette does not stop until Asian David Arquette is ready to stop.

    Perky Camille offers the glorious glories of all that is holy and reverent in a land in which carnality trumps culture. She is my pincushion cherubic fantasy. Although, while she ranks highly on the human scale, she’s no Fluffy.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, December 17, 2013

    John Largeman Gets His Christmas On

    large (3)

    At the beginning of the evening, John Largeman had five nieces.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, December 3, 2013

    Legs n’ Faux

    unnamed (7)

    Wasn’t “Legsnfaux” one of the Gelflings in The Dark Crystal?

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, November 13, 2013

    Adventures in Las Vegas on a Tuesday

    caption this pic

    It’s like watching a soulless ritual performed by numbed zombies in tribute to a god that never was.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, November 7, 2013

    A Greasepitzer Cuddles With Perfect Eve

    EVE

    If ever you indulged the thought that hottie/douchey cohabit was fading as we enter the teenage years of this new century, banish that conceit from your pretty little head.

    Because professional Vegas Douchclownsians are greasing the suckle bobble pokes. Lo, a Greasepitzer is cuddling somewhere with Perfect Eve.

    Eve’s ful lips and sultry Mayan Eye of Coitus offer harpsichord Beethoven sex music run through stereophonic musak elevator to butt fondle.

    Okay. So that last sentence got away from me.

    But regardless, Ganesh and Vishnu rend their garments and spittle on a Torah at this evidence of wrong.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Monday, October 28, 2013

    Vegas Is Filled with Douchefluff

    when the amish go douche

    Stop the presses. Wait, what? Who dat say what?

    I’m in Vegas.

    And everyone looks like these two.

    Amish faux punk doucheclowns and stripper hotts who smell like glitter, cheap hand sanitizer, and wet tobacco.

    ‘Tis true. Your humb narrs has chosen to return to the land of douche mecca that I first came to, so long ago, with notebook (and camera) in hand in the dark days of 2006. Back when I first began to document the emerging hottie/douchey plague.

    And now I return, seven years later, to see from whenst the scrotal/hott cohabit has mutated, grown, shrunk, or otherwise stank up the strip.

    HC1 and I dropped off the poop machine with the grandma and hit the road.

    Vegas, baby.

    I’m talking Swingers Vegas.

    Not Hard Rock Douche Mecca Vegas.

    The battle continues. HC1 and I will be mocking.

    From a safe distance, of course.

    EDIT: Good news from the front lines

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, October 16, 2013

    Asian David Arquette Parties Like A Rock Star

    AsianDavidArquette

    There’s David Arquette.

    And then there’s Asian David Arquette.

    And somewhere in the middle, there’s a cinnabon.

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, October 2, 2013

    For My Next Trick…

    WheresTheJoker

    Was… this your pear card?

    Douchey Magic!!

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    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, October 2, 2013

    MC Generipud Has No Time For Pear

    how can you ignore the pear

    For MC Generipud has work to do.

    He must press the “play” button on a big stereo system with a play button.

    And then wave his arms. Like he just don’t care.

    And make $30,000 a gig.

    Because Generation Stupid thinks pushing play is like a concert, yo. Especially if there’s Pear.

    Too bitter for a Wednesday morning?

    Well we can always laugh at this guy.

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    # posted by douchebag1
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