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Monday, February 28, 2005
Sexy Sadie with Two Dim Shadies
Oh Sexie Sadie…caught between the poles (literally) of Perma-Lose and WallStreet Douche…can you blame your Sicilian Carnivore WingGirl from walking away in disgust/self-loathing jealousy? We too are jealous…O that alibaster Elvira skin…
Posts have been sparse in this wormhole into 2005…Spinal Meningitis is calming down and the Socklets will soon ship back to the Present Ex-Mrs. Sock so salad days will soon return. Until then…here’s a pair o’ pears.
Just hang in there as I make the necessary adjustments.
Sunday, February 27, 2005Friday Haiku
“Seems like a nice guy”
Thought Jill. But his Hyundai’s trunk
Has plastic sheeting.
Dented cranium
Is the new Botox. Forehead
Becomes a Fivehead
Love child, Mike Tyson
and the Jocelyn Wildenstein
With a strong gay vibe
Varsity Jacket.
With trophy wife. The DeVry
reunion kicks off!
Plastic Bleeth awards
Prize for “Eyes Closest To Center
Of Head.” Award night.
Smooth complexion,
with luscious lips and sexy gaze.
The girl is cute too.
Tyson’s son laments
his empty trust fund account
Jill goes back to work
Where did the top of
His head go? Oh wait it was
Used to fill her tits.
Dextor will always
be sensitive ’bout salad
tong marks from his birth.
Cheek implants, bolt-on
boobs, bottle blond, capped teeth.
Bad taste in men, real deal.
Her first date with Carl:
Dined on mustard and biscuits,
Then killed with sling-blade
Ted Danson sequel
“Three Boobs and Gorilla Mask”
won’t win box office.
It puts the forehead
In the basket, or it gets
The hose. The Goolo hose.
Lobotomy scars
Are the new tattoos in Vegas
She gets hers this night
Saturday, February 26, 2005
Friday Haiku 4 Hatters, Yo
Tina Tanned Tatas
Mocks YOU, the Hatters. Lo! Hark!
What have you to say?
FratDouche Billy Bob
With His Glow-Worm™ Belt Dildo™
Leads her from the Club.
Nancy, sofa-sized,
Smirks from her sofa at us –
Our perceived demise.
Do you go gently
Into that poo-orange night,
Or rage a’gin it?
Esteemed Gentlemen
(and the Reverend Chad Kroeger)
I pee in that horse.
The Reverend Chad Kroeger said…
She stopped eating horse
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Donkey Hole.
hermit said…
Horse meat ain’t all bad
a delicacy in France
and at Taco Bell
DoucheyWallnuts said…
Neckbeard in background
Happy he’s not with these two
Talks to potted plant
Capt. James T. Douche said…
She looks likes she earns
A living queefing into
Bags she sells online
** ^WTF? I dig it though. -D.S.**
Vin Douchal said…
Machmoud Al-Largeman
Planted ass bomb in men’s room
Slinks back to losers
DoucheyWallnuts said…
The Rhinoplasty
Improved her face a little
So did the fake tits
Groupon…you’re doing it wrong.*
*Belated Haiku front-pagers posted.
fRIDAY HAIKU
Joo dare look at Bro?
Joo suffer d’ Roundhouse keek
From deez roho pants!
TongueHolio leers.
Like a persistent Sleestak,
he appears – again.
A man looks into
The abyss long enough, he
Turns into Joo Bro.
Donkey Douche’s little
bro Ferret Douche. Half the size,
still a full-on tool.
Roho’s anger rises
as he is unable to
raise Roho Jr.
How big’s the Snapper
On a little person Bleeth?
This guy will find out
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Ironic Hipster Beard Goes for the JUGGGular
Perhaps HipsterDouche Stinkle Von NeckBeard macking on Boob-a-licious Betty (possible cousin to Francine?), may be less pressing than, oh, say, his need of a shower. What say you…Nottadouche and go do some body-wash? Or is the Rob Halford Ironically Worn Metal Hat in combo with the Grizzly Adams throw-back veneer simply too much?
Hold forth, as e’er, in the comments section.
I shall have belated last-week Haiku front-pagers up soon. SOns.
Monday, February 21, 2005Monday Thought and Link
Behold, Ye faithful…Lo tho I’ve been battling the spinal meningitis and what not I have perhaps found The Holy Grail…could this be…The Face of Fenny Argentina, aka AssPear LaPlante?***
Hold forth your deliberations and predilections in yonder Comments Section. Sons.
***Note: You may need to gaze upon this image for 4 hours or more before you actually see a face.
Sunday, February 20, 2005Friday Haiku – Thursday 4th o’ July Edition. SOn.
Well, the 2005 time machine posts have been a bit spotty. Spinal meningitis got me down. But we’ll get this boat back up on plane after the 4th f’shizzle.
In the meantime just lookit the bumper on Kitty, wouldya?
********
O Feline Princess
How I pine to put litter
All up in your box…
Friday Haiku
The I.T. Gangsta
Can unjam your copier,
Install Windows. Yo.
Greenie Weenie needs guidance counseling
Behold the now-former co-worker of one of our un-named regs. Due to unspecified TomDouchery he now finds himself unemployed.
Rather than mock this pour soul I figured you guys could suggest a new career path befitting his…um…skillset.
Or mercilessly mock the mofo.
Why not both!
