Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Kisseus Vomitorious Wants to Pump You in the Hanficapped Stall

564956_465257780164350_207721522_nThe Vomitorious himself writes in to deny accusations of high percentage bodyfat:

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KV Here,

Took about 3 weeks I was on a straight no gym clubbing only plan. Bench pressing bitches. Curling girls and squating skanks. Running my mouth and sex for cardio. Haters gonna hate. Calvin bangin gonna bang. You mad bras? It’s f@#king shredding season get off the computer and meet me in the club where we will do pushups to pump up together in the hanficapped stall and hit the dance floor!

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I used to occasionally squat skanks after eating Indian food. I find that an extra glass of water before you go to bed can help.

# posted by douchebag1
11:04 am February, 13 Vin Douchal said...

Yet another reason to stay in school , kids

11:13 am February, 13 Magnum Douche P. I. said...

“Pump up together in the handicapped stall” ???????? Ya know, I for one an going to take a pass on that offer. But the rest of you HCWDB haters feel free to accept.

11:13 am February, 13 Bag Margera said...

I’m trying to move my browser to the left side so i can cut off the Vomit. Its just her now, leaning on top of a sack of painted taints, wearing designer hobo pants. Good enough for fapping.

11:25 am February, 13 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Maybe I’m just not lifting the right kind of weights but I’m just not into calling women bitches and skanks. Or maybe it’s that I take some of the engery that guys like KV tend to put into themselves, and instead send it towards the ladies, which I most certainly appreciate for who and what they are.

.

Haters gotta hate, that’s true, but misogynist aesthetic narcissists gotta do push ups to trap and tap the ladies with low self esteem and high implants while wasting time taking AND POSTING pics of themselves in the mirror.

.

P.S., looks like your roommate got sick of you leaving Cheeto smear on the controllers and took his PS3 into his room. Sorry, bro. You jelly?

11:27 am February, 13 THEONETRUEDOUCHE said...

Excuses- he got fat-Hopefully whatever virus he catches formthe bathroom floor renders him sterile.

11:31 am February, 13 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

http://www.popsci.com/science/article/2013-02/14-minutes-disaster

.

Maybe if we all lean westward a little bit over the next few days, we can slow down enough to make this collision thing finally happen. It feels like it’s about 5am in societal terms, and long past time we all just went to bed.

11:35 am February, 13 Dickie Fingers said...

You got that plump in 3 weeks?

11:41 am February, 13 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

No. No. No. No. DB1, do not let this be another Stackhouse posting his contrived schtick for the narcissistic thrill of being the center of negative attention for a few moments. Just delete him. And I demand to know the address of any porn clips this hott has been in. You know she has at least one..

11:48 am February, 13 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Yea, thats cool and all getting pumped in the handicapped stall and what not we know you need the protein, but when is the last time you paid your rent on time, had a car that didn’t look like rusted Swiss cheese and backfire with every key turn or a job where you couldn’t show up in sleeveless shirts? It’s gonna dry up soon, you’ll be brushing Just For Men into that hawk and struggling to keep your man tits from pointing down!

12:01 pm February, 13 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Forgot to mention in my last hatin post that KV’s narcissistic incoherent ramblings make Stackhouse seem like a pretty smart guy. And that is an acccomplishment. Pump away bro !

12:16 pm February, 13 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Yes. We have another Stackhouse Zyyz fan thing starting here and I’m all for it cause the working as The Man and being sober is bringing me down. I’m getting used to all these devices that talk to each other though.

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Sobs and goes back into his cell to grab some more Nyquil.

12:24 pm February, 13 creature said...

I finally face fucked a fleet footed flea free ferret ferociously frantic & flaccid for freaky fun

…oops wrong blog

.

wordsmiths

12:28 pm February, 13 DarkSock said...

Squaters gonna Squate.

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mouth breathers.

1:16 pm February, 13 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

This is all well and good, but I’m particularly worried about where all the handicapped people are going to pee while this is going on. If they pee on the floor and someone slips and falls, there is going to be a lawsuit for sure.

1:45 pm February, 13 creature said...

irony=handicapped toilet stall at a dance club

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tangos

2:46 pm February, 13 I R A Darth Aggie said...

I’d hit that.

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With a dump truck.

2:56 pm February, 13 Et Tu Douche? said...

Dearest Calvin,

I’ve too have been feeling a little bloated lately and it wasn’t until I realized that “Shredding” season was here that I started to feel a sense of hope and decided to get back into club hopping shape. I’ll gladly take you up on your offer to “do pushups to pump up together in the hanficapped stall and hit the dance floor!”. First though what is a “hanficapped stall” also is doing “pushups to pump up together” code for doing Coke? It makes sense as that stuff and lack of appetite works well for shredding plus the added bonus of gesticulating whilst all tweaked up on the dance floor is like icing on the cake.

2:59 pm February, 13 DarkSock said...

Boaters gonna Boat
Titanics

3:33 pm February, 13 Guid is Good said...

Who would have thought that in just two short years we would miss those simple, Old Skool, turkey molesting antics of Stackhouse? Hang in there Gynochin, your day will come.

6:54 pm February, 13 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Pleathers gonna pleath.

7:02 pm February, 13 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I wouldn’t squat that skank with this guy’s dick.

10:41 pm February, 13 The Dude said...

Pooetry.

6:31 am February, 14 DarkSock said...

Jacques…nope, I ain’t clickin’ it.

.

NoSiree.

6:41 am February, 14 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Nice one Jacques. Vestigial penis penis penis.

7:55 am February, 14 Tanath said...

Does he really do push ups on public bathroom floors? Because that’s gross…

9:49 pm February, 14 Anon said...

How is ‘clubbing only’ a plan? A plan requires thought. A plan requires preparation. Usually, a brain is required to formulate a plan. This one wouldn’t recognize a ‘plan’ even if he stepped on a bear trap. He would only wonder at the searing pain in his leg.

1:20 pm February, 15 Zowieisyoursavior said...

And still the eternal question prevails: why, oh why Lawd, did she go home with HIM???

1:21 pm February, 15 Zowieisyoursavior said...

Kim Kardashian’s first attempt at a sex video…

1:19 am February, 16 Stephanie said...

It’s great that you can get such a “ripped” body…too bad guys are more interested than the girls.

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