Bubble Folk
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Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Ball Don't Lie
In sports, when a referee makes a bad call and the subsequent play goes against the team that benefited from that bad call, fans use the simple koan, “ball don’t lie.”
This beautiful three word expression speaks to a reality beyond our subjective experience.
People, like referees, may refuse to see the world accurately.
But truth will out.
The scales will balance.
Cosmic justice will eventually be served.
One of the unifying themes of the hottie/douchey couplings we study here at HCwDB involves the abject panic of growing up. Notice I don’t describe this as a panic over growing old. Although that is certainly a part of it.
So much of peacocking spectacle is about the fear of maturity. Growing up is the figuring out of some semblance of meaning and direction that lies beyond the here and now. Of needing to get a job.
Have children. Pay bills.
Pumped up Morty and Letita here are case in point. Old enough to know better. Refusing to give up the inflated dream of enhanced spectacle.
Fight it for as long as you want, guys. In the end, ball don’t lie.
Wednesday, January 15, 2014Putztopia
Armtatts, cylindrical beverages, bikinis, and a canted frame of a young couple on a beach define our cultural zeigeist like a squirrel with diarrhea crapping on a chestnut.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013Your Wednesday Bros and Hotts on a Boat
“Bro!! Pass the Bud Light Lime!!” sad the cat with a wicked grin.
And the Jester said “Hoo Hoo!” and the Queen said “Haa Haa!”
And everybody got syphilis.
— Excerpt from Lewis Carroll’s Alice in Doucheyland
Tuesday, October 22, 2013And then this happened
Shark hats.
It’s like telling the world you’re “gangster,” only instead of gangster, it’s “five year old boy into sharks.”
Nicole has the hard meth eyes of short term love and long term childrearing without a feasible source of income.
Wednesday, June 5, 2013Colin Pops a Pimple
SO Justin Bieber and 2-Pac meet in hell in the afterlife.
Justin Bieber says, “Hey 2-Pac! What are you doing here? I thought you lived a virtuous life!”
2-Pac says, “You know, Biebs, so did I, but my sins caught up with me. Turns out all that bangin’ and smokin’ just doesn’t fly with the lord.”
Bieber responds, “Man, that sucks! I thought for sure you’d make it to heaven.”
2-Pac: “Anyways, what about you, Bieber? I thought you were all about being innocent?”
Justin Bieber replies, “Yeah, so it seemed. But the truth is, once I cornholed an aardvark with a slab of butter and an artichoke heart. It was while I was on tour. But a little demon showed up and told me then that I was going to hell. And here I am.”
And 2-Pac replies, “Shit, Biebs, that really doesn’t make sense! This is like one of those long, meandering jokes that DB1 makes up when he’s filling text in on a post on Hot Chicks with Douchebags and doesn’t know what to write, and then can’t come up with a punchline.”
Bieber responds, “Yeah, I know what you mean. It’s almost like this comedy is half-assed ill thought out crap, proof of DB1’s laziness.”
2-Pac: “Yup. That about sums it up. Wanna rap “California” with me at Satan’s Red River Karaoke?”
Bieber: “Hells yeah I do!!”
And…. scene.
Bonus Woo Hottie Pear for those whose hard work will always be rewarded.
Thursday, May 23, 2013One Guy, Four DD Cups
There is an interesting back-story to this photo, I’m sure.
I defer to you, the reader, to expand upon it in the comments section.
