Honorary HCwD of the Month: Bowflex Bag
Maybe you’ve seen Michael Polinko.
He’s “in the best shape of his life” and “forty-nine years old and living the dream!” in those awful Bowflex home gym ads that play in heavy rotation on The Sci-Fi Channel.
Every time I DVR Battlestar I gotta fast forward through that greased up mug’s homoerotic workout.
Hey Bowflex Bag, I’m not impressed by your greasy douched-out abs, your age, or the fact you’re proud you play in a “rock and roll band.” I’m sure your rockin’ Bob Seger covers are fantastic to the drunk waitress at the local Wings n’ Things, but I don’t need to stare at you pumping iron every six and a half minutes while I’m waiting for that blonde cylon uber-hottie in the red dress to come back on.
Now get the hell off my T.V. before I frak your ass.
