Fwippy
Is that ski-slope fwippy fauxhawk even possible given the constraints of the known laws of physics? It completely defies gravity.
Is he ‘bag? Perhaps not. Gaybag? If so, he’s disqualified, as gaybags operate outside of heteronormative definitions of douchebaggery. They have their own rules, which I know not how to categorize.
But either way, the fwip on Fwippy makes me fwip.
I want to shave it with a rusty shank-spoon, then dive between her perfect Downy fresh snow pillows and repose with a mug of hot chocolate and a copy of Rolling Stone. Where I’ll read about the demise of MTV while snuggling giant boobies.