Hot Chicks With Douche Bags

Sneaky Businessman From Indiana

I don’t know what you’re up to, Sneaky Businessman From Indiana.

But it’s trouble.

Is he ‘bag? Perhaps not, although the two-tone Regis Philbin shirt-and-tie color scheme makes my crotch itch flare.

But each of these pouty hotts needs my attention. And by attention, I mean deep philosophical interest in their well being. And by deep philosophical interest in their well being, I mean spanking them lightly with a Connect Four until adorable shades of the lightest pink rise up and sing sonnets from “Godspell.”