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Friday, December 5, 2008
Caption This Pic
At the lesser known Ft. Lauderdale “Juanita’s Secret Runway Fashion Show,” Dieter showed off his new aqua d-neck.
Lynyrd Skynrd, The Dyshe Yrs
This is one one kitchen that needs more than just a lysol/bleach surface cleaning.
Friday Haiku
Creepy “Reality,”
Montag, Douchebag, Happy Days,
Crabbies on the beach.
heidi and spencer
sitting in a tree…k-i-…
BLAM! BLAM! POW! POW! BLAM!
— johnny scrotten
Spencer busts a move
And Heidi jiggles blandly
Please sterilize them
— Vin Douchal
Beached G.I. Scrote-Bag
Tries new “Kung-Fu Shocker Grip”
No way out Barbie.
— canadouche
it’s Barbie and Ken,
anatomically correct,
please light them on fire.
— pfah
I got to work late
Sat down with mug of coffee
Want to smash these two
– Douche Wayne
Friday, December 5, 2008Scarfbaggery, Contd.
More evidence of the douche-scarf seen here, as Wall Street Bankerbag headlocks a perky creamsicle hott of lickable shoulder and pearly white enamel.
Thursday, December 4, 2008It's 9:42pm…
…do you know where your ex-girlfriend is?
Ask DB1: Scarfbaggery
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He said he got the idea from L.A and hes trying to bring it to the east coast(D.C). Well he has embarrassed us a lot since every time we go out hes wearing that stupid scarf.
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The scarf has become the go-to adouchrement in recent weeks, confusing many ‘bag hunters on this site to posit if the wearers were gay. Like many objects of adornment in the age of male spectacle, scarfs have made the leap from gay subculture to hetero douche culture.
As such, they are to be mocked accordingly, until it’s chilly enough to warrant their wearing.
On an unrelated note to the question, I would suck on fiery latina’s supple legs like an electrocuted dolphin struggling to free itself from a fishing net off the coast of Osaka.
Thursday, December 4, 2008The Smorgsbord of Scrote
It’s like the douchal equivalent of the all-you-can-eat buffet at the Rabinowitz Bar Mitzvah.
Fish Slap is Ready for the 2008 Douchies
2007 Douchie Winner and runner-up to Joey Porsche for the covered HCwDB of the Year, the Hall of Scrote legend that is Fish Slap, wanted to drop by and wish the 2008 Douchie Contestants luck on Monday.
He brought Jenny, the bartender girl, and even brought a friend who loves his penis.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008Ask DB1: Dating the Roidbag
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DB1-
The Hott in the photo has been a friend of mine for years and confided in me that she found needle tracks near the Scrote’s scrotum. When she asked him about it, he said that he takes “legal” muscle enhancers and his precious pipes were too beautiful to scar.. so, he would rather stick a needle next to his roid-shriveled pieces.
She asked me what I thought she should do… keep in mind, she is the rare Hott that isn’t a soleless, clubbing retard. Do I tell her to break up with the sac and ride my beer belly instead? Nope. That’s where you come in. I hope to right my wrongs and restore balance to the universe.
– tiredstudent
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Since in this one single pic, the Roidbag is violating four of the nine categories of douche I list as key identifiers in my book (Kissy Lips, Jesus Bling, Pink Popped Collar, Spiky Fro), I’d say the fact she doesn’t already sense deep fungal nastiness is deeply problematic, TS.
If a hott finds ‘roid tracks next to her boyfriend’s jimmy jubbles and stays with him, she is stage-4 Bleeth, and you must move on.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008The Monarch of the Sea
PIC DELETED
Because Belloq only had a chest tattoo of the front of the headpiece to the Staff of Ra, they’re douching in the wrong place.
Yup, never get tired of the Raiders references. Never.
