Friday Haiku
Spikey Blowout Ken,
Blasts wind into Simone’s face,
Hark! Too many beans.
Allergy season:
Claritin and Goose don’t mix;
danger for poor bleeths.
– Wheezer
Fungus from Ken’s head
Simone recoils in horror
From leaping head lice
– Vin Douchal
Ken mugs Bleeth Susie
while releasing Ass Kraken
to destroy Simone.
– Mr. White
The toothy eels in
Kim’s nostrils are making plans
to eat douche and bleeth.
– Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche
Axe sun tan lotion
Blatant, culture erosion
Implant explosion
– Anonymous
Ditzy young white girl,
Succumbs to sudden seizure
Just like Fred Sanford.
– scrotum pole
Oh poor sweet Simone.
Safer to stand behind horse.
Wisely shields boobies.
-Amerigo Vesdouchey
Drugs from left to right:
Cocaine, good marijuana
And lemon ball-sack
— saulgoode42
Kurt and Jen signal
“Two if by Pee”. Drunken Bleeth
should find a raincoat.
– Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
Lisa starts to vurp
from combo of Axe and beans
Trish to follow soon.
Two boobs, two fingers,
two fingers. Its enough to
make Simone vomit.
Ken talks out his ass
and overwhelms boobie hott –
Needs Hollisterine
Ken flicks a peace sign,
Stacey recoils in horror,
At Ken’s poor hygiene.
Simone will soon puke;
fondles her own boobs to try
to make sickness pass.
Bewbs close to rupture
Silicone wash to follow
Drown the douche and bleeth.
Massive shart is soon
to rid the world of these two.
Give Barb massive props.
They must be Browns fans:
Simone has the orange face
while Ken is just poo.
Young Kurt Russell signs
‘Two babes’, but young Goldie can’t
stomach thought of douche.
Eight abortions this month
for Karen. Doctor Douche and
Nurse Kaitlin scrub up.
Two immune to Axe,
Simone finds out the hard way
that three is a crowd.
The couple clown as,
Lisa suddenly suffers
Cardiac arrest.
The toothy eels in
Kim’s nostrils are making plans
to eat douche and bleeth.
It’s a Fart Contest
Douche Ken survives hair blow back
But Simone looks ‘Out’.
Ken and Beth argue
about who has less brain cells
while Barb’s head explodes.
Our “duche”bag bud Rod
told Simone to chew his ass;
reply speaks volumes.
Axe sun tan lotion
Blatant, culture erosion
Implant explosion
This sparse room needs some
color. Kate soon decorates
with shart and vomit.
Not a cloud of ash
Hovering over Iceland
It’s Ken’s fart/Axe cloud
Jen struggles to hold
down her lunch, as she sees friend
Kim begin douche mate.
Party at Karen’s –
Simone regrets attendance
and last Grey Goose chug.
Now she’s so plastered
she can’t keep her hands off boobs.
I’ll help her to bed.
Ditzy young white girl,
Succumbs to sudden seizure
Just like Fred Sanford.
Damn this formatting!
I wanted a space between
my last two haiku!
Karen becomes sick
from Axe bomb she set to get
rid of douche. Poor girl.
Freckled brunette hott
Probably better in bed
Than dead bleeth, at least
This room needs some work,
but you might want to find some
other contractors.
Roofies kicking in
You gave her two? So did I
Yay! Time to get laid
Her head is pointing
the wrong way for projectile
vomit geyser fun.
Something caught my eye:
Her arms more hairy than his
My boner just died
Dude in background waits,
For moment of sweet success,
When roofies kick in.
He’s the sperm donor
For these two married lezzies
Simone faints from shock
Live definitions
from Urban Dictionary:
“shitfaced” and “disgust.”
Bewb smash does not help
to erase the sight before
her. Puke on its way.
Allergy season:
Claritin and Goose don’t mix;
danger for poor bleeths.
Allergy season:
It happens this time of year,
Kim sneezes again.
The Diane Farr Hott
Tells how many cockks she likes
Ken says, “Hey! Me , too!”
Holy shit, Wheezer,
A simultaneous post.
But, damn, you beat me!
Joey then deploys
his tailbone-mounted penis.
Simone is surprised.
Kurt’s ‘two’ tells nurse Jen
He just went poo in his pants
Jen and Kim confirm
That’s fine, scrotum pole –
we’re both allergic to choad.
Isn’t everyone?
Couple on the right
has no personality.
Run-of-the-mill ‘tards.
.
Double-peace sign cross?
Why not be more creative?
Stackhouse would crush you.
Infant death syndrome,
Is not supposed to happen,
When you’re twenty-one.
Elbow to the tits
Causes Simone to react
to douche infection
Ken mugs Bleeth Susie
while releasing Ass Kraken
to destroy Simone.
Kurt’s green band is from
Hollister Psychiatric
They will fix his nuts.
Kim is finding out,
It’s real hard to sleep it off,
While you’re standing up.
Smug Peace knows what’s up
Stick phone jack up one girl’s butt
Boobs will catch excess
Drunken orange-faced bleeth
Tries not to puke on new boobs
Paid a lot for them
Ken strikes easy pose
something familiar yet odd
a feather fixture
“We’ll snip each other!”
“I’ll yank off my boobs you guys!!”
WTF is this?
A feather in a
light fixture, causes Ken’s hair
never mind, it’s gel
Fungus from Ken’s head
Simone recoils in horror
From leaping head lice
White walls represent
no cultural adornment.
Even Red Cup hides.
Dichotomy pic:
Left–way gone, but on the right?
She can still be saved.
Simone discovered
she could increase her cup size
if she holds her breath.
Ken likes Taco Bell.
So, flatulently challenged.
New Tortada’s out.
.
Oh poor sweet Simone.
Safer to stand behind horse.
Wisely shields boobies.
.
.
-Amerigo Vesdouchey
Kurt and Jen signal
“Two if by Pee”. Drunken Bleeth
should find a raincoat.
baby faced douchebag
learns the hard way: too much axe
kills lesser creatures.
Drugs from left to right:
Cocaine, good marijuana
And lemon ball-sack
Meg soon discovers,
The winds of change are blowing.
Are foul winds indeed.
“They’re just kids,” you claim?
Well, I weep for the future.
Go back to clubhouse.
Meg tries to hold yak
in mouth, while Kurt, Jen signal
He’s a stage 2 douche.
Popp’d out follicles
Static electricty
From phone jack up arse
Simone is not sick.
She’s just letting Kuato
out to scold douchebag.
downwind from the Axe
olfactory sense destroyed
save the boobies first
Googled “Kuato”
since I didn’t recognize.
I wish I hadn’t
Kate learns the hard way
douche hair gel contraception
causes burned cooter.
Kurt tells Jane that He’s
got to take a number two
Not new news to Kim
Ken needs two gallons
of donkey jizz to spike hair;
Simone’s, like, grossed out.
This couple pairs off
on the news they have both had
just two STD’s.
Simone squeezes boobs
Says “If I wish 3 times I’ll
Go back to Kansas.”
Stench of douche too strong
Blonde recoils in disgust
Brunette’s nose? It lies!
When you miss a chance
to ‘hook up’, Bleeth demonstrates
Boobies help console.
Short attention spans
can’t handle decade parties –
just back to oh-six.
Oh the tragedy!
Ken’s choosing another hott
Makes Simone’s boobs hurt
Kim recoils at news
That Kurt and Jen have twice had
unprotected sex.
she grabs her own boob
abercrombie cologne stinks
fuck jimmy clausen
The tragedy is,
The worm which passed through her breast,
Laid several eggs.
Hot self-fondling,
Or nasty acid reflux?
Either way, let’s bone.
i haven’t got a haiku, but i have got something almost better! check out this vid i found on youtube if you hate guidos http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5q0OWUPUpk
Electricity,
Fork and outlet are needed
To comb hair each day.
sorry my bad, god fuck a monkey shit wrong link , heres the guido vid http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPZWWEFf83Y
lol epic fail u all r epic fail. fail! haha anyway i got 2 go now nd count the rocks on my watch y’all still buyin pebbles i got the benzels we go pop pop motherfucker know wat im sthayin?
2 plus 2 makes 4
Miasma, putrid decay
must protect the boob
can I change the first line to 2 plus 2 makes poo?
okay
2 plus 2 makes poo
miasma, putrid decay
must protect boob
(yeah that’s the ticket)
[9:14 am
April, 16
doo doo doo de doo imma douchebag! said…
lol epic fail u all r epic fail. fail! haha anyway i got 2 go now nd count the rocks on my watch y’all still buyin pebbles i got the benzels we go pop pop motherfucker know wat im sthayin?]
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No, I have no idea what you’re saying. I don’t speak run-on.
But now I have this strange urge to watch Airplane!
what is the process?
Sqeeze my boobs & cut a fart
to texture coat walls
What if we stop here?
How will MuthaFucker post
one hundred? Last Call!
“T.S.k, T.S.k, April is
the cruelest month,” said El-
iot, “Two-fer Bleeths!”
Looks like Fanged Leeches
Found her mammal orifice
And started chewing.
Ken and Kate give the
signal for cooties as Kee-
ly freaks with itchies.
Stick-up hair, droopy
hair, it’s all spiked no matter
which way it’s pointed.
Hedgehogs and horses
are such soulmates when manes and
body lice are involved.
massive explosion
required. right here. right now. smirk
needs fast removal.