Friday, June 11, 2010
Friday Haiku
Brothabag Damon knows
How to score with drunk bridesmaids,
Perfume the chin fung.
laughs at this guy, says “No game.”
Chin pubage lacking.
— Wheezer
Lamisha Johnson
Just got off her welder’s shift
I’d flip the bird, too.
— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
Bespeckled genius
Age IQ or douche boy friends
Princess chokes her chicken
— Claude Douchenburg
dovetail-joint chin pubes,
attract royal admirer,
and “sausage fingers”.
— Colossus of Choads
Bling Crosby knows that
In order to claim boobies
Must first ditch fat wife
— saulgoode42
In Utah, Damon
can take advantage of lax
societal rules.
— Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche
Jiffy Lube is closed,
Brothabag Damon parties.
Spends seven month’s pay.
— Amerigo Vesdouchey
Just like UTG
This douche will rea
Bling and the finger
Detract from pretty princess
Leah. She is sweet.
Brothabag Leon
laughs at this guy, says “No game.”
Chin pubage lacking.
Lamisha Johnson
Just got off her welder’s shift
I’d flip the bird, too.
Nubian princess,
I’ll suckle mocha shoulders
and boobie boulders.
Bespeckled genius
Age IQ or douche boy friends
Princess chokes her chicken
Brothabag Damon
Goes with the Chest Shave Reveal
And highlights with bling.
Wow, the kids these days
keep looking older, don’t they?
Quinceañera bleeth.
Choke-chain on his neck:
I hope hott’s bracelet gets caught,
rips his jugular.
Brothabag Damon
sports a ginormous wrist band
Where is big ass watch?
dovetail-joint chin pubes,
attract royal admirer,
and “sausage fingers”.
Princess Tiara
Brothabag Anton Lavay
And Lou Costello
Hott has nice boobies
But the crucifix distracts
Makes me feel shameful
Hott has cross to bear;
she just does it with Canaans
we should all worship.
Large Marge the trucker;
Flips the bird, doesn’t like dudes.
Damon doesn’t care.
.
Jiffy Lube is closed,
Brothabag Damon parties.
Spends seven month’s pay.
.
.
-Amerigo Vesdouchey
Left to right: Janet,
Tito, and–HEY!–it’s Michael!
(Thought he died last year..?)
Bling Crosby knows that
In order to claim boobies
Must first ditch fat wife
Think of crucifix
As ‘X’ Marks the Spot. Fun Bags
Must be God’s gifting?
As night grows longer
Damon gets better looking
for bleeths with no brains.
Will it be shotgun
wedding for Damon and bleeth?
Vet says puppies soon.
It’s Cinderella,
the Prince Bling Sharting, and the
wicked step-beyotch.
Is white on his shirt
misplaced blow from tragic sneeze?
Lakeesha will taste.
In Utah, Damon
can take advantage of lax
societal rules.
Hott wears tiara
She deserves the first-place prize
Right here in my pants
Smirking ‘bird’ lady
Ain’t gonna let her DB
Even enjoy this
“I do” says drunk bleeth
to all in the pic. ” We all
can share my crabs now!”
Shirt style flaws include:
design, lack of top buttons,
and putrid Axe stench.
Oh Paula Abdul,
will you never stop drinking?
You have me Straight Up.
Damon seems unsure
of which butt he has peed in.
Either way is bad.
Is it tiara?
Or is it sunlight? Either
way, she is Princess.
Bleeths thought that stripper
was going to be hot. Got
HUGE disappointment.
Each time Bro gets laid
A baby alpaca dies
Stop the carnage
Bleeth Shelly on right:
U tryin’ 2 B urban?
Go back to suburbs.
This guy ain’t so bad
and his girl is cute, but what’s
with the dude in shades?
Princess showin off her Bs
Brothabag wants a threesome
Bleeth loves cock & balls
Looks like Brothabag
Is deeply contemplating
life. Or just went poo.
Bleeths are so drunk that
they thought douche was hot DJ.
No only waiter.
Beeyotch on the right
Looks like some crazy lezbo
In women’s prison
Ticket in the bra
Other Bleeth giving finger
Damon wins blue balls
D-Wayne ain’t ballin’:
lifted bling from Mom’s armoire,
Dad’s shirt from attic.
Another classy
Vegas wedding in the AXE
sponsored trash dumpster.
Tough Bleeth on the right
Has ass dildo’d both of them
“Yes” Damon says, “Both”
Flippy McBirdster
tries to object at wedding.
Bro and sis still wed.
This Bitchfest gives us
Some typical Lakers fans
Proves NBA sucks
Lakeisha points out
The broken glass of Princess
The rest’s in his ass.
Damon takes break from
working men’s room glory hole.
Bleeths are really dudes.
Vegas hideaway
Watery drinks, smelly folks
Fake bling convention
Princess, lean forward…..
no really, I’m a dentist.
I fill cavities.
Parole officer
flips bird to camera before
crackheads go downtown.
The bag hand gestures
and bling overcompensate
mediocrity.
This photo gives us
Like zero testosterone
And three Nancy-fems
Bride has ticket to
safari suite. Too bad douche
is hung like an ant.
Pouty lips couple
invited by friend to pout
at her bling party.
Princess Cleavage is
nice but mutton chin’s cleavage
needs buttoning up.
35%
blinding bling, 10% boobs,
all the rest is poo.
Skin bleaching party
Went well with everybody
Until Damon’s fart.
Princess diary:
“Costume ball just a big hoax,
as was Trey’s manhood.”
Work keeps this brotha
From joining haiku on time
Now back to meeting…
Girl, I’ll treat you right.
You gonna be my princess.
Shawnayy’s comin’ too.
Kettlehead’s fashions
not something to follow, Trey.
Button your damn shirt.
Is he a brotha?
He looks mixed with hispanic
and old taco meat.
Ching Fung a message
He misses President Bush
Known as the “W”
Bleethy on the right
Does not miss Bushie Jr.
Sends a message too
Princess looks for prince,
told to smooch toad; she heard “choad,”
happiness chance croaked.
Photo gives new meaning
To “Joe’s Crab Shack” don’t it?
Time to buy more Rid
^Sorry, I forgot how to count.
Damon macks on hott
But this doesn’t sit real well
With the lesbo-douche
Nice work, baghunters!
Laughs a-plenty this morning!
Early ass pear, Boss?
Now where is our pear?
69 comments
We should try to keep it such
Wait–I’ve ruined it!
Mexcico City
Work trip. No time for mocking.
Lots to catch up on.
.
UTG Epic
Had to add my one one cent
Salty Fukken Tears
@me^
“own”.
It’s called English, idiot.
Damon wants to know
Where all the white women at?
Patience. Bleach takes time
If you like Mel Brooks
You would recognize that line
They said you was hung…
It’s been a long time
Since I logged on soon enough
For Friday haiku 🙁
Far East Asian Hotts
Christ on crucifix stares at
Lovely cleavage gap
Like lipstick on a
pig, putting shiney on a
pud: it’s still a pud
sh-sh-sh-sh-shit
m-missed tha boat again…
sh-sh-sh-sh-shi
gonorrhea farm
herpes herpes syphilis
clamydia bake
My First Haiku:
i have to open a store for douchbags
they will buy
anything with Ed Hardy
on the label
suckers.
Cheap shit from China the people who wear it,and the clothes…
How did i do?
three-pronged chin pubes more
deadly than Satan’s pitchfork.
damn, watch out dear hotts!
There’s a whole lotta
tilting goin’ on with heads
and hand signals, DOUCHE!
Queens wear tiaras
while douchebags choose the multi-
strand necklace and pout.
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