Thursday, June 24, 2010

Montesquieu Finds A Four Pack of Love

And so does your humble narrator.

Come to me, Blue Dolphin Exotic Curvy Adventure Map Hott Martina. I would lightly massage your shoulders with raw eggs and confectioners sugar, and then we would listen to Mahler in stereo on a dual set of retro headphones my father stole from Radio Shack in 1983. And then I would praise your boobies with esoteric adjectives while rubbing my belly with a damp mixture of sand and terrycloth. And then you would call your brother to come pick you up. Which he would. While I sat quietly in the den, watching DVDs of The Wire.

# posted by douchebag1
9:36 am June, 24 Just Sayin said...

Buttaface, buttaface, dickwad, maybe, maybe.

9:37 am June, 24 MoeDouche said...

Is it possible to photoshop Taco-chulo from the picture?

9:39 am June, 24 Tony Ventresca said...

perfect; perfect; bullet in back of head; perfect; left arm grafted on from a lfie size Barbie doll

9:54 am June, 24 Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt said...

Fwap, fwap-fwap, BAM, fwap-fwap-fwap-fwappity-fwap-fwap-fwap…,

fwap-fwap-fwap-fwappity-fwap-fwap-fwap…

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UNNNNGHHHHH

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Smoke ’em, if ya got ’em!

10:00 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

There’s not a grain of cocaine left within a 2 mile radius of this spectacle.

10:01 am June, 24 Crucial Head said...

Ladies, bringing your gardener to dinner was a noble thing to do… but you shouldn’t have left his defenseless Labrador at home by itself.

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I’ll be riiiiiight back.

10:02 am June, 24 Pablo Sinatra said...

Apart from one arm making cursory contact with the back of this douchebag, I’d swear none of them even realize he’s in the picture. And even the girl making unfortunate, accidental physical contact with him is giving her full attention to her girlfriend. The date on hte pic says it’s New Years Eve, so my guess is, these girls are all so hammered they think they’re posing with the dog. An ugly, crewcut dog that somebody soaked in Axe Body Spray.

10:02 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to coke what middle aged lonely divorced women are to Sybians®.

10:03 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what middle aged lonely divorced men are to Rogaine®.

10:04 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what pit bulls are to Jimmy Dean L’il Smokies® cocktail weenies

10:05 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what Crucial Head® is to gardener’s pets.

10:06 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what the 80’s were to Levis® faded denim shorts.

10:09 am June, 24 Crucial Head said...

These girls are to cocaine, what Mr. White is to urine.

10:10 am June, 24 Crucial Head said...

These girls are to cocaine, what Boss is to Hostess and Night Train.

10:11 am June, 24 Crucial Head said...

These girls are to cocaine, what Plinky’s mom is to Krispy Kreme.

10:14 am June, 24 Teddy Tendergass said...

These girls are to cocaine, what Hooman Karamian is to recycled web content.

10:14 am June, 24 Justin said...

These girls are to cocaine, what Charlie Sheen is to cocaine.

10:15 am June, 24 G. Gorgeous Clitty said...

These girls are to cocaine, what Spurs Fan and Boston Douchebag are to filthy male bung holes.

10:16 am June, 24 Justin said...

These girls are to cocaine, what blue whales are to krill.

10:16 am June, 24 wonderdouche twin said...

These girls charge a buck twenty five and hour.

10:20 am June, 24 End the Haberdouchery said...

These girls:cocaine, Italian soccer:diving.

10:20 am June, 24 Justin said...

That guy’s forehead is so shiny, BP sprayed 4,000 gallons of Corexit chemical dispersant at his face.

10:22 am June, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Bedtime For Bozo. The 10 year reunion didn’t go as he planned when he found out the chicks he once pined for were a group of lipstick lesbos. And these girls are to cocaine what Al Sharpton is to N’words.

10:22 am June, 24 Justin said...

That chicks earring’s are imported from Krypton.

10:23 am June, 24 Justin said...

chick’s earrings

10:23 am June, 24 Douchelips said...

European MILFs? I’ll take the second from the right please.

10:34 am June, 24 Bagnonymous said...

These chicks : cocaine : : Me at age 15 : Vaseline and hand-lotion

10:41 am June, 24 Mr. Scrotato Head said...

Is it me or does everyone of them have something wrong with one of their legs?

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And these hotts are to cocaine what Dicy is to the Apache Point Observatory.

10:43 am June, 24 Bagnonymous said...

(PS. FECK YOU Google® search redirect virus!!!)

.

…f*cking retards with nothing better to do than write virus scripts. Probably the same a$$holes who anonymously post on HCwDB chastising Crucial Head for wanting to manually stimulate total strangers’ gardeners’ dogs…

10:45 am June, 24 Bagnonymous said...

@ Scrotato:

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I don’t detect any leg-problems–unless you consider the fact that they’re not splayed apart and pointing towards the ceiling a problem. In which case, yes.. major problems.

10:59 am June, 24 The Right Honorable Member for, The Very Reverend Mother Her Duchal Serene Highness, Dr, Hortense Sussudio Fuckerfaster said...

bud light lime presents “the most circumstantially present man alive”

10:59 am June, 24 Amerigo Vesdouchey said...

These girls are to cocaine what Amerigo is to dunkel weiss beer and Jack Daniels.

11:08 am June, 24 P Showard Chunt said...

these girls are to cocaine what monsanto’s seed business is to horizontal integration.

not that i wouldn’t horizontally integrate them like boston area public schools in the early 70s, until i spread my own seed business everywhere, and if they wanted to swallow my growing concern,i would be happy to divest those assets at a premium, i’m sure i would be able to secure venture capital for another start-up in no time.

11:11 am June, 24 Mr. White said...

These girls are to cocaine what high-ranking U.S. military officers are to open scorn and dissent.

What, too soon?

11:21 am June, 24 Mr. White said...

These girls are to cocaine what the cast of The Jersey Shore is to Valtrex.

11:22 am June, 24 Mr. White said...

These girls are to cocaine what any sea creature in the Gulf is to a rich, creamy BP coating.

11:29 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what BP is to competency.

11:29 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what Fortune 500 companies are to ethics.

11:30 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what the Rug Doctor® is to dirt.

11:31 am June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what Plinky’s Mom is to running gags.

.

.

.

And by “gags” I mean “sores”.

11:40 am June, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These girls are to cocaine what Rush Limbaugh is to plungers.

11:41 am June, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These girls are to cocaine what Ruch Limbaugh is to oxycontin and cheese.

11:42 am June, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These girls are to cocaine what soccer is to non-sports.

11:43 am June, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These girls are to cocaine what Glenn Beck is to irrationality.

11:43 am June, 24 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

These girls are to cocaine what I am to cheap liquor.

11:58 am June, 24 Deltus said...

These girls are to cocaine what Stackhouse is to uberdouchery.

12:12 pm June, 24 Baleen said...

They don’t do cocaine, they just love the way it smells…

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.

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Boss, I needs me some Ass Pear. Gotta go to work. Fucck.

12:15 pm June, 24 jonezy said...

There is no doubt about it- this pic will have to win ‘Most Expensive First Date’ Hott(s). That must be 10 grand just for the girls to show up in the first place.

.

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Total age in this picture, 192.

12:20 pm June, 24 DarkSock said...

These girls are to cocaine what LAMP is to Ass Pear.

12:26 pm June, 24 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

The crowd grew silent when Jorge entered the room. Everyone had heard the stories and now they could see they were true. Most people played them off as rumors or innuendo but now, the proof was right before them. Sure, everyone had heard that Crucial Head was busy wanking off a gardener’s dog in order to curry favor with the four hotts at this party. Hell, that was common knowledge but Jorge took it one step further. Once he found out that his dog had been sullied he knew he needed to take action. In a rage, Jorge sliced off his dog’s wiener (because of the nasty Crucial Head touching it), dehydrated it, painted it black, and then hung it around his neck for all to see. No one would be able to do anything to his dog ever again in their quest for unobtainable hott sucklethigh.

12:37 pm June, 24 Merle Baggard said...

Wow, I like Pinky.

12:40 pm June, 24 Vin Douchal said...

I vote for second Hott from the right.

And by vote I mean splash a a protein shake out of my cockk hole all over her “Do-Me” yes

12:40 pm June, 24 Vin Douchal said...

yes= eyes

1:15 pm June, 24 doucheywallnuts said...

MONTESQUIEU qualifies for DBotW based on quality bleeth to douchebag ratio.

1:39 pm June, 24 P Showard Chunt said...

these girls are to cocaine what john holmes was to pigeons.

or hymens

take your pick

i honestly didn’t have a preference

1:41 pm June, 24 P Showard Chunt said...

these girls are to cocaine what mike tyson is to beauty pageants.

1:42 pm June, 24 P Showard Chunt said...

these girls are to cocaine what atlantic city is to social security checks.

1:51 pm June, 24 P Showard Chunt said...

these girls are to cocaine what heath ledger was to sequels

2:20 pm June, 24 massengill said...

They are to cocaine as Stackhouse is to deep-fried turkeys.

2:24 pm June, 24 boatbutter said...

Pound for pound (all 390 of them), this may be the hottest 4-pack of Hotts gathered together in a pic.

And I agree with every word stated in this thread.

2:56 pm June, 24 OMG, Hottie Alert!!!!! said...

^^^^^(last two posts)^^^^^

5:30 pm June, 24 SortaDamocles said...

These girls are to cocaine what priests are to confused altar boys.

7:28 pm June, 24 Steve L. said...

these girls are to cocaine what katanas are to Hattori Hanzo.

11:31 pm June, 24 Whoop-di-douche said...

These girls are to cocaine what the Four Musketeers are to sugar cream pie.

12:09 am June, 25 Anonymous said...

Second from the right hott Caroline is slightly trampy eighties hott goodness.

I’d gnaw on her Ridgemonts any day

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