Thursday, July 8, 2010
Breaking: Area Man Realizes The Onion Sucks Alpaca Testes
The Onion’s “The Chive” once again finds “inspiration” from other sites on the internets.
Not even a link, Onionites? Really?
EDIT: The Chive is apparently not affiliated with The Onion, so apologies to Area Man. Carry on.
That’s a handful of ass!
Twisty-face has a Chinese tattoo that reads “I fuck holes in the ground”.
Onionite admins apparently don’t cotton to folks posting stuff about menfolk peein’ inside of horses either.
That’s when Lenny felt the warm wet dangling sticky cotton string.
Roughly 95% of The Onion’s humor is provided in about 1% of the article — namely, in the title.
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(I admit, though, that like a battered spouse, I keep going back.)
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When I scrolled to the comments section of the page linked to by Our Great Leader, I was reminded of the inverse correlation between the intelligence of a site’s readers and the frequency with which they post “FIRST!”
I wrote something on the Chive post but they won’t run it. F you Chive!! Posting pictures from the past 3 years from HCwDB and calling them new??? Good job!
Sun and Asian writing tattoo = Choad Stain
Hot ass and bad hair = Tasty Skank
Darksock, they apparently don’t think much of peeing in onions, either…
I wonder what Jack in the Box will have the pleasure of serving these two Nobel laureates at 2 in the morning.
No, doffus, I said you couldn’t find your ass with both hands. EPIC FAIL.
@Doc B,
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Bingo. I still bring up The Onion’s front page from time to time so I can skim the titles and the first few lines of their articles. Some chuckles can be found here and there.
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Considering the content of some of their articles, the irony of them censoring someone who wants to say “I peed in a horse once” is quite amusing, actually.
… and by ‘Doc B,’ I meant Douchie Howser. Damn doctors are just like architects, we all look and sound the same.
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Heh heh.
I posted a comment mentioning this site.
Even without a full frontal of blondie’s face i’ll take a punt and declare her hott (her arse told me so). However the completely unnecessary shot of Chinese character tatt guy’s obnoxious scone, induces that now familiar nameless dread coupled with a strong desire to knock him out.
But her arse…
Nope. Get used to it.
@ Crucial Head
Agreed. The Onion would only permit stuff regarding urination and equines were it an opinion piece entitled:
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“I Peed in a Horse in View of a Busload of Schoolchildren, and it Taught Them a Valuable Lesson”
“thechive.com is in no way affiliated with theonion.com” says the chive’s disclaimer….
DB1 reminds me of Howard Stern. What else did you invent?
@Vothski,
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What else did DB1 invent?
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DB1 invented the Flowbee® mütherfucker! Additionally, Boss was the first American male to circumcise a walrus with his uncut toenails while driving a boat over a sandbar in Chandeleur Sound. And lastly, he invented… *gasp*… §ąжuræ ScröЋe for chissakes.
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What have yooooouuuu invented lately???
DB1 reminds me of Howard Stern…
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You mean the one who changed the face of radio and helped introduce some of the funniest minds in comedy to the general public?
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Hmmmm…
Re: Lebron James
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Poor BCS, Plinky, Wheezer, Massengill, et al. Cleveland has now gone from a shithole town to a shittier hole town.
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But relax boys, the next round of Cleveland Steamer’s is on me.
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Wait.
Bats baby! Mr. Maru is rocking that grill like nobody’s business. Only a select scrotewang can be one-hundred percent 2002 Douchebag in a land of 2010 Douchebags.
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No.
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Wait.
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The Onion just jacked an old HCwDB pic.
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Well f**k you guys, Bats still cracks me up.
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RE: Lebron James
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This is just one more reason I no longer watch the NBA.
That’s from CHIVE.com, not THEONION.com.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ______. _____ _________
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . /CHIVES IS ONIONS, JAMES!
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . _,,,–~~~~~~~~–,___. _________/
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^Admiral Ackbar semi-fail
he, “this is the face you’ll be starin’ at laterbabe. don’t it make ya wet?”
she, “no, it’s the fantasy that my box is a sausage grinder that really gets me off!”
Shamelessness from the Onion/Chive…..wow, roughly half of those photos can be found here, if not more! Unbelievable…..
Is the Chive actually related to the Onion in ways other than trying to look like it? It doesn’t seem to link to the Onion anywhere -and at the bottom it has a disclaimer:
“theCHIVE.com is the best 6-60 minutes of your day. theCHIVE will make you happy. theCHIVE.com is in no way affiliated with TheOnion.com. theCHIVE is not…”
but…chives is onions…so, you’re saying http://www.TheScallion.com isn’t affiliated with The Onion either? You’ve shaken my entire belief system, dawg.
AREA MAN CONFUSED BY ONION/CHIVES AFFILIATION.
Who’s the douchebag now?
@ugtvdotorg,
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Ummm, the douchenozzle with the ridiculous tattoo, backwards hat, and retard sneer in this picture. Is he so hard to spot?
http://thechive[dot]com/2009/04/30/look-at-this-fking-hipster-22-photos/ …The Chive giving credit to http://lookatthisfuckinghipster.tumblr.com/
WTF?
It stands to reasons that TheLeeks.com is the most suitable place for posts about peeing in a horse’s ass.
Choad makes the mouth pose that inspired his shoulder tatt while grabbing ass that inspires Hott to make the horns signal.
Sort of a Rube Goldberg machine of douchery…
Chazz becomes gripped with terror as he realizes Buffalo Beast will not be pleased that the “blonde” has distracted him from his bukkake duties.
not even a shout-out, DB1, really?
-Captain Buzzkill
botched plastic facial surgeries never had it so good.