Hot Chicks With Douche Bags

Once We Step to Da Masta We Will Be Served Like Sushi

Vegas Ass Kicker responds to HCwDB in the comments thread:

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Once you all grow a set of balls and step to da masta you will be served like sushi on a roll bitch! You know? F#ck no you don’t. Cause yall aint seen no action since yo dr. went up that ass to check yo prostate. Bitches! Why you all hate on Vegas. You c#nts know we gots the best strip clubs, clubs and pool clubs. You little faggots can’t handle my vibe and my action. Its fo real dawgs. Lick it up and stick up yo ass. When you done pull it out and feed yo dawgs cause he love that sh#t taste bitches! Damn! My sh#t all real. My sh#t is the doe sh#t that makes addicts want more. Yall feel me? Nope! Cause you al f#cken retards ride on that short bus. Helmets, drool and all bitches.
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And then moments later:

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I am off to da club to get my d#ck rubbed or sucked. You know nothing about it. Stay home and play with yo little thang. I am going out in style with blang. Bitches! I will take Vegas like a champ. You stay home and lick dick like a stamp. Out c#nts. This me signing out. F#ck this site. F#ck mr.reeve’s bullsh#t site. You all keep posting real Vegas ballers and we just getten better and more play. I am drunk and high. So good night and bye bye. OUT!
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I once ordered the “style with blang” at an Indian restaurant on 6th Street, close to 2nd Ave. I got the runs.

The War of Hardy

J.C. writes in from the front:

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DB1,

– J.C.
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The douchepocalypse continues. But we find our small victories where we can.

Friday Haiku

Itchy Itch is rich,
Like that kid on “Silver Spoons,”
Brit Hotts paid to pose.

Marks-A-Lot Tattoo
Draws hotts to douchebag like moths
To a tainty flame

— fidouchiary responsibility

Blond Mary knows that
Purity is achieved through
clean. Enema, Stat!

— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt

A Christmas Story ‘bag
Awakes to find hotts under tree
Chocolate milk anyone?

— mr.reeve

William F. Buckley:
The Wild, Crazy College Years
“WHAT IS THIS, VASSAR?!?”

— DarkSock

Zack had an idea
Build a social network site
Facebook got there first

— Mr. Scrotato Head

Starter combover
Ralphie Parker all grow’d up
“Check out my tattoo!”

— elder

Lost on the way to
Return of Bosom Buddies
Scolari Junior

— SonnyChibaChoad

Bruised from the swirly.
Charles tries for his first girly.
Chest not like Khan. Khannnn!

— The Reverend Chad Kroeger

Ask DB1: Wrath of Khanbags

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DB1,

-McBagsworth
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Your question is a good one, McB. And may you appreciate the genius of Khan forever.

As you rightly acknowledge, The Wrath of Khan is one of the most asskickingly perfect films of all time. This is beyond dispute.

While the kinetic nonsense with the flashy lights labeled “Star Trek” that came out last year seems to have fooled many moviegoers into thinking it was a good movie, it was not. It was fast. It had explosions. It had a vagina snow monster. But it had no operatic characters, no purpose, nothing epic, poetic or inspired. Nothing like what we saw in the visage of the tragic figure of Khan Noonian Singh.

Khan, and the genius actor who portrays him, Ricardo Montalban, both earn permanent lifetime nottadouches now matter how much greased up chestshave reveal Khan displays, or how many pimp moves he perfects.

But you know this. You ask about Khan’s entourage, or as I like to call it, his Khantourage. Khan’s crew on board the Botany Bay.

Unfortunately, I have to tag them as ‘bags and ‘baguettes. For one thing, I can’t remember any of them. No personalities. Secondly, echoing the alpha male is simply another form of coopting signifiers of douchebaggery to try to get echo ass pear.

The Nihilists

They vill have the lingenberger pancakes.

Billy Gangsta Is The Baddest White Rat Rapper In Town

Pic Deleted

(from this douche’s actual Facebook post:)

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i cheat and beat up on my girlfriend, ill get some sick as songs out of it though for my album debut. im a mother f*cking badass, mess with me and my boys kane and leroy will get their bang bang out on to ya. represent all the south coast dero groupies who keep me going. props to my parents who dont have jobs.

yewwwww! pz
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New Zealand white rappers never looked so badass as they do when preparing for the summer formal.

My Swagger Sucks

But my ability to breakdance remains unparalleled.

Jimmy Scribble

With no paper available at the pool party, Hott Bikini Hannah had to practice her new career inscribing wedding calligraphy somewhere.

Ask DB1: Yankee Caps

PIC DELETED

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Question (unsure if this has been asked on HCwDB yet):

Thanks as usual,
Doo Schnozzle
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Yes. Yes they are.

And, on the flip, Pink Red Sox caps are auto ‘baguette on the ladies.

Where’s Brothabag Edgar?

Somewhere in this pic of extremely award winning quality sapphic collegiate experimentation between BFFs after finals week is over, I’ve carefully hidden HCwDB of the Month winning douchebag Brothabag Edgar.

Look closely. Can you find him contemplating life?