Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Caption This Pic
Unfortunately for the “Vegus Douchbagus,” nursing in captivity can prove especially difficult due to scientific variables like climate, age and inability to find the nipple during “Woo” season.
Mother was shy about her vestigial nipples.
Got Silicone.
Fucking Freud was right after all.
Herb frantically struggles to keep his RealDoll inflated but the damage has been done.
Rachel patiently waits her turn as Cletus sucks the ringworms out of their collective retard boobies.
Retard Boobies? Has a ring to it. Kind of like Womb Rocket.
Motorboating: UR doin’ it wrong!
Me next! Me next!
“I said, I’ll have a Cape Cod with a lime squeeze. Hello? Is this thing on? Can I get some fuccen service?”
Airport security is becoming just creepy now.
Where do I apply?
Fred took the “kiss hello” to an interesting new level.
The girls seemed a little confused during the sermon when Father “Boom Boom” Pussalips invited them up to receive a “personal blessing” where they would feel the touch of the Lord directly through him. Unfortunately all they got for their troubles were boogers, ring worm, a bunch of orange stripes that won’t wash off. Go in peace.
Look Honey, it grew back….
Herb was delighted to find out where they are hiding the inflator hole on the new real dolls.
During the Olympic finals for “Hot Cold”, Herb decided to take the road MOST traveled…
“I smell plastic… do I smell plastic? I smell plastic ,no, it’s ketchup… do I smell ketchup? I smell ketchup,… lemme get up closer …. no… I smell coconuts… do I smell coconuts? …….”
” Hi, I’m SpursFan. This is how we say goodbye to mom when she drops us off at school..”
Hey! That’s not a mouthful of SPF15, that’s dog jizm! Look out Tanya!
” I kees de bobie ferdee luck, den I go to de sweem up blick jick in de pool. I cin pee widout leaving de table. Poopie, too also. Bye de ladies!”
“Thtuck? THTUCK? THTUUUUUUUUUUCK!”
She TRIPLE dog-dared him.
Bleeth Blanket Bingo and their Knob Wad
Last one: “I KNEW they’d F#$%& up the remake of A Christmas Story!”
“Um, my vagina is down there.”
Siamese twin bleeths joined at the breasts look on in horror as Russian Club Rat, Epic Loss, attempts a Silicone Suck Shot.
Any youse girls seen my scab?
Let me guess, dude. Your nickname is “sphincter head”?
“And here we see the yellow-bellied tit-sucker in is natural habitat…”
“Mmmmm om nom nom om-hey, wait, YOU’RE NOT JOEY!”
Fake on the inside, but they still taste like the real thing on the outside!
THIS JUST IN: According to Cracked.com, the German word for “Punch face” is “Backpfeifengesicht”. Some things really are universal.
God Damnit. Here. Geez.
This side squirts ketchup,the other mustard.
Clip-on ties, clip-on sunglasses, clip-on titsuckers, what will they think of next?
Leech sucking therapy is now designed to enlarge boobs, in addition to the universal blood-letting benefits of cleansing the system of fevers.
PUMPY, a la 2011.
In this current climate of extreme gas prices, lining up at the pump takes on new dimensions.
Not even Ayn Rand envisioned such a future as this.
I’m a little jaded right now so I’m gonna go with this:
.
Two stupid whores entertain a fucking jerkoff douchebag.
@Stephanie 8:23a, I was gonna go there but with Diet Coke and Regular Coke. Hand to “God”. Well done Steph.
next thing he knew, Don was sprayed all over his face with breast implant fluid.
Boobies.
Please do not feed the douche.
Menschenjaeger wins.
Quick-thinking Lance lunged toward Tina’s bosom praying he was not too late to suck the West Nile toxin out of her mosquito bite.
Hello i am Dr. Douche and i have a theory… its in the early stages so I may be able to suck the cancer out.. last night I was able to suck the cancer out a snake I found under the table. its salty
I can scratch it with my chinstrap
Lets play pass the herpes
Sarita on the right there is delicious.
yes ladies, i work for the TSA and this is part of the pre-screening
“But but but the snake bit my ankle…”
For one night only, the Las Vegas Philharmonic is pleased to welcome Wilhelm Guernstler, Master of the Raspberry Mammaphone.
“Aw, Yasmin, baby, don’t be like that. I didn’t ask for my cold sores to be shaped like hot chicks. We can just pretend it’s a threesome.”
“Hmmm…nope. I still prefer penis. But thanks.”
“Raspberry Mammaphone” is my band’s new name now.