Monday, May 2, 2011
Thug Island and the Elf Hott
The Scrote Sleuth writes in with the tag:
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This husky vixen cannot resist the brutally sculpted biceps and imposing pecs of this alpha gorilla wannabe. Best case scenario that tat reads “Thug Island”, which ironically is where this throwback would be exiled if crimes against taste ever entered the criminal code. Closer inspection reveals the road in the background is slick with water: rain + shirt off + sunglasses leaves this unfortunate specimen in dangerously douchy territory. Bonus douche points for subtly flexing your triceps while posing.
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I’d put my Peter in her Pan.
Sad but true. He’s the type who’s hypnotised by his own reflection in the mirror. Seen ’em? It’s almost as if they go into some sort of self-loving trance as they slowly move their head and body to take in the full, masturbatory view of themselves from every angle. Kill me now.
That’s Scrotum Gretzky, he plays for the Tug Islanders, NY’s infamous Handjob Hockey team. He squeezes a mean trouser squid.
I’ve always had a thing for strippers named Tinker Belle.
And the geek shall inherit the earth. RUSH 21:12
^And I think as many of you do that he should have been hung up or crucified in a public display at ground zero and left to the devices of Mother Nature and New Yorkers. New Yorkers are so polite they wouldn’t have defiled his body in any way. Would they? Piece of shit was probably wood chipped off the edge of a destroyer with the previous days sausage casings.
It won’t be long before whitey blows more dough on crappy tattoos of olde English script. “All that blank space” By next year,it’ll be affliction styled wings/eagles on the upper arm,or back,a giant cross somewhere,and a dumb heart with Mom on it.
T’was a hairless twitt tatted most wrong
Keestering a large jelly dong
His babe most elfish
Says I’m not selfish
We shove lots of shit up his yong
It looks like Elfin hott might be sporting an impressive rack. I’d let her wield my +2 meatsword.
Tastiest elf since Liv Tyler.
I’d like to squeeze her keeblers.
Chick to the right looks like she may have escaped from White’s dungeon…or was run over during the tractor pull.
I fucking hate it when a picture causes me disequilibrium in my bowels. Do you take this or do you take that? The worst is today when I have constipated explosive diarrhea, All the running and pushing and hemorrhoids and blood. Mixing my beer with Koapectate and Metamucil is fucking disgusting. Gas, twisted colon, butt plugs, I don’t know how the girls take the poopy ride in the hiney with a pained sphincter but then again I don’t care. But there is a bright side to this. When the diarrhea is so constipated that when released it fires like a bottle rocket and my neighbours don’t have screens.
I’m pretty sure she’s supposed to be either a naughty Peter Pan or Robin Hood. I’m all for it. Steal from the douche and give to the whore is what I always say. When I’m whoring it up and I need cash, usually.
@Rev.Kroeger –
I had that for a long time – then I figured out I’m lactose intolerant. You might want to do a little experiment, like EAT / DRINK NO DAIRY at all for a week, then guzzle a glass of milk. If you boat up and get a bad case of the jet powered liquishits, you prolly have lactose intolerance.
Once while walking through the forest searching for psilocybin mushrooms, I came across a Pixie hiding behind an old oak stump.
And by “came across” I mean it literally because I ejaculated prematurely.
.
BTW DB1, hows about some pictures of handicapped chicks.
Wheelchairs, walkers and prosthetic limbs can be quite provocative.
Ren Fair, Hoboken NJ style. The difference is subtle, but you know it isn’t Jersey City because cuz there appears to be trash INSIDE the trash can. Whitey Unigoggle rolls a mean 50 sided die. His Barbarian / Ass-Sorcerer is inseparable from his Nymphomaniacal Wood Elf sidekick. AD&D porn edition rule set, son.
No idea why she is dressed like that, but I just realized I have a naughty little elf fetish.
I’m not convinced his tatt reads “Thug Island”. I’m betting it reads “Tug is my job”. On his back it says “Insert coin into slot and then proceed to the front”.
He also seems a little pissed that he called dibs on the Tinkerbell outfit but Miss Naughty Blonde got to it first. Looks like somebody convinced him to go as a douche instead.
I believe it reads “Thug Issue” as all ‘bangers’ receive a white boy like this to punk when entering the Pitchess Honor Farm
in re: elfin hott, her look says, “ever been blown by a leprechaun?”
I’d snort pixie dust off her ass cheeks.
@fatness
Good eye, but Medusa and I don’t leave marks. Not the kind you can see, at least.
Elven hott looks underage. so does Thug Island.
but in the name of political incorrectness, i’d do horrible things to both of them.
I think the Pixie bitch is giving me Mayan Eye of Coitus…going to be hard to collect from here in Afghanistan.
Are we sure it’s actually “Thug Island” and not “Tug Island”?
There is no doubt in my mind that his “tattoo” is drawn on with a Sharpie marker.
Also, I am somewhat perplexed that neither of them seem at all concerned about the zombie sitting on the bench behind them.
I think the tatt says, “A Bug Is Fine Too”
The tattoo says “such is life”. It is the douche stamp that all Australian douches have, made famous by king of the douches in Aus, Ben Cousins. Apparently they were the last words Outback Outlaw Ned Kelly spoke before he was killed.