Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Vin Douchal brings back The Wednesday Limerick!
Yeah, baby…Limericks are BAAAACK!
Jill asks for help from this schmoe,
Needs SPF where her reach doesn’t go;
Sure, I’ve got my own lotion
And with this subtle motion
I’ll slather you from head to toe
Where no man would fear to woo,
Jill has boobies and nice pooch too.
With swift kicks to the nads,
I dispatch Jim and his lads
And fucck Jen where she likes to go poo.
She likes it when its hard.
She likes it in her backyard.
Monkey boy is proof
That sometimes she likes a goof.
And will blow her neighbour Bob, the retard.
Billy’s a very sad mister,
Who likes to play with his sister.
He’s always a ball,
When he has a grand maul.
And prepares to violently fist her.
There once was a bagling named Dave
Who liked to go frolic and rave
But then he met Daddy’s girl Jen
Who liked to fuck big stupid men
So now he’s part of the megaDouche Wave.
By the pool this pudwhack named Ted,
Cavorted while trippin’ on meds,
And since his arm was so sweaty,
And the girl wasn’t ready,
He dropped her straight down on her head.
Down by the pool partyin’ hard,
Cindy jumps any douche bag o’ lard
So she had Butt Botox
And got her own show on Fox;
The name’s “Dancing With The Tards”
Making a scene by the pool,
Terri humps this pale looking tool;
Todd’s outlook is good
As he pees through his wood;
Now her butt’s not empty, it’s full!
Though she’s all flirty and stuff
Please don’t let him near her muff
Catastrophe diverted
He’s already squirted
Proving he’s a douchebag cream puff
God bless you admin DarkSock
For bringing this tool to mock.
Making us wish harm to all
And forcing us to Tarmal.
I’d like to put my foot in his rear dock
I’m loving this limerick
Her thick middle I’d certainly lick.
After removing the stain
with a backhoe and a crane
her untrussed taco would be the next pick
Hey ! MC 900 Foot Douchebag! We’re over here!
While all the kiddies in the pool did play,
Jill jumped up with legs in filet
So Johnny grabbed a grip
to make sure Jill did not slip
And gave her the DarkSock bidet
Her cans are unnaturally high.
As if surgeon’s baseballs she did buy
But I am still aroused
If she’ll just get deloused.
Cause she’s touching a Turd of a guy.
The pale white Choad in the hat.
Has grabbed a blonde hott with no tat.
I’m glad limericks are back
As I stare at her rack.
And hope the Haiku is similarly phat.
Dry humping Jill near the pool
Jim hangs ten like a fool
But she will drop with a “thud”
When he sees her monthly blood
Down his leg and his tool…
I can’t get over her cans.
Or boobies, or melons, or mams.
I am stuck on the stripes.
Like a Frenchman to tripes.
And I want to wax them so gently with my hands!
Peeing in Jill like a horse
Ol’ James considers the source
If he does it just right
The flaps stay real tight
making for good intercourse
Kicking off her high-heeled sandals
Jill grabs Jim by the love handles
He starts for his hose
But gets distracted and must pose
Jim is your garden-variety Douche!
Hott Jenny got drunk by the pool
and got fondeled by this seismic tool
by the end of the week
her drawers badly reek
and her cooch wil discharge green ooze
oh Jenny so buxom and tan
how’d you end up with the pool man
if you insert his peen
you must douche with chlorine
if you ever want a non-toxic man
ma & pa thought Jenny was pure
but now they are not so sure
after witnessing Grover
roll their daughter over
and savagely part her butt fur
This hott has been dangled over her beer.
By a GSR douche who’s probably queer.
What looks like a good time.
Will lead to crotch slime.
And she’ll turn in to a Bleeth, I fear.
Jill is home for the summer
Brandon got fired from Jiffy Lube what a bummer
A quick 3 month fling
VD it will bring
And a love-child even dumber
This douche has beads, a cross, and tags(?) on his neck.
Its a trifecta of douche worse than a poo fleck.
He needs a bat
to crash down on his hat.
Its a good first step to cleaning this deck.
Vin, what the hell happened? I was the first post here and it has since disappeared. Not that I mind, it was terrible. My haiku is better. Anyways… I enjoyed this Tweet…
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FATJEW The Fat Jew
Guy Fieri is proof that Ed Hardy has started manufacturing actual human beings.
21 Mar
Jenny has Ta-Ta’s, I say.
They invite us to come out and play.
But a Douche got there first.
Making this scene turn for the worst.
Let’s just hope he gets stung by a Ray.
@ MC 9 –
You went to the other-worldly dark side, where I thought only Scrotato and I had been. There are only 4 posts there. As a shape shifter, I have retrieved your post! Sorry!!
Jill wears a bikini to show off her belly
Angle might be hiding that it shakes like jelly
Schmoe is dating above his station
Blows 8 months pay on this vacation
When he gets home has to sell the telly
.
I should stick to haiku.
“Excuse me,” I said to this twit,
“I can’t help but notice your tits.
The game has been stalled,
because we lost our ball,
and you have a nice pair that fits.”
A doughy, hand-sign making dork
wooed a bint with platforms of cork
I came swinging a bat
in the desperate hope that
these two would have no chance to pork.
This has been the best week in a long, long time. Thanks, everyone!
All:
If you click on the pic and then post, it goes to an alternate location. Try it, and you’ll find some posts there. Something is not working right with the site over the past couple of days. I chalk it up to Darksock having peed in something important, like the server.
^Is there anything that guy won’t pee in?
a toilet
a camel?
On the show “Dancing With The Sharts”
This group, my good vibe, doth bogart
This douchie Bra!dah
Unveils the Lambada
And his scrotal disease he imparts.
Tis a hottie and a douchie comingling
‘Twixt crabby twat and warty ding-a-ling
They’ll make some babies
That all have scabbies
And become a family sharing genital sting.
This douche is raping his sawhorse
Which makes sense to Darksock of course
But wailing on wood
With flaccid manhood
Makes for some mighty splintery intercourse.
she’s a bag full o’ giggles & jelly
he’s IQ challenged & smelly
he’ll sting in his thing
an aria she’ll sing
as they grunt like ourangs rubbing bellys
This douchebag with very big glasses
Lays out Jen with tits as big as her ass is
She could make me splooge from my tool
And fill up that pool.
If she’d only chop off and cast his.
A jaded young hott from Phlox
Set dynamite off in her box.
When asked the sensation,
She screamed with elation,
“It’s better than elephant cocks!”
I still can’t get over her cans
If they were racetracks they would be the LeMans
I’d like to have so many bams
of my cheeks between her two mams
Just before I fondled ‘er with my two hands.
There once was a bagling named Dix.
He had the secret for picking up chicks.
If you balance them this way.
They’ll fall under your sway.
But the ubiquitous red cup shat bricks.
Copied from the alternative universe that Dark Sock likely has The Chief consigned to:
Yep HCwDS. I like it.
.
Hey, I’m a huge fan of the guy that used to run this site. But that whole MTV thing, ya know?
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That’s life. I’m sure he anticipated this could happen. He’ll be fine. Or maybe he’ll Ho Ho himself to death. Either way. Whatever.
This guy with the IQ of Gump
Just stood there like a douche lump
His cute little date
Got tired of the wait
So she decided to start to dry hump
Fraud Dog Tags Rosary beads,
At poolside Douchebag needs,
White studded belt,
Black tilted cap,
While the hottie has natural C’s.