Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Grease Witherspoon

Sunglasses Inside.

Body grease.

Dozens of giggle hotts gaggling around some dude who just got fired from the Goldman-Sachs “Interns for Assholes” training program.

There’s a formula for this wrongness. And it involves investment banking.

I see you, Patricia In the Lime Green Bikini. Your radiant smile smites all molds, spores and fungi and makes pillows and laundry extra fluffy. And so I talk to you about your affections for Bud Light Lime. And even drink one. Which is as far as I can sell out for additional chances to see some inner boobal cleavite while you’re distracted when the D.J. plays “All the Single Ladies.”

# posted by douchebag1
1:38 pm June, 8 Mandouchian Candidate said...

I would castrate a belgian blue if it meant I could sniff striped hotts bedsheets.

1:39 pm June, 8 DarkSock said...

Peaches?

1:40 pm June, 8 Mandouchian Candidate said...

There is something off about gil in the Pink. What is it? I can’t quite put my finger on it.

1:40 pm June, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

From left to right: hit it, pass, pass, hit it, hit it.
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NB: I need help. I have a quandery. My Dad just gave me a Cadillac from 7 years back to ride soon when my medical suspension lifts. If I put a Greatful Dead sticker on it, is it: gay, ironic, funny, hipster, or douche. Thank you for your assistance, I have to go pick it up now. Son. And I’m stoned.

1:42 pm June, 8 DarkSock said...

Pink Girl’s face is 2″ too small. That’s it.

1:47 pm June, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Patricia’s taste in men is the same she has in beer; shitty.

1:48 pm June, 8 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

Biff the intern looks like he is about 3 months preggers. suck it in buddy, there’s hotts to be had.

1:50 pm June, 8 Ultra Bagnus said...

Purple stripey hott’s body is crying out for attention. And not from Grease, because all he can give her is, well, grease.

1:56 pm June, 8 Greg said...

The woman had some amazing weight-loss results.

1:57 pm June, 8 DarkSock said...

Forget Bob Greasy, ladies; come ride with DarkSock in his pimp ass truck.
qwer

2:06 pm June, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

@ Rev. Chad 1:40
Funny. Because you (and I) are old enough to get the reference. It’s not ironic because that song came out way before hipsterfags started calling everything ironic, and they don’t even know what ironic means anyway. And it would only be gay if it were a pink triangle sticker. BONUS: Anyone under 25 who does get the joke will be outraged because “It’s supposed to be a Black Flag sticker! Stupid old people! He’s probably never even HEARD of The Ataris!” As if the average Ataris fan has heard of Black Flag before they heard this.

2:07 pm June, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Patrick Bateman is only hanging out with Ms. Pink Cover-Up because his freezer is empty.

2:07 pm June, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

…and THAT, boys and girls, would be the ironic part.

2:07 pm June, 8 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The right side of this infield is HOF material. Limey Giggle Hott doesn’t always drink beer, but when she does, she drinks Douche Equis.
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College girls getting breast implants…whatta country…

2:09 pm June, 8 Medusa Oblongata said...

Damn you, Bunsen, getting in on my gorgon-on-gorgon action.
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So! Anyone in this thread high? I mean, reeeeally, reeeeeeally high? good.

2:14 pm June, 8 Vin Douchal said...

What I’m thinking about striped bikini right now is ilegal in 27 states, but a right of passage in Yemen

2:20 pm June, 8 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Greatful dead bumpersticker would be a slap in Don Henleys GSR
^
Now a Grateful Dead bumpersticker would be just the ticket for a used Caddie. Now go smoke some, ya hippiebag!

2:38 pm June, 8 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Striped hott could be sitting on an ant covered pile of chicken skin on the floor of a waffle house kitchen and I would still go down on her.

2:47 pm June, 8 Stephanie said...

Well,he’s ready to be deep fried,at least…

2:52 pm June, 8 creature said...

wanna be inside sunglasses hott…yum!

3:09 pm June, 8 Hermit said...

After suffering damage from a rather extensive tapeworm infection, I was forced to trade my beloved ’97 Cadillac for a partial spleen transplant and two bottles of Wild Irish Rose.
.
.
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It had an NRA sticker one of those “coexist” bumper stickers on it from the previous owner.
.
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And a pine tree air freshener.

3:14 pm June, 8 Hermit said...

^ I never could open the trunk, but it smelled like Street Gang Retribution on warm days.

4:16 pm June, 8 Whoop-Di-Douche said...

Whither thou goest spooning, it is good to spoon-feed porch beef to bikini-clad boobie-bellistas.

4:26 pm June, 8 Douchble Helix said...

That’s a lot of hottie goodness right there.
.
Neighbor brought over some ‘shrooms late last night. ‘They’ were out to get me while I slept. Somehow, I survived.

4:39 pm June, 8 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

“Damn you, Bunsen, getting in on my gorgon-on-gorgon action.” Is it somehow wrong that I’m wildly aroused by this?

5:03 pm June, 8 tall guy said...

Should my delusion every materialise, stripey blondee is my pick. Closely followed by brunette on right. Blusey floozie on left isn’t too shabby either. But then, I recently considered making an appointment with a manicurist just to feel the touch of a woman so what would I know?

5:16 pm June, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Grateful Dead sticker it is. I wonder if Ataris ever heard the original before they were pitched? They did a decent job of slashing up a redo of a piece of Americana. I may still be oxymoronic since it is an Escalade which I don’t need but it will have a drug and alcohol sensing ignition interlock so it’s height will prevent clients from seeing my shame. Rollins was always a hoot. Sons and Daughters.

5:19 pm June, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Damn neighbourhood kids’ band is getting so loud I have to go join them with my stash.

5:24 pm June, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

This greased up used Cadillac salesman better ask stripey and greeny how they stay so trim. He could probably fit into one of those “Baby On Board” shirts.
.
@RevChad, If you want to woo the late 30s to 40s soccer Mom hotts I say, Go for it. Its funny as long as you wait for them to notice it instead of pointing it out. If you point it out…douchey.
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@Hermit, sorry bout your spleen. Son.
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@tall guy, sometimes I go through airport security, just to feel the touch of a mannish woman. Hang in there.

5:27 pm June, 8 ehcuodouche said...

Striped bikini has crazy eyes but is by far the hottest. You might have to change your cell phone number afterward but it would be totally worth it. Just make sure you go to her place afterward.

5:37 pm June, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

@nancy d
.
I am happily married thank you. I roll with older chicks than that and I hate fucking soccer. For your pleasure I include this shot. And three of those chicks are undeniably young and hot.
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http://www.gawker.com/5809909/anthony-weiners-cock-shot-emerges

5:38 pm June, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

@ehcuodouche, Amen to that. Preach on.

5:43 pm June, 8 Nancy Dreuche said...

RevChad 5:37p, Thanks for the johnson jpg. And I agree with your assesment of the hott chicks above. We’re finally getting along.

7:31 pm June, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Rev
I got tons o high quality Grateful Dead Bootlegs if you’re interested. You might want to check out some of their Canadian forays.
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P. N. E. Coliseum, Vancouver, BC, 5-17-1974
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Kingswood Music Theater, Maple, ON, 6/30/87 (Great show & Tripped balls)

7:37 pm June, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

Striped Bikini calls to me and by calls to me I mean man I’d love do naughty things to her fun bags.

7:41 pm June, 8 Et Tu Douche? said...

@Rev
This would be a cool concept for a bumper sticker
http://www.psilo.com/dead/showshow.php?band=1&date=1987-6-30

8:38 pm June, 8 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I’m stoned so all I have to say is if you listen and understand my work here is progressing. Wow!
.

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I can’t understand myself 1 minute later. Wow! Old school Dead skull. I need a chauffeur. Son .But I don’t think I can really afford it long term. Fucking pharma! It is almost midnight and I am excitingly stoned out of my mind instead of mellow. Son.
.

8:55 pm June, 8 The Dude said...

Boobies! Striped booberinies! They make me feel drunk. Well, I am technically drunk already, but w(*)(*)w!!

9:02 pm June, 8 The Dude said...

@Chad K — nice credits. Didja do that, or were you just — erm, breaking wind?

9:04 pm June, 8 The Dude said...

Fun just became a six-letter word: S-T-R-I-P-E

Count ’em. Six.

9:30 pm June, 8 The Dude said...

Striped boobies are more like (=*=)(=*=)

11:51 pm June, 8 Jacques Doucheteau said...

What the H? This much shirtless male greasery and Dos Equis in the presence of such savory young fruit is a capital offense.
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Mmmmm. Mangoes.

11:52 pm June, 8 Jacques Doucheteau said...

( . ) ( . )

11:58 pm June, 8 Jacques Doucheteau said...

…( . ) ( . )
…. /
…..| * |
…./ /
…| V |
… | /

2:51 am June, 9 Collaz B.P. said...

Cocck ring bikini crazy eyes and Lime Bikini make the world go round.

6:11 am June, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

Apropos of nothing, How bout them B’s?? this series is going 7

6:12 am June, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

^ Son!!!
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Oh and FU wordpress I don’t type that quickly.
“You are posting comments too quickly. Slow down.”

6:27 am June, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

Lime Green Patrica’s GSR is outstanding
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Stripped bikini Hott’s B(@)(@)Bs still call to me.
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Girl in pink with huge farm fresh country naturals may no be much of a looker but I bet she’s down for all sorts of naughtiness.

6:30 am June, 9 Et Tu Douche? said...

Anyone? Hello!! Uncle Sock? Rev? Hermie?

6:32 am June, 9 Mandouchian Candidate said...

I agree ETD? Usually those chicks just try a little harder to make up for their shortcomings. Anyone with a barnyard fetish would certainly be right in Squashedface Pinks wheelhouse.

6:32 am June, 9 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Next!

7:16 am June, 9 I R A Darth Aggie said...

The four hotts, I wouldn’t kick out of my bed. Especially if all four were there together. Might be a tad crowded, but I would soldier on.
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The douche, I’d kick him in the nuts. Cause he deserves it.

7:24 am June, 9 Douchebag#613 said...

I’m disappointed: no scissor gang mafia flashes…

And I’ll quote Johnny from Mad Max:

WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE, BRONZE!!!!

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