Tuesday, October 25, 2011
It’s a Hard Knock Life for DJ
Ever think about what it’s like to be a celebrity D.J?
One minute you’re cranking up the iTunes pre-set playlist and pretending to do things with record players on a stage over thousands of sweaty state-school giggle hotties with limited vocabulary and sweaty poochle thighs.
The next, you’re selling your sphincter for crack beads and vending machine hot pockets outside a boarded up Woolworths off Interstate 5 and hoping there’s a sale on Cup O’ Soup at the local Big Lots.
And the painted ponies go up and down…
Three threes don’t make a nine. Mathematicians.
Nothing to see here, move along.
Another fucker stealing my Halloween costume. Are we still doing that DB1? Huh? Huh? Fuccing DJ’s.
That one in the front reminds me of a Gloucester Canary.
So little time, so many daddy issues.
From “Disc Jockey” to “Dick Jockey”, selling sphinc to dirty old men at truck stops tooling for anus.
.
It has been this way since the days of the Pilgrims.
^@ Medusa: That looks like Whoopi Goldberg’s cooch.
do they also get to play ping pong with big ol saggy tatas?
the head trauma unit always gets the skankiest nurses
Middle hott looks okay. Hall of Okay anyone?
“selling your sphincter for crack beads and vending machine hot pockets” Isn’t that the title of Andy Dick’s new autobiography ?
Lefty ain’t that bad either. Until she starts talking.
Righty looks like she would be a real hellcat in the sack. Grrrrrr…animal prints.
NIce one, Db1. Take no prisoners where those no-talent hacks are involved.
as anyone in Cali knows, it is simply “the 5” – I would think you’d know this by now, DB1- I’ll assume it’s just for brevity for the non left coast masses.
.
I had quite a few misunderstanding about this when I moved from west to east, as I would not say “interstate” when referencing highways. Everything was a “freeway” as far as I knew.- which everyone was confused about.
.
Unless things have changed, I think Cali still just calls it the 405, the 5, the 10 to the 57, whether or not they are interstatial or even free anymore for that matter.
and knowing is half the battle, kids
I love it when he presses a button and my favorite song comes on. He deserves a BJ for that type of mad skills. I think I may even swallow. I have trouble turning on my car radio and this guy is like Bam. The latest hit from Maroon 5?, no problem. Yayyyyyyy! I mean, Wooooooo!
WE’RE THE MEATMEN AND YOU SUCK!!
TOOLING FOR ANUS.
Recalculating the row:
+3 -9 +3 +3 = 0
Thus, on a net basis, he is of no harm. As long as he always travels with this pack.
Math is fun.
Note the bandana is a sweaty refolded fat chick thong wafting the aroma of week old tuna fish and vagisil.
He wears it proudly as the douchdana bagboy that he is.
This cretin is a sad fucking case of smegma slathered
DB ishness.
Now he wears the mandana over his eyes and sucks whatever is shoved through a hole in the wall.
Kris Humphries’ little brother snuck into Kim’s bachelorette party. It was too much to handle…
@ Darksock—*shudder*