Thursday, November 10, 2011
Piet Mondrian Suffers in the Afterlife
From vanguard artistic movement to a douchebag’s shorts in just under a century.
Next up: 10 Degree Hat Tilt with a bicycle wheel sticking out of the top.
And yes, this is now officially becoming a trend.
Is early 20th Century impressionism the new Ed Hardy?
I always ridicule the shaved forearm look. After seeing this douche’s gross, hairy Magilla Gorilla forearms I have re-evaluated my position. Comely Matilda gives me wood.
When the douche co-opts the final and remaining vestiges of Western Civilization, it is truly a sign that the Lamb is about to open the Seventh Seal.
Embryonic proto-douche, at best. Perhaps the exception that proves the rule: do a six pound watch, hat tilt, and jesus bling make you a douche? Common wisdom is yes, but what if you are a baby-faced peckerwood with peach fuzz instead of facial fung? I dunno the answer, folks, but Piet inspires more pity and despair for humanity than pure douche-fueled outrage for me.
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Hannah unknowingly poses a similar metaphysical quandary. While the Bleethiest hotts are an unholy amalgam of grime and sex appeal; filthy gorgeous as they squander and adulterate their beauty in pursuit of the decadent Bleeth lifestyle; where does that leave Hannah? Not now and probably not ever beautiful, attached to a proto-bag of dubious veracity, can you bring just the filthy and be a Bleeth? I dunno the answer to this one either, folks, I can only raise my glass and bid your drink til you forget.
If that is the case then Jackson Pollock will be in line for a SHORT comeback.
“Life imitating art” is what we see here. Neo-plasticism (or anything close to plastic) is a literal representation of the modern douchebag and/or bleeth: fake boobies, maxed-out parental credit cards, manufactured personalities, etc.
I’d rather be beaten roughly and face-raped by Mary J. Blige on a crack bender than re-visit this post.
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Brothas
I love when people ask to borrow my cell phone. I state, “Sure but I take it with me to the bathroom so it has feces, jizzm and most likely the most sanitary thing on it is my urine. Here ya go….”
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I also love when Piet’s arm hair is singed while stoned-cooking Jiffy Pop. Smells like an Armenian restaurant when the toilet backs up onto the floor
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She looks like my old lady when she was that age. Damn this cocck o’ mine.
Back spasm today has me zonked on Vicodin. I feel akin to The Good Rev. …… YouTube is awesome on Vitamin V
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Jack White should have fronted these gals the money to make a video out of this tune since he added his personal guitar sauce all over it
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For the Vicodin impared:
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Steven Tyler called, he wants his mic stand bandanas back that Ms. Bleethy has wrapped around her thigh.
He’s ‘bag, alright. right down to his can of Bud Light.
And she’s I Dream Of Jeanie.
Shia LaBeoufbag
Reverend Chad likes zaftig. Don’t let him fool you. He likes obese anal as well. Stoner.
Mikey likes pinky porn star lavender love girl.
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.Mikey wonders what she sees in pale, pudwack Petey.
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.Mikey has underestimated the appeal of peach fuzz ‘staches.
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.and melanin-challenged epidermis covering appendages without form or function.
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.Mikey would Van Der Rohe her Kandinsky and Gropius her sweet little Klee in a heartbeat.
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.Johnsons
shit, man. first they take tattoos and ruin them for everyone else. but i’ll be good damned if they are going to take my beloved mondrian and drag his name through the mud. i swear to god, if i see one of these bags with ‘guernica’ or a degas ballerina on their trunks, i’m gonna eat some arsenic. god help the early 20th century geniuses. they are obviously next on the list of things douchebags are going to ruin for the rest of us. fudge it all.
It looks like they just took his arm out of a cast.
This douche has less muscle mass and tone than starving African kids. I’ll bet if he took off the bling, the watch, and the glasses she’d outweigh him by a good 20 lbs. Then she just bitch slaps his ass around to do her bidding. He’s like her overgrown toy chihuahua.
Helix, not to quibble but I believe that is a “silver bullet” coors light he is drinking. He is full blown middle eastern / slavic douche. She has a forced smile, indicating her only interest in his skinny ass is obtaining another paid for $12 tini.
Hey, if you’d rather see something pleasing, click here.
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Some luscious pear and boobies are afoot. Pun intended (because I suck at ’em like that)…..
Nik Richie Fartoonian gets greased by Anderson Cooper tonight about a year after losing an $11 million lawsuit
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Second video at the bottom is classic. “I’m a li-BEAR-eeyun”.
Planet of the high-school apes with dinner plate watches.
Bleh. I’ve seen worse.
@Magnum D – I saw it coming. I was on my tablet with the 10″ screen, and the second I hit the key…
If I see Charles Rennie Macintosh drawers on any of these twats, it’s Tri-state killing spree time.
I think this plaid pants fascination can be attributed to the retro rage for Pendleton wool plaids.
Really.
http://thechive.com/2011/11/08/paulina-gretzky-is-using-the-twitter-machine-properly-34-photos/
I revisstited Pocahantas Pear, then checked out Wheezer’s link,,,,then figured I had to share the above.
I present – Paulina Gretzky. FWWWWWAAAAAAAAPPPPPP.