Friday, February 3, 2012
Friday Haiku
Mr. Jay Louis:
What’d I ever do to you?
This is so harsh, man…
Shake it off, DarkSock…
Just pull it together, Man…
*takes a deep breath, then…*
Jill always wanted
A Chaz Bono Shit Golem;
Now what, Jill? Now what???
or
Not sayin’ Jan’s dumb,
But she clearly cannot tell
Douche from Shinola.
As always, your turn
Awaits in comments section;
Lawd have mercy, Y’all…
-D.S.
Friday is a day
Relished for boobies and mock
Today I just wipe
— saulgoode42
Sad Cathy wonders,
If Al Jolson took a shit,
Would it smell this bad?
— hermit
Double Ducky Lips
Ebony and Ivory
Perfect Harmony
— Wedgie
Shoe polish is for
loafers you silly twit. Come
here, mine need a buff.
— Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche
Douche or bruthabag?
the corner of his eyebrow
(now gone) reveals DOUCHE.
Dyed Brown Diesel Dyke
Looks like Al Jolson hate-fucced
poor Aunt Jemima
Friday is a day
Relished for boobies and mock
Today I just wipe
Sad Cathy wonders,
If Al Jolson took a shit,
Would it smell this bad?
What the motherfuck
Jesus Christ my eyes goddamn
Make the hurting stop
Gross lesbo coupling
Has me searching for a name
Uncle Jemima?
Public Service Plea:
Do not ever make snowmen
Out of brown snow, please
I truly believe
There’s no one in this picture
Who pees standing up.
Well, it’s nice to see
That even the clambumpers
Have douchebag problems
Work place accidents
No laughing matter at the
Tan Bed Tech’s Union
I can’t wait to hear
That fuccen Canadian’s
Take on Mulatta’s
Gulf Coast Architect’s
Design of the Year Award:
Sun-power strap-on.
Double Ducky Lips
Ebony and Ivory
Perfect Harmony
Shoe polish is for
loafers you silly twit. Come
here, mine need a buff.
Dude & Wedgie in
a tie ftw
great job ‘bag hunters!
halloween party
pics don’t belong – no boobies
no hotts, please remove
what the fuck is this?
I’m glad I’m not in Dixie
Minstrel shows aren’t cool
Hey, I have that tie
For about two more minutes
Where’s that can of gas?
Mr. Hankey’s son
takes bleeth on hot date. T.P.
mob ends it quickly.
confused Kristen asks
“what’s miscegenation mean?”
Bob sez “I’ll show you”
These Looney Tunes look
Happy as a pig in shit
Hey wait, nevermind.
“Look to the cookie”
said Jerry for harmony.
Just dissonance here.
jesus fucking christ.
I got nothing
Jan’s jungle fever
was short lived when she found out
Chris has a white root.
Douche Springsteen wonders
does dude look like a lady?
or vice versa? son.
Jan loved Springsteen so
much she dug up Clemmon’s corpse.
Now sax not solo.
Spike Lee’s “Bamboozled”
Combined with “She Hate Me” makes
“Rosemary’s Baby.”
“Look at me, Mammy!
Don’t you know me?” Al’s song
takes on new meaning.
Green Stefany likes dirt
Pink lips, white shirt
But gives no love to Fat Albert
Now you can all see
My brillo haired Leah is a
Fat Mulatto dude.
She hasn’t shined shoes
Since the gyroscope was put
In her monkey hole.
The Reverend Al
Sharpton has always been a
Sharp nappy dresser.
Muhammed Ali
Mourns with his grandbaby girl
Angela Dundee.
Gary Coleman finds love
With midget from Latvia.
Whatchu talking bout!
That Flip Wilson was
One funny fucker. Pucker
Up Geraldine. Son!
Things haven’t been the
Same for Oprah since Gayle left
For another dude.
Avril Lavigne met
This dude last time she did a
Show in Compton.
burnt umber tranny
tucks orange crayon of love
bring on minstrel show
Blackface proclaims “Me
Chinese, me play joke. Dark Sock
Pee-Pee in your coke.”
That black dude is the
Twin sister of that bug eyed
Dude in Predator.
Taken at MLK
Anniversary. New speech
born. “I have a peen.”
Guess Who’s Coming To
Dinner? Her white girlfriend in
Blackface. Ratings gold.
BrothaBag Orange,
For the Loss,
Oh my Eyes!
modern day minstrel?
not just racist: an affront
to all humankind
Cecil Fielder’s
Son celebrates move back
Home with grunk and rape.
We can rest assured
skin tones like this don’t occur
normally on earth.
Stepin’ Fetchit Douche
Sets the movement back decades
For Douches and Brothers
Cries of Racism
Will be drowned out by cries of
He’s a fuccen Douche
Sober(?) Rev’s pretty
goddam funny, too! Who knew
He’s more’n a racist?
Orange we happy?
Blackface outlawed in movies
But douchebags were not
Blackface? Spraytan face?
Whiteface? Duckface? Dr Seuss
has a new poem.
Fucking Dark Sock is Tardos again. And I’m not fucking sober Douchable Helix are you nuts. Friday is study day. No fucking work Friday, Study day. Getting right drunk and working on my thesis “The Transfer Of Wealth From Hong Kong To Canada Before Chinese Nationalization And It’s Effect On The Stability Of The Condominium Market In Canada From 1990- 2012: A Study In Canadian Interest Rates.” I shit you not. You can only write about shit like this because your wife wants you to get a doctorate to be overqualified to work with her when she opens up her own company if you’re fucking ripped on cheap beer and speed. Son
^The Right Reverand Chadwick Kroeger…..PhD?
.
Is it just me, or did the universe just tilt a little?
Jolson wannabe:
“Orange is the new shoeblack”;
same kind of putty.
Poopi Goldberg views
“tan,” duckface as cool; brunette
chick looks like a Ghost
@Wedgie
.
I multi-task. When I sleep I work for a call center in Mumbai. Son.
.
I really started this thesis in 1990 but Mrs. Kroeger fucked it up. It may be completed if I don’t go bonkers again.
jesus horny christ
that thing on the right with the face,
looks like a cakewreck
Doctor Redderick
Orange no longer pulls teeth
Teeth jump out on own
Paging Doctor Socck:
Fuccen slacker; post my shit
Silly architect
literally shitfaced,I can’t do haiku.
Lips light and skin dark –
How the fuck did he do that?
Seriously, dude.
rough day guys, sorry
Jill appears worried
as the angry mob grows large
Beatings will ensue
Your eyes don’t betray,
not a douchebag in drag, but
prom night Al Roker