Monday, April 9, 2012
Props to the 'Sock!
And by “sock,” I mean Marty Puffinmuscle’s impromptu and improvisational adherence to prophylactic need.
Aka the social conventions of discovering birth control methodology via article of clothing in Marty’s van down by the river upon convincing an addled Corrie that she should, like, totally make out with him for a few hours, then watch the sunrise.
Your humble narrator is back from meditative and monastic retreat in Uttar Punjab and ready to fire things up again.
Gotta a hamper full of soiled HCwDB pics ready to fire.
I hope all of your Seders and Seder-ripoffs (Easter) were delightful and macaroon filled. Now lets do this thang.
That chick behind Marty is giving me the East Asian Eye of Tandoori Boobs. And a boner.
Not to disagree with my bosom buddy Rev, but I think she’s giving the Mud-Person Eye of No-Soup-For-You.
And that’s Patel in back do the Artie Johnson, “Verrryyyy Interesting” thing.
Actually, that’s Patel Kimmel.
Patel Kimmel FTW
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But he’s squinting like that because Marty’s hair keeps jabbing him in the eyes . The pointy sting of Axe hair gel and fail hurts. A lot
Welcome back DB1. I’d like to Uttar Punjab big boobied Ms. Patel.
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what ?
For all we know, that was The Chief doing them sly moves in Uttar Punjab.
Patel Kimmel! That’s funny son! Son.
And I was remiss in not offering my highest praise for Dark Sock. Huzzah! Huzzah, I says.
Yes, Kudo’s to Sock for his pearfection this past week.
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@Rev
Seeing as Ottawa won’t be playing the defending Stanley Cup champions in the first round I assume the our friendly wager is null & void. I likes me some gambling so if you got another wager let me know.
These lovely young ladies don’t know it yet, but they yearn for a once over by my close compadre, Hamfist the Butthole Punisher.
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What that Hamfist (putting fist up to ear)? What’s that you say? You wish to push their stool back in? Indeed, Hamfist (nodding approvingly). Indeed.
Hamfist sez he’s willing to go a round with these douchebags too. For Hamfist swings both ways.
Apparently I WAS able to make that six foot shot from behind the bar onto the back of green dress’ neck. Hmmmm. Somebody owes me some money.
You see,kids,this is why you shouldn’t be eating the lead paint from window sills.
Marty just scored the most kickass prank of his life right here. “Yeah bro, I like totally ripped a huge fart right in front of these jellies! Fuck yeah, man, it stunk bad from my 3-day old underwear and Taco Bell trots! Check it out – they’re all like totally pissed! HAHA!”
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Of course, Jennifer Love Spewitt to the left of the pic just got a whiff, while Corrie in back is quietly horrified.
Crap, I almost forgot how to spell my stupid name. Hopefully tall guy has moved on and is banging as many wrinkly shouldered broads as he can. I figured I’d make my official triumphant return just in time for DB1 to come back from his week off, er “walkabout”. DB1, DarkSock was fantastic, more butt pics than you could shake your stick at. Now I don’t really expect you to follow suit since you’re more into punishing us for Bob knows what happened to you as a kid (my official guess is Childhood Rickets) but if you could not totally harsh the serious mellow I’ve got going off of last weeks awesomeness I would be much obliged muchacho. Welcome back, I can’t wait to continue the fight of making fun of dudes that are boning ladies you, yourself would like to bone. What can I say, its my one selfless public service I do for you people. And finally, I missed you too CB Popped. I know you have a round Hawaiian girlfriend but hopefully there is a 1/32nd of your heart that belongs to me.
^round=rotund
Looks like Brobag Marty pooted on the bleeth.
easter a seder ripoff. least funny thing i’ve read on this site in years. (and i haven’t been to church since the first bush administration). kind of a downer.
Hamfist the Butthole Punisher?
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Yeah, that’s my new stage name.