Friday, July 13, 2012
Friday the 13th Haiku
Family reunion
Gets awkward when Todd wears jeans
And sports unshaved balls
~or~
Then from Jack’s blue jeans
The midget burst out, yelling
“THE ARISTOCRATS!!!”
~or~
We’re here to answer
That CraigsList ad by some guy:
“Baron Von Goolo…?”
The pasties don’t move
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole
— The Reverend Chad Kroeger
At the strip club it’s
“Bring your brother to work day”.
Todd thinks, “Dumb idea.”
— Troy Tempest
Kim Kardouchian
Has new reality show
“Me and Four Losers”
— DoucheyWallnuts says
Mamas and Papas
Tribute band Fails Cal. Dreamin’
with Cleveland Steamin’.
— Franklyn DealorNo Doucheifelt
Jeans guy says “I got
yer fuccen package right here.”
God loves blonde hotties.
Ta Ta’s in Gold, Red.
Douchebags in Groin Shave Reveal.
I am conflicted.
See the shirtless guy?
Don’t look twice! Your face will melt!
Just like in Raiders
The pasties don’t move
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole
Brutus “Buffer” Beef
Cake is disturbed with Tom Cruise’
Thetans up his bung
Hey John Largemoob
Did you lose yer fuccen shirt?
Did Baron Von Goo???
Come on every bo
Dy baby do the Moo Cow!
Brutus has dullards.
The Flying Boobies
Celebrate as they cross the
From gay to tranny.
The Gillette Razor.
It’s not just for cocks and balls
Anymore homo.
Following porn flick
principal photography
cast, producer chill.
In the Tour de France
This group is a Peloton
Here is Poo-o-ton
The Gillette Razor.
It’s not just for areola
And dragqueens anymore.
The Gillette Razor.
Does anybody just fucking shave
Their face anymore?
The Gillette Razor.
Shaving chests and bungholes since
1931.
Cast of new movie,
‘Nipple Wars’ meets the Head of
Moob/Boob Compliance
The ghost of Phoebe
Snow laments on stage. “Who’s the
Ugly Duckling Now.”
And for our next trick
Brutus will perform anal
Kegels on Todd’s head.
The finalists from
“America’s Got Herpes”
Don’t look too happy
Party for pasties
Girl as she stars in “Waiting
To Exhale: Air Tight.”
Phyllis Dilldo on
Right waits for turn to wisecrack
About Brutus peen.
Brutus’ act in troupe
Exposed by haircut. Performs
As Bustin Bieber.
I’m done. Need to put
Pasties on daughters for Three
Ring Diving Compet…..
It puts the pasties
On it’s big fake boobs. Put the
Pasties on your boobs!
At the strip club it’s
“Bring your brother to work day”.
Todd thinks, “Dumb idea.”
Kim Kardouchian
Has new reality show
“Me and Four Losers”
Fag Bag on the left
Is jealous of the fake tits
Wants to get implants
New Olympic Sport
Douchebag Human Sacrifice
Everyone wins (loses)
This picture smells like
Valtrex, axe, anal leakage
And made me throw up
Mamas and Papas
Tribute band Fails Cal. Dreamin’
with Cleveland Steamin’.
Cleopatra and her trogladytes
Stole Jakob the Amsterdam rigger’s shirt
Held it and Pastey Paulie to ransom at Reno Oasis
Stoikovich’s High Flying Bumpah Band
were mildly grateful for Fellipe’s stand in tour bus
Except when Boriso was required to bunk in his bunk
The glazed moulded cherries in the the Royal Niagra forecourt’s fruit basket
reminded Mikey of how overpowering the sight of a masectomy could be
Rocky Horror Show,
Twilight mashup goes awry
Will her tassles spin?
A shirtless ogre
and three showgirl succubi?
That would be a score.
aristocrats, by far…WINNAH!
I like the boob tassels on number 2 there. Bet she can make them go round and round like propellers.