Thursday, December 6, 2012

Joey The Creepy Kid You Went to Basketball Camp With Mugs Hannah

Joey, The Creepy Kid You Went to Basketball Camp With, is all grown up now.

He lives in the garage over his parents house in Dix Hills, Long Island.

He works in a paint store.

He saves up for the weekends, where he blows all his cash on tattoos, Bud Light Limes, and betting the over on the Brooklyn Nets.

Sexy Mayan-Eye-of-Coitus Hannah may be in community college in Great Neck, but her dream to become a costume designer for Broadway shows (a dream ever since she first saw Avenue Q in high school) is still very much alive.

Or at least it was.

Because Hannah’s father, Mr. Glickenfeld, has fallen down on the father job because he’s been overworked at the office and tired lately.

And Joey’s taken advantage.

There’s not much we can do to stop this atrocity, except for mock from a safe distance. And hope Hannah takes that roommate share on the UWS asap.

# posted by douchebag1
8:39 am December, 6 Ferris said...

Is he drinking a fuccen Zima??

No, no … I stand corrected. It’s a Smirnoff Ice.

9:07 am December, 6 Ich verstehe sie ist heiß said...

Ever meet a great-looking girl that you’re really into, you go out a few times, everything is going great, and then she tells you she has herpes?

.

This is how that happens.

9:12 am December, 6 Justin Timberbag said...

This just in: Ashley Sky is a hot chick

http://ashleysky.tumblr.com/

She is dangerously close to bleethdom, but still has a few good weeks left in her.

9:12 am December, 6 Tits McGee said...

@Ferris –

Though I could be wrong, and often am, I think that’s some sort of Bacardi Silver product… either raspberry or strawberry.

I have to agree. Some girls are just too trusting and then they get branded for life. For this reason I sometimes think the age of consent should be raised to 23.

Other times I feel like it should be lowered from 18…

…did I type that out loud?

9:16 am December, 6 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Nothing says Happy Hanukkah quite like a blue tumbler from $5 Below filled with Skinny Bitch Margarita and a chugging from a bottle of Smirnoff Ice or Zima.

9:19 am December, 6 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“Alex, I’ll take, ‘What the Fuck is That Tattoo on His Chest?’ for $200.”

.

What is a Tribble?

9:21 am December, 6 DoucheyWallnuts said...

“Alex, I’ll take, ‘What the Fuck is That Tattoo on His Chest?’ for $200.”

.

What is the U.N.’s logo?

9:37 am December, 6 Choad the Douche Sprocket said...

I caught a case of the crabs from a spinner just like Hannah once,

.

.

Now I know how it happened.

9:42 am December, 6 Ich verstehe sie ist heiß said...

‘What is the creature from the black lagoon, Alex’

10:15 am December, 6 DarkSock said...

‘What is Courtney Love’s asshole, Alex’

10:17 am December, 6 DarkSock said...

Every douche leech like this should be forced to submit a photo to this aging software, designed to scare one into starting a retirement account:

.

http://faceretirement.merrilledge.com/

10:18 am December, 6 The Dude said...

Sergio Leone’s final film, the unreleased “Once Upon a Time in New Jersey” starred Bob DeNiro’s bastard son Guero DeNiro. Bob intends to have him buried under the intersection of Atlantic and Flatbush in Brooklyn.

.

Nyets

11:17 am December, 6 DarkSock said...

Hi, Nancy

12:04 pm December, 6 Reverend Chad channeling John Bonham's Spirit said...

Nancy Dreuche has the cunt that swallowed 10,000 ships. I mean made a few people puke when they saw her moss covered labia and prolapse colon.

.

Tits McGee

12:10 pm December, 6 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

AC/DC is up next to get us warmed up for the Douchies. They dedicate this song to Nancy Dreuche in “celebration” of her return. Bon Scott loved moldy labia smeared with melted Velveeta and pickled prolapses. Live from Coventryshire in beautiful goatfucking Wales.

.

.

Son.

12:17 pm December, 6 Capt Canuck said...

When I first saw this photo the first words that popped into my head were “bad choices”.

.

Tits Mcgee @9:12… technically in Canada the age of consent is 16, but that’s not something I would care to test myself, either in a courtroom or her father’s living room.

1:05 pm December, 6 Wheezer said...

He lives in the garage over his parents house in Dix Hills, Long Island.

.

Then his full name is Joseph Arturd Fungzarelli.

1:57 pm December, 6 hermit said...

I often wonder what atrocity Nancy must have committed to have her name struck from the HÔM. Was it a callous and purposeful act of punishment or a simple oversight?

It is not for us to question the tortured thought process of The Machine.

I was in the grocery store today and saw the faces of Medusa, Mr. White, Wedgie and Dr. Bunsen on milk cartons.

I fell to my knees and wept openly.

I saw Crucial Head’s image on a pack of fig newtons.

11:06 pm December, 6 Little Willie said...

Joey looks like the kid at basketball camp who was routinely sodomized in the showers by the older camp counselors. He was the kid who enjoyed it. Hannah has the blank stare of the brainless air head who consumed too many roofie spiked drinks.

11:57 pm December, 6 Stephanie said...

Hannah will breed with Joey,and make little children that come out with olive oil,red sauce and noodles all over them. I can just sense these things.

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