Friday, February 8, 2013
Friday Haiku
The ‘Sock Lost at sea,
Douche and Bleeth to the rescue,
800-Lip-Herp.
– Management
For her – Same ol’ thing:
A bunch of buzzing noises
Down between her knees.
Tough economy
forces pimps to flagrant means
of advertising.
— Douche Wayne
Ready to call that
number but then realized
it’s for bike, not her.
— Eliza Douchecoo
She has bugs in teeth
Since the gyroscope was put
In her MonkeyHole
— The Reverend Chad Kroeger
The glorious crash
That will ensue fueled by hair
Gel and silicone
— Capt. James T. Douche
They’re living the dream
Moped. Motel Six. Cheap beer.
It’s a real short dream
— Mr. Scrotato Head
Trying to use a
scooter to haul ass is like
farting in windstorm.
— Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche
I like my ass pear
with a heaping side order
of douchebag road rash.
Tough economy
forces pimps to flagrant means
of advertising.
This is a still from
Easy Rider remake with
Douchebag and Bleeth cast
The Rent Me Number
is not Just for the Scooter
Driver for Rent too
Helmets? We don’t need
No steeking helmets! We don’t
Have brains to protect
Easy Rider II
Peter Fonda replaced by
douchebag in capris
I hope she’s got a
Big trunk cause I want to put
my junk up in it
Ready to call that
number but then realized
it’s for bike, not her.
Cock and vibrators
no longer work on Chad’s mom.
Chad’s bike seat is it.
Head-on crash with truck
The hot chick’s life will be spared
He’s a Douche (air) bag.
She has bugs in teeth
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole
The Great Humongous
Switched to chicks after wild kid
Cut his buds head off.
Mad Cax rides into
Distant Apocalypto with
Gas sniifin whore chick.
The glorious crash
That will ensue fueled by hair
Gel and silicone
The lost Vespa tribe
Discovery Channel shows
Mating ritual
He wanted a Vespa.
Forced to ride E-Bike so he
Could pay his tan fees.
This years Sybian
Fits two and has hand mounted
Controls with throttle!
It sounds like dubstep
When he pops the clutch on her
Gas powered dildo
Swells Angels founder
Johnny Cockswain lost all street
Cred riding Mom’s scoot.
His other car is a
Prius currently being
Painted with pink flames.
Popped collar polos
Replace leather and boots at
Sturgis for this year
Three crotch rockets shown:
The bike, her strap-on dildo,
his cheap body spray.
Crushing vag on the
reg really meant braking quick
and without warning.
Miami Beach and
rental scooters get all the
insipid meatwads.
Reminds me of bags
from If you steal my sunshine
90’s Len single.
This circus act has
a clown, a he-she and a
cock ring of fire stunt.
Boobies rub Jack’s back,
Result is hard wood. Jenn will
Provide wraparound.
Thanks for that Bag M.
I wasn’t mad enough from
The snow guy’s no-show.
That video just
gave me a cold. You get no
sympathy from me.
. Her big crotch rocket
avoids cars and common sense
. while he’s on his bike.
Douche would rather drive
Black Trans Am with a T-roof
Not his mom’s scooter
What do you call a
Douche and Bleeth on a scooter?
Great target practice
Oh heavenly pear,
beware! road rash awaits,
in the fall! I prefer my pear,
to have skin intact,
Burma Shave!
Top speed of 40
Fast and the Furious NOT
Hope there are no hills
Bugs between her teeth
Shorts wedged between her butt cheeks
The glamorous life
No helmet, short shorts
Looking good beats being safe
Skid mark either way
They’re living the dream
Moped. Motel Six. Cheap beer.
It’s a real short dream
The engine sounds like
a smooth high pitched fart, that goes
putt putt from her butt.
Ocean side drive by
She flashes leg. He shows guns.
Plow through hotdog cart
two rules broken
of wingback tat bro ethic
fat chick & moped
Ex-UFC guy,
muscular “chick” start taxi,
called it Jim and Jim’s
Roid ‘bag must work out
Between chauffeur gigs on mom’s
Fancy ass Moped
Trying to flee on
scooter doesn’t mean that sins
ever go away.
“Hey baby! Wanna
ride my hog?” asks douchebag. Bleeth
settles for Vespa.
“I’ll just break a leg
if I jump off now” thinks bleeth.
First douchebag jump-off.
The economy
Slow-Douchemobile traded in
Scooter brings your tart
Trying to use a
scooter to haul ass is like
farting in windstorm.
Wakes up and is late
for work at the waffle house
Scooter ride of shame
One stop on the way
Bareback douche hump requires
mourning after pill
Homestead, Florida
Is great place to scout for Bleeths
You’d like to ass fucc
Wings Tatt on his back
Thinks he can fly. Needs more speed
Than Scooter can give
Douche has wings of ink
Instead of feathers and wax
Icarus would weep
Tattoos are result
of rough cougar sex scars, with
jet black nail polish.
Trying to watch road
While she’s giving reach around
Is tough to pull off
Her bod is rockin’
Her face, I am unsure of
He is a loser