Friday, April 5, 2013
Friday Haiku
Get your hands off her
You iPhone becrotched Tarzan;
You damn dirty ape
Father-daughter theme
dances: an invitation
into discomfort.
— Douche Wayne
Hot Hall Contender
Please tell me that’s your gay friend
Who’d like us to meet
— saulgoode42
Underboob beckons
Myan Eye of Coitus shines
My banana splits
— Mr. ScrotatoHead
If I wore loin cloth
My Indian name would be
Chief Raging renoB
— DoucheyWallnuts
Like a Bonobo
I would present my red ass
To father her chimps
— Mr. ScrotatoHead
Tarzan dumped Cheetah
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.
— The Reverend Chad Kroeger
Kevin Spacey douche:
No longer gay since meeting
Teenie Courtney Cox
Who am I kidding?
I’d dress like a damn fool, too
To be with that gal
Father-daughter theme
dances: an invitation
into discomfort.
Hot Hall Contender
Please tell me that’s your gay friend
Who’d like us to meet
Douche and Bleeth cosplay
Is a tragic sight indeed
I want to fling poo!
Underboob beckons
Myan Eye of Coitus shines
My banana splits
She takes the arm band
And wraps it around his neck
Best. Daydream. Ever.
Her boobies make my
Loincloth fit kind of funny
He makes me throw up!
“It’s freezing in here
I think I can smell my taint
but this chick is hot!”
Ring! Ring! Oh, hi mom.
What happened to the den rug?
Yenta cock blocker
This pic is a mess
But I feel most sorry for
iPhone on his junk
Tarzan dumped Cheetah
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Monkey Hole.
Tarzan swings from vines
I would swing from her ham flaps
Lord of the Junk-Hole
I bet she loves to
Have her butthole yodeled on
And so does he too!
It puts the iPhone
In it’s pants or it get’s the
Hose. The Monkey Hose.
Her ham wallet is
The perfect shade of pink, this
Situation stinks!
Person in BG
Is calling the zoo there is
Found an escaped ape!
She certainly does not
Have orangutan tits but
He smells like ape shit!
NAMBLA announces
“Bring Your Sister To Work Day”
That’s the way she rolls.
He sports GCR
AKAGroin Cell Reveal
It’s very lonely
Old bag’s jungle call
“Thank you God, for hot young babes
with daddy issues”
Me Tarzan. Me eat.
Me eat big sausage cock boy.
Why you have boobs, Son?
Dave Matthews looking
Dipshit touches hot, friend in
Back calls zookeeper!
Her phone is hidden
I’d dial it with my tongue
We know where it is
Tarzan-bag and Jane
swing from club to club. Until
his AMEX hits max.
Holy Triangles
Of leopard print seat covers
Where are my scissors?
Cavedouche found alive!
10,000 year old strain of
Herpes discovered!
If I wore loin cloth
My Indian name would be
Chief Raging renoB
If I wore loin cloth
My nickname would be Pup Tent
Big Fuccen Pup Tent
This pic reminds me
I’d like to ream Megan Fox
While that dipshit looks
Father-Daughter Dance
Epic Fail as these two thought
It was Caveman Themed
Dude wearing headband
Is never acceptable
Even to score Hott
Roger Ebert would
have given this scene a big
thumbs down. What, too soon ?
Phone takes pic of junk
Distributes to contact list
New nickname: gherkin
Bo Derek’s “Tarzan”
Was the worst Tarzan ever
Bo can relax now
Like a Bonobo
I would present my red ass
To father her chimps
Hollywood Re-launch
“Gorillaz in the Misty”
Starring Jane Good-hole
Tattoo artist was
drawing intricate design,
spewed when Jane walked in
Side boob,
Bottom boob,
I’ll be in my bunk.
King Ding-A-Ling of
The Taint Cheese Tribe and beboobed
Princess Leopard Snatch
Blonde on phone is mad
Bitch stole her costume idea
But wears it better
Happy Blonde on phone
Jane can have her ex- tarzan
No Chlamydia
Odd Rash on Tom’s Lip
Photo reminds Tom said yes
borrow Tarzan phone
At nudist camp out
Tarzan loses his loincloth
Cell phone us his ass
Orange erection
Bizarrely flattened, protrudes
Coupling a no-go
Siamese twin wonders
“Mounted backward as I am
Will I ever mate?”
Her bad taste in men
Might work to my advantage
Nice to see there’s hope.
Ha – I never knew
People wore tattoos that mean
“Yes, I have the clap”.
Why restrict it to
The Mayan eye of coitus
Whole being screams sex
Hey man, do you have more pictures of her?
She is stunning!
One so rarely sees
The word “becrotched” in haiku —
Hat tip to DarkSock.