Wednesday, July 24, 2013
You Might Be a Doucheneck if…
…you’re this guy.
Jeff Foxworthy, ladies and gentlemen!! How about a hand for Jeff Foxworthy!!
See, I like to mock comedians who rely on one joke premises for their entire careers. Because, uh… oh… wait… dammit.
E I E I O Y’all!
Girls got some mudpuppies on her chest!
You might be a Doucheneck if your mama’s cowboy boots fit you, but smell worse than a dump fire
You might be a Doucheneck if you know the color of this chick’s eyes
You might be a Doucheneck if your gay skinny jeans (TUCKED INTO THE BOOTS, no less) have no Skoal ring
You might be a Doucheneck if you’re dating an asian ladyboy who’s pic has been on this site at least twice before. Just sayin.
That fringe sure plays down her “problem areas”. And by problem areas, I mean him.
You might be a Doucheneck if you wear a denim vest and pose with Paid to Pose Asian Trannies.
That chick has an impossible anatomy.
I’m in love! Can you guys knock it off, please!?!?
Her boobies give me hope. Doucheneck does not.
Gawd-DAMNIT!!!
.
I would staple lead weights to my scrotum and jump up and down for weeks on end, just so that my sac would be stretched out enough that I could sublimely rest a testicle upon each of those shelf-like milk missiles.
Well, I can confirm this is not Mary Mammageddon. This is some Japanese American named Arika Sato.
I don’t care if it’s a tranny (respect), I’d hit it (no homo). The best spinners have the rib shelves so you can get them spinning at top RPM more easily.
.
I would eat a back yard full of dried-white dog shit chopstick-style using dirty pool cues whilst being pelted with used gorilla tampons just for the privilege of thumping her dog’s tits.
bet that gal can holster some cocxxxcksxxx