Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Breaking: Drunk Frenchbags Steal and Molest a Llama

drunkwithllama2

The latest from France:

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A pack of blitzed French school chums snatched Serge the llama from a circus and led the surprisingly agreeable beast on a late-night journey aboard the city of Bordeaux’s tram system.

The llama-nappers posted pictures of themselves with Serge on Twitter, leading to their arrests on misdemeanor theft charges. They’ll likely get a wrist-slapping fine.

“I had two or three glasses too much. Let’s say I was happy,” one of the animal liberators, Mathieu, 20, told the Sud-Ouest newspaper.

The lifelong pals broke into the Franco-Italian Circus looking to grab a zebra, but that animal wasn’t cooperative.

Serge, however, was more than game for some wild-and-woolly, late-night action.

“We were afraid that [Serge] would be rough, but he was very gentle,” Mathieu said. “We petted him and he followed us onto the street.”

The blotto buddies baptized Serge with booze and renamed him “Kuzco,” after the Inca ruler in Disney’s cartoon “The Emperor’s New Groove.”

“[Serge] was happy and proud [to be temporarily free],” Mathieu said.

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You almost earned some nottabags, Frenchbags, but then you had to go all “Emperor’s New Groove.” The only proper name for a sex llama is Falkor.

# posted by douchebag1
8:34 am November, 5 Et Tu Douche? said...

Is it me that Twitter and “social” media is awesome? and by awesome I mean the perfect conduit for the idiocy & narcissism that is running rampant through society. Too bad Serge wasn’t a little more surly cause a braying donkey like junk kick would of been the perfect punishment for these guys.

9:32 am November, 5 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

^ amen.

10:38 am November, 5 Vin Douchal said...

That was awesome ’til I realized they’re French.

That was awesome ’til I realized that wasn’t a giant dog

That was awesome ’til I realized those brohanes posted social media photos while still with the alpaca

That was awesome ’til I saw they got the alpaca drunk

.

That was awesome ’til I realized it wasn’t me and my buds that pulled that caper off. Then it envy-sucked.

.

Nice work, fun lovin’ Frenchies

10:48 am November, 5 The Dude said...

They’re French bitches, bitch. I mean Son.

11:08 am November, 5 Ed Hardy Har Har said...

They all have the same eyes.

11:39 am November, 5 Colossus of Choads said...

The coolest thing about this is that he’s called Serge.

1:19 pm November, 5 Douche Wayne said...

That SO beats the sh*t out of my circus pics!!

“It’s raining llamas . . .”

1:25 pm November, 5 Jacques Doucheteau said...

There’s nothing in here about llama molestation. I’m disappointed.

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The crazy things a google search will turn up however:

https://www.google.com/search?q=arthur+cartoon+porn&client=firefox-a&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=WVN5UuT7FMKIiAKNh4CYDQ&ved=0CAcQ_AUoAQ&biw=1600&bih=728#q=pterodactyl+porn&rls=org.mozilla:en-US%3Aofficial&tbm=isch

2:28 pm November, 5 Guid is Good said...

I guess it is a change from setting fire to parked cars and other Frog national pastimes. I’m thinking Serge is the brains behind that outfit anyway.

9:58 pm November, 5 DarkSock said...

Damn Furries.

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