Monday, January 13, 2014
Creepy Kal Hangs Loose Behind Jennifer
HCwDB hired an expert linguistic trained in ancient Aramaic to translate Creepy Kal’s disturbing under-breast tattoo.
Here are the results of our scholar’s diligent efforts:
When dawn turns to dusk during rainy season, and frogs poop Flav-o-ice like so many porcupine twills, only then will the poultry be fondled.
Historians and scholars will spend many a journal article debating the meaning of this enigmatic archival work.
Chucklehead
Chucklehead and Saggyboobs. I think we have a new NBC sitcom in the making.
Leopard Bikini top looks like it’s hanging on for dear life.
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For all of our sakes – please don’t give up, Leopard Bikini!
Pancake Patty ponders being servant to the penis.
Her: “He’s still behind me isn’t he?”
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Dicktard: “Why you point soul stealing device at me? Me gonna break it!”
Pancake Patty, Servant to the Penis, Yes. Hott, Negative.
That girl needs a Miracle Bra™.
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That guy needs a Fish Slap™.
Confucius says, “floppy hat, floppy titties.” It loses a bit in translation.
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Occidentals
Rev, what do they do with all of the excess Jew Nose?
Oops. Wrong link.
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They take the excess Jew nose and mix it with the Bris-tips. They are then burned with the tears of the Holocaust and palm leaves to create the chrism for Catholic confirmation ceremonies. They are the chosen after all. Mrs. Kroeger was lucky that her grandmother fucked her way out of the camp by banging a Nazi Arian (absolutely no respect) and she has the straighest nose and knees I’ve ever seen. I loves me the symmetrical Jew broads. If only she’d stop spending so much money on the horse shit, and the swimming shit, and the dance shit, and the girls hockey shit. I’m depressed now, time to mix my weed with Cymbalta and smoke my trivial worries away.
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Here we go. https://myspace.com/vindouchal/music/song/francine-66984292-73479374
Those boobs broke up the Beatles.
Those boobs concealed Lee Harvey Oswald.
Those boobs gave Spiderman cancer.
Those boobs can be used as rotation devices.
Those boobs killed Ariel Sharon. Too soon?
Those are some tragic tits. Like when you buy a new pair of boots and they run that huge callous on the side of your big toe and it forms a huge blister, and then the blister pops and partially tears open so that your left with this flabby white flap of gelatinous flesh hanging of the side of your toe. That’s what those tits are like.
Those tits are used as foley for the sound of people getting punched in the face in movies.
Her nipples point at her spine.
Those tits are so flabby she lactates pizza sauce.
Those tits are often mistaken for her labia.
Those tits are so flabby in a pinch she can use them to wipe if there’s no toilet paper.
Those tits are so flabby they have cankles.