Boobies

    Tuesday, September 13, 2011

    Willie The Kidd Discovers the Rare Amazonian Stipper Pear

    Remember kids, only the truest of gangsta outlaws wear silk Armani neck kerchiefs.

    Coquettish Tonya the Tiger for the most fantastic holy cleavite witnessed by mortal eyes on the site in months. Her soft pillowy dance glutens of sheenic inspiritation send Keltic dwarves on hallucinatory dream plunders of spider frogs and whey.

    And the Pear ain’t no slouchin’ neither.

    Tip your cups of Train, fellow hunters. There’s gold in them there hills.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, September 6, 2011

    Happy Rocco Approves of the HCwDB of the Week

    Happy Rocco probably gets a nottabag. But you know he’s the kinda guy who’ll take Sir Ivan as his inspiration.

    And that’s worrisome.

    But why’d I really post this pic?

    Because I’m in some R. Crumb Thunderthigh Crush fantasy thing right now, and Powergirls Kathy and Katie will crush me to a smoove, clutchy ecstacy of death buried in a pillow suckage gaspathon.

    And if that ain’t inspiration for a Monday, I don’t know what.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, August 31, 2011

    Grinny McWad Lika De Boobiez

    Chariza and Nicole lika de credit card that Grinny McWad lika to pay with.

    I hava no reason why I’mma writin’ lika this.

    Maybe izza de Trader Joes cookies.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, August 30, 2011

    The Holy Breasteses of the Iroquois Nation

    From Friday Haiku Pocahontas Hotties to a Pocahontas Cutie, to way back in the site’s early days when we had Pocahontas II: Electric Bagaloo, we’ve had many Native Hottmericans.

    But the Holy Breasteses of the Iroquois Nation best them all with beads and maze.

    The Asian Design Major that Bree almost married still plans to go to Stanford for grad school.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, August 24, 2011

    The Holy Breasteses of Avalon

    As the Oracle of Soapy Bathroom Imagination once foretold: Uponst discovery of the Holy Breasteses of Avalon, the Gnomish Asspuckers will gather. And must be fought off with a stone and a slashing of credit rating, or the storm clouds will gather stronger evermore.

    Heed the Oracle of Soapy Bathroom Imagination.

    For without such warnings, fantasies give way to realities of stupid chin fung and loud, garish techno.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, July 13, 2011

    Old Man Moe

    Old Man Moe could just be an aging sessions rocker. However, Perfect Suckle Chomp Salina stepped from the pages of a hormonal teenager’s most fervered fantasies, and while I should be celebrating the inspirations of her potential persperations, I find my poetic linguistic coitus interruptus.

    For the question tasks me: Ski Mask Dude. What’s up?

    About to rob the place?

    Or just facially cold?

    # posted by douchebag1
    Wednesday, July 6, 2011

    Moped Mike May or May Not Be a Douche But Bikini Clara is Tasty

    Moped Mike? Who gives a rats ass.

    I would breakdance tai chi through a field of twitching mushrooms wearing only worn boxers and a hairnet and playing the orchestral version of a Nico harmony from early Velvet Underground using only a plastic comb and tapping spoons while sipping fermented grapefruit juice from a gimmick baseball cap can holder just for the chance to cup slap the brain addled aardvark that once upchucked on her cotton candy outside the Tea Cup ride at the 2004 summer carnival in Decatur, Illinois. And then I would tickle her underboob with an ostrich feather.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, June 21, 2011

    Manos: The Pecs of Fate

    If Only Sultry Brunette Back Arch Marsha knew what’s coming next.

    Yup.

    That’s right.

    Manos,The Pecs of Fate II: Ass Pear Reveal Thigh Grab.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Tuesday, June 21, 2011

    The Arctic Flunkie

    Skinny tie wearing hipster emo shoecruds may not be your standard issue Jerzey Douchebag. But they will always have a place of mock here at HCwDB.

    That being said, real reason for posting the pic? Real World Hottie Juliette’s glorious globby mounds of firm baby feeding poet inspiring superball gummy gumms shake weight Jake LaMotta raging bulls of round mound of rebound.

    Or, as Shakespeare once wrote:

    But soft! It is the East. And Juliette is the sun! Boobs.

    # posted by douchebag1
    Thursday, June 2, 2011

    Where’s Happy Skippy?

    I can’t even give Skippy a Waldouche. That dude’s just happy to lie in wait under a sea of boobal shower.

    But after the mammtastic pumped up trainwreck of the previous post, we need a little real world Skippy happiness.

    Good for you, Skippy.

    Now run home so we can watch the mellifluous giggle pillowfight that’s about to break out among the Kappa Kappa Woos. I’ve got ten bucks on Tami.

    # posted by douchebag1
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