Goose Runner
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Monday, October 14, 2013
Whipple The Pinturd Gets Mommy's Credit Card, Buys Sophie and Vegana a Bottle of Goose
And the whole thing ended up in an Albuquerque truck stop with required testing for all.
Yup, it’s your Humb Narrs, coffee in hand, on this Monday morning in the City of Angels. I Wish I could deliver this text in the morning radio voice of either the great Johnny Fever or that sappy Harry Chapin song.
Unfortunately I can’t deliver text in any voice.
As Derrida explained, we often conflate the written and the verbal forms of communication but they are entirely distinct spheres of knowledge.
And by knowledge, I mean knowledge.
Thursday, September 26, 2013Herbie Saves Up For a Month, Then Runs With The Goose
I gotta give it up to Herbie.
Sometimes ya just gotta save up as much as you can from your day job as a manager at Rusty’s Linoleum and Floor Tiling and blow it all on a night of overpriced bottle service and temporary cohabit with hotties who will forget your name before they order their next Appletini.
I feels ya, Herbie.
I feels ya.
Thursday, August 22, 2013MackleDouche
Damn, that’s a cold-ass Douchie.
Also, apropos of nothing:
Lotta people talkin’, but few of them know; big legged woman ain’t got no soul.
Discuss.
Wednesday, June 19, 2013Roland The Douchey Thompson Gunner
Bottle of Bubbly: $1200
Reserved booth at trendy Vegas Strip: $1500
Groin itch to last a lifetime: Priceless
Tuesday, May 28, 2013Ming the Christianless
Jesus bling, black pajamas, and Napoleon Complex make Ming a dull boy.
Curvy Katie dolls herself up for a night out after nursing school. And then chooses very poorly.
Monday, April 15, 2013Like Hand Gestures For Hot Chicks
Got a lotta posts in the post-hamper ready for a week of mock here at the ole’ HCwDB, your friend through good times and extended economic recessions.
Like this one. Snarl Stu runs with the Goose with proverbial post-recession posthaste postulation.
Posthumously.
Monday, March 4, 2013A Whole Bunch of Stupid People Doing Nothing Interesting, So I just Peed on a Ferret
Sometimes, when life throws you a skull shirt, it’s time to pee on a ferret.
Although Lana’s golden legs are suckle hint of hopeful de-pee.
Thursday, November 1, 2012Reader Mail: Reader Tim Tagged Benzino
Credit where credit is due:
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DB1,
If one thing is for sure it is the fact I can always tell when I see someone and instantly hate their guts without having ever interacted with them. This is a case of that… Meet “The Benzbag” one of the most diabolical douchebags in the game!
I believe he has been on the site before, if you’ll note the image of the violation of that innocent pear with his sloth like hook hands should be familiar. This clown is the Ernst Stavro Blofeld of douchery! Another Las Vegas club wanker who bills himself as VIP host/personality despite the illusion of living the life of luxury. I think we’re dealing with a $30,000/year millionaire who is up to his eyeballs in debt to keep up appearances.
You will see he associates with a who’s who of douche offenders, Craig Golias aka Peter Pumpinhead, Sunday movie semi regular/idiot wigger Riff Raff, Tatted freak/micro penis sufferer/young and reckless spokes douche Scott Sparks and I believe a picture of him with King Douchius.
Along with that the rest of the atrocity reads like the “Anarchists Cookbook” for practicing douchery, carrying designer murses, having your eyebrows threaded, having your douchey ass facial hair pruned with a straight razor, pretending you’re an MMA fighter and an overload of assholery, douchery and general shit headed behavior.
– Tim
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Well tagged tim. This Vegasian poo is a strong contender at the 2012 Douchie Awards.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012Benzino Mocks you with Mongor Like Stare
Chloe’s belly pooch is made more charming by her shy insecurities over her nose. Rachel parties hard, man. She parties hard.
Tuesday, October 30, 2012Benzino the Benzbag Greases Soho Sophia
Benzino is a creepy hemorrhoidal taint that has been infecting hotts on the site in various forms for many a moon. Benzino made his inglorious debut back in March in The Unholy Pear Fondle.
Now factor in this greasing of Soho Sophia and it is a bridge too far. This aggression will not stand, man.
For the Benzino is quite the curious douchal legend in the making. Witness the taint-by-association with various other douchal legends:
Benzino with Peter Pumpin’head
Benzino with The King and Various Vegas Woo Hotts
Yowza. That’s a serious douche run. And with plenty of hott chicks to warrant full HCwDB mock.
Is Benzino a late contender for the Yearly?
