HCwDB
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Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Jebus Doesn't Shave
(With Biblical citation written by original Jebrovah’s Witness, Prophet Burt):
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And they looked down upon this man with great confusion. Who is this man of questionable clothes and exotic hots? Is he the one they would call Jebus? The wise man DB1 must proclaim it to be so.
– First Letter to the Scrotinthians 6:49
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Gaybag? Or European technobag? Mere technicalities. Jebus is beyond mortal douchescrotewankery. Jebus crosses over into the realm of the choadal sublime.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010Miami Bleach
I believe it was Ralph Waldo Emerson, in Nature and Chest Shave, who first wrote the apocryphal line:
“Miami would be a great place if it wasn’t for all them freakin’ scrotestains hittin’ on the quality ass pear.”
Emerson was a visionary.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010Gunter and Sven Bother Camilla, Accidentally Capture Picture of Alien
The douche… is out there.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010Bluetooth = Autodouche
Outside of a work/office situation, there are no exceptions to this rule.
So let it be written.
So let it be done.
So let it be Valtrexed.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010The 'Baggle Axe
Sometimes, hitting on three hot sisters from upstate Pennsylvania on a college tour of Philly, and going to war against the Greeks in medieval times are, like, totally analogous.
On an unrelated note, the word “analogous” has anal in it. And ogous.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010The ‘Baggle Axe
Sometimes, hitting on three hot sisters from upstate Pennsylvania on a college tour of Philly, and going to war against the Greeks in medieval times are, like, totally analogous.
On an unrelated note, the word “analogous” has anal in it. And ogous.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010Meow Tse Dung
Say what you will about Meow Tse Dung’s “Douchunist Manifesto,” but it scores some quality A-List M.S.G. enhanced boobies.
Monday, July 19, 2010Patel Pwns Freshman Year at Rutgers
And the dorms were never the same again.
In fact, I like Patel. He’s got a bit of ‘tude and a metallic suit, but I’m gonna hand out a nottadouche and a get back to physics studying, the midterm is in two days.
Good on you, Patel. The girls from neighboring Jersey State are properly liquefied and at least brief boob fondle is a distinct possibility in the witching hour.
Monday, July 19, 2010The Semen on the Mount
Jebus speaks:
“Ye are the salt of the margarita glass: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be mixed with Red Bull? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. Ye are the strobelight of the club. A club that is set on a hill cannot charge too high a cover charge. Neither do men light a cell phone, and put it under a bushel, but on a belt clip; and it giveth light unto all that are in the club. Let your cell phone so shine before men, that they may see your tribal tatt, and glorify your chest shave which is greasy.”
— The Book of Mayer, 25 or 6: 4.
Monday, July 19, 2010Prince Warren Assholian of Monaco Voted
Prince Warren Assholian of Monaco and Annoyed Princess Anna wanted to take time off from their HCwDB crown wearing duties to vote in the HCwDB of the Week.
Meanwhile, reader Bryan plays with friday’s HCwDB Tapout logo and discovers that Mindy and Four Prong just opened the first HCwDB clothing store.
