HCwDB
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Wednesday, December 24, 2008
T'was the Night Before Douchemas
…and outside the house,
two putzbags were Shocking,
while sandwiching Lola’s boobies.
Hmm. That didn’t rhyme.
Haven’t seen a leather pop this annoying since the Lenny Kravitz “I want to Fly” craze of the late 1990s.
Run, Lola, run!
Yup. The DB1 is clearing out the Christmasbag pics from the pixel attic and enjoying his first tasty can of Natty Light. It tastes like pee. Bring back the PBR.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008'Tis the Season to be Pooey
Fa la la la la, la la la, bra!
While Homeless Hawk isn’t the worst we’ve seen, Madeline Kahn Elf definitely revs my motor in a motorboatin’ sumabitch sorta way.
It’s a quiet afternoon for the DB1. Most think of their families during this holiday season. But not me. I think of boobies and cheap sugar-wines.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008Pimp Santa
Pimp Santa says Merry Christmas!
Because ’tis the season not be fooled by douches undercover. Underneath Pimp Santa’s seasonal holiday irony is genuine scrotal taint.
But I still want to liberate Sarah Elf. With my teeth. Using only a wrench, a plastic Doctor Who “Face of Boe” action figure, and a small jar of gherkins.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008Putting the "Orange" in Orange County
Where’s Peter Gallagher and Adam Brody to make ironic MySpace cracks when you need them?
Mugs Over Miami
I’m blowing away that last pic, Ron’s Bag Tag, because the commenters were right. That was a whole lotta notta.
Instead, here’s Mugs and Bugs.
I get that Mugs and Bugs like to dress up and hit the Miami party scene together. But matching glasses and identical frost tipped hair are a giant plate of poo.
Jenna and Suzie smile and laugh uncomfortably. Someone’s going to have to fight off a forceful tongue kiss by the bathroom in about twenty minutes with a pleading, “C’mon!… lets get back to the dance floor! My friend is waiting for me!”
Indeed she is, Jenna.
Indeed she is.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008Tiny Annabelle Gets Swamped
When Tiny Annabelle entered the douche scrum, the lesser ‘bags could only hover, making impotent hand gestures.
Only the Stegosaurusbag had the confidence to approach. And make the highly original “Shocker.”
Won’t somebody save Tiny Annabelle on this, the day before Christmas ‘Eve?
And by save, I mean lick her lower calf area like an angry lemur hopped up on cough syrup.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008Curiously Wrong
PIC DELETED
Something tells me the new Altoids ad campaign isn’t going to catch on.
Monday, December 22, 2008Utica has a 'Bag Problem
Yikes.
Because nothing says “Rockin’ Club” like restoring a vintage colonial house.
People of Utica, you have my sympathies. Now pass me the bar wench, with a shot of Petron.
Monday, December 22, 2008The Curious Case of Benjamin Buttchin
There is poetic tragedy, and cultural metaphor rendered in subtextual thematics, when your orange tan and frost tips age in reverse.
Where's Waldouche? Lucky Fratpunk Edition
Somewhere in this lineup of delightful top shelf quality Sorority Butt, I’ve carefully hidden not one, but two, generic Fratpunks.
Look closely.
Can you “Bro'” them?
