HCwDB
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Monday, December 28, 2009
Your Monday Jesus Pecs
With New Years fast approaching, we’ll hold the first 2010 HCwDB of the Week next week.
This week, updates will continue in my drunken and semi-vacationed state.
Your humble narrator is stumbling around lower Manhattan drunk on cheap wines, trying to find a bodega for HoHos at 2am after playing fourteen consecutive games of Duck Hunter. All whilst staring at East Coast educated hottie boob reveal.
Because sexy librarian hotties in bars arching eyebrows at me make the mortal coil worth enduring.
While faux-grease-haired Jesus Pecs haunt our collective psyche and rot our culture like a festering nodal polyp.
The mocking will continue in 2010. Oh yes. It will continue. For our mission statement has not yet accomplished its goal.
Meanwhile, The 2009 Douchie Awards got some nice press over at our favorite alt-weekly in the heart of Douche Mecca, Las Vegas Weekly. Captain Bringdown for the first-strike response.
Sunday, December 27, 2009The Typhoid Mary of Scrotebaggery: Christian Audigier
While the 2009 Douchie Awards are over, let us remember the source of all things douche in 2009.
Saturday, December 26, 2009Stackhouse the Poet Says "Get Some"
A little post-Christmas cheer from the Facebook page of “Stackhouse.” I have titled this poem,”Get Some:”
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I would f*ck that bitch right out of that grey business suit. F*cking women, they have mastered the art of making men sexually aroused in every way possible now. Soon ill be profiling them by what designer brief case they carry not purse
6 o’clock therapy appt. Me, a mirror, and a set of dumbbells. About to make my self real happy. Get Some
Getting tan, getting swole, working on the wip, than back 2 work
Is it bad that I’m looking at my forearms more than any of these whobags. I just got it going on tonight, what can I say
please don’t friend request me if ur a christian and just looking to spread God’s good word. I don’t care that u a liar, and a closet cum gussler. I care that ur wasting my time with ur ugly face trying to be on my friend list…tighten up chub chubs, I don’t play the I’m fat ugly game
f u wear a snuggie, suck my dick u pretentious low life. Put a f*cking blanket on
News flash. If u drink water at a bar u are a f*cking loser, not just a loser but a f*cking waste of siemen and ovarian lining. Step it up u f*cking doushers, or just off ur selves
love the fat dudes in 50 dollar T shirts mocking the fist pump. Go to a gym, have a girl caress ur biceps, and abs b4 u sleep with her. hit a tanning bed than come get ur mock on. It never ends, the sad part is these busted ass trash bags would get laughed out the club up north, or a strong ass beating. Must be nice ..
The minute I get out of this tanning bed’ I’m fist pumping the shit out of this thursday.
Get Some
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Stackhouse the Poet Says “Get Some”
A little post-Christmas cheer from the Facebook page of “Stackhouse.” I have titled this poem,”Get Some:”
—-
I would f*ck that bitch right out of that grey business suit. F*cking women, they have mastered the art of making men sexually aroused in every way possible now. Soon ill be profiling them by what designer brief case they carry not purse
6 o’clock therapy appt. Me, a mirror, and a set of dumbbells. About to make my self real happy. Get Some
Getting tan, getting swole, working on the wip, than back 2 work
Is it bad that I’m looking at my forearms more than any of these whobags. I just got it going on tonight, what can I say
please don’t friend request me if ur a christian and just looking to spread God’s good word. I don’t care that u a liar, and a closet cum gussler. I care that ur wasting my time with ur ugly face trying to be on my friend list…tighten up chub chubs, I don’t play the I’m fat ugly game
f u wear a snuggie, suck my dick u pretentious low life. Put a f*cking blanket on
News flash. If u drink water at a bar u are a f*cking loser, not just a loser but a f*cking waste of siemen and ovarian lining. Step it up u f*cking doushers, or just off ur selves
love the fat dudes in 50 dollar T shirts mocking the fist pump. Go to a gym, have a girl caress ur biceps, and abs b4 u sleep with her. hit a tanning bed than come get ur mock on. It never ends, the sad part is these busted ass trash bags would get laughed out the club up north, or a strong ass beating. Must be nice ..
The minute I get out of this tanning bed’ I’m fist pumping the shit out of this thursday.
Get Some
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Have a Gunter Christmas!
Gunter says Have a Douchey Merry Christmas!!
And don’t forget to enjoy the Dancing Christmas Guidos.
Thursday, December 24, 2009The Twelve Days of Douchemas
Courtesy of HCwDB’s own Mr. Scrotato Head!
Douchebags Roasting on a Open Fire…
Jerz Guids macking on the hotts…
Orange Santa
Who knew Santa was an orange pimp?
And what’s with the Reindeer-Cam POV shot?
Mmmm… candy cane elf hotts with ubiquitous red cups…
Wednesday, December 23, 2009Where's Nubdouche?
Somewhere in this gaggle of Barely Legals, I’ve carefully hidden HCwDB fan favorite fratdouche, Nub.
Look closely.
Can you find him?
Bonus points for finding The Office’s John Krazinski.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009Where’s Nubdouche?
Somewhere in this gaggle of Barely Legals, I’ve carefully hidden HCwDB fan favorite fratdouche, Nub.
Look closely.
Can you find him?
Bonus points for finding The Office’s John Krazinski.
