Legs
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Thursday, March 28, 2013
"The Meatmosians in the Land of Leg Suckle"
Man, I loved that Piers Anthony novel when I was a kid.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013Eighteen Quality Leg Suckles + Four Jabronis
Divide by the coefficient of inefficient coeds, factor in the power of Pi, and the remainder is multiple division.
Yup.
Math humor.
Coffee time.
Thursday, February 28, 2013Hand Gesture Harold Almost Got Away With It
Hand Gesture Harold had it. Smokin’ Sophia. In pic form.
HGH’s “boyz” on the Facebook would be all sorts of jealous. No one tapped this level of hott back during the Fordham law school days.
It was his for the takin’.
All he had to do was show up.
But no.
The appeal of sideways peace sign (SPS) was too much to resist.
And so, Hand Gesture Harold, here is your Douche Crown.
Like a useless old fogey living off past glory, you will remember this day for the next forty years as your life slips into irrelevancy.
Friday, January 25, 2013Friday Bonus Haiku (ultra-rare missing one-half of site's mission statement edition)
Check out this dame’s stems…
Her legs go up to her neck;
Wrap around you twice…
Monday, January 7, 2013Collective HCwDB
For those of you who have been putzing around these holidays and had the temerity not to check in with HCwDB for the past few weeks, there’sa changes afoot in these here parts.
The douche mock is going multiperspectorial.
By this I mean some of the bestest and funniest of the regualrs in the comments threads will be contributing thoughts, rants, and assorted sundries on semi-regular and hopefully regular basis.
And of course I’ll still be mockin’ in true DB1 style.
Coming up shortly, the very first of the most anticipated column since construction began on the Parthenon, “Ask Rev. Chad.”
Sunday, December 30, 2012New Years Rockin' Pear
Happy Guy Says Happy New Pears!!
They may be artificially bronzed to the point of Bleeth, but they can still be squeezed.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012BroRandy Tatts a Tribute to Walter Benjamin
BroRandy’s Last Angel describes the witness to history left behind in the subaltern absences of hegemony.
Amanda’s taut suckle thighs offer choral harmonies of ecstatic gnostic revelations. Like the ancient Sanskrit warlords of Kuudu, I fondle and pokey prod my way to revelation through the sins of antiquity.
Friday, August 31, 2012Where's Douchelegs?
Somewhere in this pic of…
Oh who gives a crap where douchelegs is.
I would suckle and grope my way through a mound of uncooked raisinbread challah dough while blindfolded with an ancient Mayan dishrag while slapping my upper posterior with a gel encrusted fly swatter just for the chance to triple thigh bongo each of these pooch spackles after arranging them in chronologically descending Ms. Clairol hair dye color order. Then I would rub softly on Stripped Bikini Kayla’s belly pooch and lower back thigh with mint juleps and a faded doily. And then I would make them kick me with their legs like an S&M version of the Rockettes while whimpering and crying out for an answer to Fermat’s Last Theorem.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012Carlos Grabs Some Sun Pear
Unlit cigarette doucheface in presence of bobble fondle spackle jump glute chew-toy schnoodle humpy hump is just no way to wake up in New York on a Wednesday.
Yup, your humb narrs is back in Gotham. Alcohol will be imbibed. East Village hotties will be stalked. Luke’s Lobster lobster rolls will be consumed.
Thursday, April 26, 2012Keyser Shmoeze
And like that… he was a douche.
