Orange
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Thursday, October 11, 2012
The Orangudan Still Caught in Meaningless Circle of Orangeness and Depression
HCwDB of the Month winning Orangino, the Orangutan, is heading towards 2012 Douchie Award winning status. But he is not satisfied.
On the negative side, abusing his body to conform to a shape meant to give him cultural validation.
On the positive side, sideboob.
The Oraguntan burps pensively.
Thursday, September 6, 2012Crimson Billy Forgot His Peen
An interesting footnote to history, “Crimson Billy Forgot His Peen” was actually the working title for Woody Guthrie’s dust bowl anthem of 1932, “This Douche is Your Douche.”
Overpriced Veronica has a cute Long Island accent. But that still doesn’t justify how much she paid for that purse.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012Mandarin Orange Comes to Jesus
Still out there.
Still bothering second tier vaguely manish Kardashian sisters with Jesus bling and skin cancer.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012The Greasepitz Are Always Happy
Still out there.
Still Orange.
Still tattooing sanskrit prayers on their pec muscles.
Sorority Hott Hawaiian Tropic Hannah deserves better. Especially for offering Sheen Cleavite hint of boobie suckle.
Thursday, May 3, 2012Orangukevin Says Orangudan Refuses to Commit
Swedish Anya can confirm that Orangukevin’s commitment to the Orange Life goes well beyond the buttockal region, and all the way back to birth.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012Orangudan Says, "Orange is for the body, white is for the face, but blue is for the soul."
Orangudan does not approve of Child Endoragement. Only adults may Orange.
In a Vegas hotel room later that night, Kim will watch Spectravision. Wacky hijinks will most certainly ensue.
Wednesday, May 2, 2012Breaking: New Jersey Bleeth Arrested for Child Endorangement
Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy
New Jersey: Where Bleeth Go to Burn.
Thursday, April 5, 2012Snake Douche points at the womp rat in beggar's canyon
I’d bulls-eye it…
Cheeto Man Lives!
And by lives, I mean stalking wayward Eurohotties like a mutant sentient carrot.
Monday, January 23, 2012Loompus Loompa
Loompis Loompa, do-ba-dee-doo,
Smells like a steaming pile of poo.
Loompis Loompa, do-ba-dee-dee,
Hits on the barely legal Eurohotties.
What do you get when you look like a fruit?
Bronzing as much as a Kardashian coot.
What are you at when you’re getting so ‘range?
It’s realy really very strange…
I don’t like the look of your douchey orange mug,
Loompis Loompa do-ba-dee-da,
You’re really creepy and the DB1 can’t rhyme ba-dee-do.
So shove off because your face is scaring small woodland creatures,
Like the Loompis Loompa do-ba-dee-doo.
Do-ba-dee-doo!
And… scene.
