Potato-Chip Hitler
-
Monday, January 16, 2017
Bro Zach Nation
What a flaming Slouvakian dumpster fire. I don’t just mean this pic of Zach and his Bro, K-Whizz greasing up on Marissa as if her derriere is hosting a bake sale featuring a trenbolone sandwich. I’m talking bigger ‘bags to fry. Yes, even douchier than these spectacular meatwads.
In four days a tangerine uvula will spittle across our collective national identity like an angry, castrated llama gnawing on a Jolly Rancher.
For shame, America.
You have given in to the dark forces of greasy pec butt fondle spikewank.
HCwDB may be no more.
But the time for mock has never been more important.
Friday, August 14, 2015Humpster Dumpster
Humpster Dumpster sat on a wall,
Humptster Dumpster had a great fall,
All Stephanie’s besties,
And all Stephanie’s friends,
Agreed that Humpster Dumpster’s ginormous douchelips should be smacked with a rusty kaiser blade by Anthony Michael Hall.
Somewhere in Sheboygan, A Lone Fartfungusface Twaddles With Kelly
And as they twaddle, two lonely Bud Light Limes go undranked upon.
Tuesday, February 4, 2014Marty McFLuffin
Somewhere in Budapest, a raccoon lost it’s turd pellet.
Look closely.
Can you find it?
Monday, November 11, 2013Hawk Assholio Lights Melanie's Candle
Melanie’s older sister, Joan, felt a sudden surge of regret as she realized that they should’ve vacationed in Niagara Falls instead.
Hawk Assholio felt a surge as well.
But it was probably just his custom pocket rocket.
Thursday, September 5, 2013Semi-employed Ned Unbuttons Tablecloth Shirt, Scores Hottie Jewess Rachel
Semi-Employed Ned likes to mock conformity by wearing a mass produced “Obey” baseball cap with his clone-like adouchrements.
Hottie Jewess Rachel dips apples in honey for Rosh Hashanah. Which is a euphemism for the sex.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013Mogo the Candyman
Too Late.
Woo Cindy ate the candy.
Wednesday, November 14, 2012HCwDB Gets a New Sponsor!
The following email just came in:
————-
Hello Editor,
We are interested in placing the ad in you paper and online Could you please give a cost for 6 weeks. payment:by credit card
Seeks Employees ACCOUNTS RECEIVABLE/PAYROLL/BOOKKEEPER part time workers Plus Good Computer Skills, If you are interested or would like further information, please contact: walker1908@gmail.com
Thanks
——————-
Seems legit. What could go wrong?
Tuesday, October 2, 2012Mini Hitler Chin
Still out there.
Still preparing to write Mein Chinf.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012Potato-Chip Hitler Does Not Approve
Potato-Chip Hitler does not approve of Ciggy McGoebbels hitting on Aryan Anna.
This post brought to you on Yom Kippur Eve by a Jew who now has one more thing to repent for tonight.
