Reader Mail
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Saturday, July 17, 2010
Mindy asks, “Who is the Douche Bag Now?!”
Friday’s Mindy responds to HCwDB in the comments thread:
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I dont date douchebags but I have many friends and if you want to call them douchebags without knowing them well I guess that makes you no better and actually a tool. I personally dont care what you post about me but pictures you are posting are of real people whom you know nothing about or what they’ve been through or like in real person or the context of the picture. I guess what I’m saying is that while some of this may be funny it is at the expense of other people who did nothing to you and rather pathetic that you take the time out of your day to creep online and then save pictures of people you do not know and make up stuff about them. Who is the douche bag now?!
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Who is the douchebag now?
Actually, today, it’s this guy.
Tomorrow? Probably someone else.
Saturday, July 17, 2010Mindy asks, "Who is the Douche Bag Now?!"
Friday’s Mindy responds to HCwDB in the comments thread:
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I dont date douchebags but I have many friends and if you want to call them douchebags without knowing them well I guess that makes you no better and actually a tool. I personally dont care what you post about me but pictures you are posting are of real people whom you know nothing about or what they’ve been through or like in real person or the context of the picture. I guess what I’m saying is that while some of this may be funny it is at the expense of other people who did nothing to you and rather pathetic that you take the time out of your day to creep online and then save pictures of people you do not know and make up stuff about them. Who is the douche bag now?!
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Who is the douchebag now?
Actually, today, it’s this guy.
Tomorrow? Probably someone else.
Thursday, July 15, 2010Reader Mail: Ed Cardy
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dear DB1,
yesterday whilst driving down la brea, i spotted this abomination.
i really wanted to pull along side of them and say ” don’t mind me i just want to snap a pic of the sweet wrap on your ride” but this was the best i could bag.
the whole car was adorned with the wrap of poo. i had to stare at this ride for quite some time and was forced to ponder what went through the drivers mind when getting said ride wrapped in poo. the inhabitants were as douchey as expected but still left me wondering… were they just ad bags? poser bags? gay bags?
all possibilities combined together made sense but neither could stand on a leg alone. interesting…
-douche bagel
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Good catch, Mr. Bagel, and yes, the spread of the Hardy Virus must be monitored at all times. And by monitored, I mean mocked from a safe distance while wearing your seatbelt and listening to The Dead Milkmen on Sirius.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010Reader Mail: The Grieco Virus Reaches India
Reader Krishna writes in from India:
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In case you don’t know DB1…. edhardy is taking over India.
What you see in the picture is Indian kids walking the ramp. You know…I wouldn’t have had any issue if they walked around in traditional garb. What the hell is with this shirtlessness? white belts?
How do I stop this? The priests in the temples balked when I showed them this picture and asked them the same question. Each of them screamed in agony scratching their eyes and immediately embarked on a spiritual journey that requires tens of years of meditation. Before they left on their journey, they cursed me for showing them this picture and wept openly about the state of their country.
May the combined powers of Vishnu, Ganesh and Siva save this country now.
– Krishna
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HCwDB is but one cry against the maelstrom of global cultural neoliberal neocolonialist douchography and the crisis of logo and the body.
Do what you can to mock, Krishna. As the Daoist Monks have taught us, sarcastic mocking is the only way to enlightenment.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010I’m Nothing But a Hater
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To whomever runs this stupid sight-
You’re nothing but a hater. Just thought you shoud know.
– S.B.
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Perhaps, S.B, but if there’s two things I do know, it’s that I love treats, and I ate chew.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010I'm Nothing But a Hater
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To whomever runs this stupid sight-
You’re nothing but a hater. Just thought you shoud know.
– S.B.
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Perhaps, S.B, but if there’s two things I do know, it’s that I love treats, and I ate chew.
Thursday, July 8, 2010Reader Mail: Meeting Four Prong's Kimmy K
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DB1:
I got dragged to a “club” in a Seattle suburb last week, and who should happen to catch me in her smoldering gaze but Four Prong’s Kimmy K. (of Four Prong and the K Sisters).
Fortunately, there was no sign of the Pronger, but I found a snapshot of her with a BrothaBag just to abide the rules of the site. (evidence in photo 2) At first I was unsure of ‘Bag status, until I saw the tone-on-tone arm fung and dearth of brain function stare.
Kimmy’s the real deal, albeit paid-to-pose. Not sure if she’s aware of her Internet lore, but I wasn’t letting on. Although I’m certain she’s aware of my affections — the intermittent pitching of woo mixed with subtle weeping should have her avoiding my texts…
Fighting the good fight in the PNW.
– The Yellow Dart
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Always enjoyable to hear from a fellow ‘bag hunter finding a real world H.C., although Brothabag Gabe here earns a clear and unequivocal nottadouche. That dude is stone cold badass. He would make me his prison bitch.
Kimmy is all sorts of P.T.P. sultry. And for that, I open my wallet and my heart to her “going through the motions” charm.
Thursday, July 8, 2010Reader Mail: Meeting Four Prong’s Kimmy K
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DB1:
I got dragged to a “club” in a Seattle suburb last week, and who should happen to catch me in her smoldering gaze but Four Prong’s Kimmy K. (of Four Prong and the K Sisters).
Fortunately, there was no sign of the Pronger, but I found a snapshot of her with a BrothaBag just to abide the rules of the site. (evidence in photo 2) At first I was unsure of ‘Bag status, until I saw the tone-on-tone arm fung and dearth of brain function stare.
Kimmy’s the real deal, albeit paid-to-pose. Not sure if she’s aware of her Internet lore, but I wasn’t letting on. Although I’m certain she’s aware of my affections — the intermittent pitching of woo mixed with subtle weeping should have her avoiding my texts…
Fighting the good fight in the PNW.
– The Yellow Dart
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Always enjoyable to hear from a fellow ‘bag hunter finding a real world H.C., although Brothabag Gabe here earns a clear and unequivocal nottadouche. That dude is stone cold badass. He would make me his prison bitch.
Kimmy is all sorts of P.T.P. sultry. And for that, I open my wallet and my heart to her “going through the motions” charm.
Thursday, July 1, 2010Reader Mail: The King Meets His People
Douche Ellington meets ‘bag royalty:
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DB1,
While this won’t make the site (alas, no pictures of Hotts), I did have a celebridouche sighting this weekend.
Yesterday, at a hot chick and douchebag-packed pool party at the Roosevelt hotel I ran into King Douchous the IV, who happened to know some of the people in my party. Which of course had me questioning my choice of friends. The moment was kind of surreal. Much like that of a celebrity sighting, but with a lot more grease.
I didn’t get a chance for a picture, because my only camera – my phone – was locked firmly up in my backpack to prevent the touch screen from being tainted by the overabundance of grease in the general vicinity.
– Douche Ellington
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What is most important, D.E., is that you mocked heartily and with linguistic dexterity from a safe distance, and then hit on the hotts when he went to the john to grease up again.
That is the key to a life well lived.
That, and HoHos.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010Guy Too Old To Be at the Party Guy Is Also Guy Not Too Old to Threaten Lawsuits Guy
From June 21st, Guy Too Old To Be At The Party Guy’s Lawyer writes in:
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As you can see, I spoke to an attorney who recently represented your company in a lawsuit in New Jersey.
She recommended I contact you directly regarding a client who is currently pictured on your website: “hotchickswithdouchebags .com” Please contact me at my direct line below so we can discuss how to resolve this issue. At this time, we would simply request the picture be removed.
If you are not willing to remove the picture, I have been instructed to file a TRO, injunction and Complaint for Misappropriation of Name and Likeness.
Thanks,
Michael XXXXX, Esq.
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The lawyer was actually quite reasonable in further emails, and since it’s my general policy (but not legal compunction) to take down pics if asked, I did so. I suspect the lawyer knows he represents a ‘bag.
But work is work, and ‘bag mocking must continue for the good of the republic, so here’s some Pokey Pear.
