HCwDB
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Friday, September 1, 2006
Smiley Perfection
That girl smiling on the right is just superb. She makes me think that all is good in the world. The girl on the left is also fantastic. The douche sandwiches in the middle? Not so much.
Signs of douchitude in these two douche-padawans are subtle, but they are there. Note how the drink is held. Douche. The face. Uber-douche. And of course the coral necklace.
Speaking of mini-scrotes, little Timmy himself made an appearance in the comments section of his pic, showing that 11 year old mini-douches have a sense of humor. Which definitely scores him points. And that’s good, because it means he scored something that night.
Thursday, August 31, 2006The Oily Wank
When one reaches a certain level of zen-douchitude, it’s apparently possible to grow hottie heads out of one’s shoulder.
How much do I hate this oily middle aged wank? It’s not just the ‘Bag Elvis Hand Gesture #36, the blond hilights or the fact the douche is wearing a flower belly shirt, a belly shirt, fer chrissakes.
Okay, yes, it is just all of that.
Tuesday, August 1, 2006What the-?
What the-?
And what’s with the poker table? Was this a game of strip poker gone Dali-level surreal? Jesus Scrote doesn’t even appear to know he’s naked. Not to mention he’s displaying Unholy Scrotite, the polar opposite of the Holy Cleavite. Ugh.
So what’s the story behind this pic? My head is going to explode trying to decipher the absurdities of this moment in time. Yegods.
Speaking of poker and gambling fun, I wonder if you can play strip poker at one of these top online casinos.
Thursday, May 19, 2005Fraikuuu
Poor Bulbous Betty;
Biff gives her two turntables
And a Micro-Bone…
Gimme a Betty
lay down a hot funky groove
and spin her platters
For all of those knobs,
he can’t find her one button
that matters the most.
It’s easy to see.
Clearly lit. Yet nobody’s
using the exit…
Biff pulls a Cosby;
Betty’s gonna regret this
in the morning. Ew.
Professional what?
His shirt that is. “Rape Monkey”?
I like giant boobs.
Professional Gape
Jockey anals cheap porn star
With cartoonish chest.
Porn stars and D.J.s
Burgeoning industries for
Uneducated
Is she still hott chick
if her who-ha looks like a
worn out catchers mitt
Saturday, April 16, 2005
Fraiku
Slab-Abbed Jennifer
And Dual-Domed Denise repose
Amidst two D-‘bags…
Oh..fleeting youth. Ya
Know them abs depreciate
Like deVry placement.
Chips, empties and ice
All that’s left for these lightweights
Mom’s minivan waits
Sea Salt Kettle Chips
Are the third things that I’d eat
In this photograph
The Ginger Bohunk
Hides from Vegas sun or else
He’ll sunburn nipples
Little Big Titty
Goodness will give me renoB
All the livelong day
Forrest and Bubba
regale chicks with shrimp boat tales;
ladies found the “shrimp”
I’d abstain, by which
I mean I’d stain Jennifer’s
Abs with ckock slobber
Sunday, April 10, 2005
Fraiku
Those Bros really like
Over-inflated pink things
And flamingos too.
It eats the brine shrimp
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Pinky hole.
Everything is
Inflated, the bird, her chest
And now my Renob
Llamas escape and
run amok in Sun City.
Where is DB1 ?
What color are shorts?
Another internet craze?
These shorts smell like farts
P V C Polly
Has become the new furrby
Wicked rash erupts
The director yelled
“CUT!”; the flamingo popped,
and there was silence.
The pink flamingo
Is the only inflated
thing good in this pic.
Filming porno in
parking lot means using props
that are within reach.
Chickens rejoice as
Choking the Flamingo
Is the new rage
Devine would never
Had career if appeared in
This “Pink Flamingos”
Forget about wench
What these chaps prefer is
Flamingo scratch-hole
Monday, March 28, 2005
Friday Haiku
My brother’s escaped
From Psych Ward; lock up your daughters;
His name is…PinkSock.
Sock’s laptop is hosed
It’s all ate up with Mal-Ware;
O damn you, Brazzers…
Gaymau5 does not miss
Leg day at the gym ever
It rubs the lotion…
PinkSock battle cry
Turns bitter dissapointment
Finds out got a chick
Catwoman’s birthday
stripper wasn’t really what
Batman expected.
“Meet your new cellmate”
is what you don’t want to hear
when seeing this guy
The PinkSock is swole
everywhere but in his
rubber pantaloon.
Don’t google Pinksock
unless you want to see the
Revs wife’s prolapsed ass
PinkSock is swole since
Batwoman put her finger
in his monkeyhole
The other Pink Meat
Is waaaaay preferable to
This living Jacques link
It stuffs the prolapse
In the anus or it gets
The hose. The Puke Hose
PinkSock wails in angst
Got six more weeks of re-hab
Peed in a cup once
Silence of the Gams
Hannibal Rectum puts
Clarrisse in prolapse.
WHY NOT CARROT TOP?
or…
GUARDIANS OF THE PHALLIC-SCENE
“We Are Groo“.
Your Week-end Video – Incompetently Late “tip-to-tip” tribute Edition
I’m not sure if you “people” (no racist) have been watching Silicon Valley on HBO or not, from writer Mike Judge (Idiocracy, Beavis & RevChad, Office Space, etc., et. al., con carne, per diem).
Mr. Judge has been our NostrilDouchous, if you will, foreseeing the societal damnation if we on the Wall don’t hold the line agin’ the Doucheous Whore’ds .
Well although the new series Silicon Valley started off kinda slow, it ended with what has now been universally agreed upon as the greatest Weenus Joke, both high-and-low-minded, e’er broadcast to the masses. The formula you will see in the background on the clip I link’d below was actually verified by engineers from Stanford, and no I am not making that up.
Brothers in Socks – I give you (no homo): “Optimal Tip-to-Tip Efficiency”.
You may offer your burnt tributes in the comments sections.
Hot Swaps.
