Friday Thoughts and Links
Cabanabags.
They taste just like chicken.
Like record-setting fist pumping, it leaves a stain on both asphalt and culture.
Here’s your links:
Your HCwDB DVD Pick of the Week: “A strange man defecated on my sister.”
Remember kids, if ya wanna help support HCwDB and you’re planning on buying stuff on Amazon, click through the Amazon links on the site before navigating to your items and buying them. It don’t cost nuthin’, and it helps pay for the site.
Long time HCwDB nemesis, The Mayerbag, may be growdsing up after all. Nah. He’s still a douche. Now a douche with botoxed vocal cords..
Douchebags at a rave killed two dolphins with a heroin substitute. No, seriously.
Remember in Swingers when Mikey complained that Tarantino bites everything from Scorsese? Turns out, Tarantino also bites things from 1976 Sonny Chiba Films.
Pop culture therapist pens article explaining why hot chicks don’t like nice guys. Unwittingly explains why no one likes pop culture therapists.
The great Bill Hicks explains why your children aren’t special.
Speaking of great 80s comics who died too young: Kinison.
In the land of the internet, the doucheface “Brogrammer” is King.
No, seriously. Brogrammers explained via URC. A whole new subspecies to be mocked as much as possible.
Morgan Spurlock’s new documentary examines the douchebag phenomenon.
Ayn Rand Explained in One Title.
But you are not here to laugh at just how badly libertarians need to pretend they’re intellectuals. You are here for Pear:
Too much? Okay, how’s about
They might not beat Wednesday’s Pear Party, but they’s enough to get us through a Friday.
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Artbags
Artbags.
Still out there.
Still annoyed by the mid 1960s turn from abstract expressionism to postmodern figurative collage.
Friday Haiku
Showers, dignity,
Toothbrush…These are some things that
Häwk can live without.
Turds of a feather
Float together, Billy Ray’s
Son spreads douche virus
– Capt. James T. Douche
His bumper sticker
Says. “My other tattoo is bad
Chinese wallpaper.”
– The Reverend Chad Kroeger
If you take away
Tatts and hot Asian girlfriend
Dull white guy remains
– Mrs. Nuttersquirt
The tears of a clown
Mix with hot asian lotion
To form pinkish film
– saulgoode42
Bozo Bartholomew Tests ‘Bag / ‘Nottabag
Spikey hair at the pool, perhaps, but that’s about it. Genial attitude, laid back presence, and lack of garish tatts and adoucherements are commend-worthy.
I’m inclined to go with a Notta and a goinpeace for Bozo Bartholomew. There’s just not enough ooblek to convict.
Sexy Suburban Shelley is hard to read, but she’s scoring a solid 86% positive on Hotten Tomatoes.
Doggie ‘Baggin’ Lives On
Still out there.
Still a perplexing decision when deciding how to pose for a photograph.
What next, culture? Congress of Cow?
Something Went Terribly Wrong with This Gentleman’s Head, Hair, Arms, and Upper Chest Area
And by gentleman, I mean Shoescrape of Choadscrote.
Katherine and her bestie, Tori, like to powder each other’s bottoms in the cloakroom with chalk dust and a powder puff from the 19th Century.
And by bottoms, I mean butts.
Arm Tissue
I would expect nothing less at the Omaha Nebraska Shriner Club’s annual “Baldness and Porn” party, held every May. Be sure to buy a raffle ticket! Kathie Sue’s pies ain’t gonna eat themselves.
And by pies, I mean vageen.
