Wednesday, October 15, 2008

HCwDB of the Week: Samurai Scrote


The growing zen-douche legend that is Samurai Scrote (hai!) was simply too powerful to be overcome. scroteus maximus explains:

I think this weekly contest represents the eternal struggle between the tangible and intangible forms of douchebaggery.

On one side we have the flame twins, who are both shoving their preposterous and preposterously gay haircuts in my face. On the other side we have the samurai, whose douche-chi comes from within, equally strong as the douche-chi of the flame twins, despite lacking the douche accoutrements so evidently present around the Flame twins.

However it comes down to this: the Flame twins are simply huge douchebags. Samuri Scrote is better than you, and knows he is better than you, and he knows that you know hes better than you. And it is that attitude that personifies true douchebaggery.

Samuri Scrote FTW

Well said S.M, but let us not forget that sexy sequined hott on his arm. Others agreed, as it was a mandana blowout:

the lone scroat: Samurai Scrote. His hott is the least Bleeh and WTF anyway? Groinkick.

blasphemers and spikedhairetics: Samurai Scrote FTW! The others here are obvious douchebags, but SS operates more covertly with that Rambo/Braddock: Missing in Action tie headband. He will hide in the mud and reach out and kill you while you’re not looking. His hottie is all kinds of cute too!

don’t bring me dowwwwwwn, douche!: Samurai Scrote, no doubt.
Most ‘bags on this site seem to be douchey conformists in their bar, beach, or boat settings. Not this guy. Despite the formal affair, his mandanna and sunglasses at night dare you to contain his scroteyness.

Ponderonymous: Give it to Sammy. He’ll just take it anyway.

johnny: i really want to vote against Samurai Scrote, but it is impossible. The head band, the hott, the Nick Cage face, the fact that he is in the champagne room…it’s a thing of beauty. This picture is the perfect storm of scrotuity.

But the ever-present anonymous challenges us to ask what are we really voting for?

This is, perhaps, HCwDB’s first fully self-conscious vote.

The community, led by the avatar-ed regulars, are as much voting for the photo spectacle itself as for their self-referential, ambitious, and pretty hilarious response to said image. They’re voting for the surrealist, “exquisite corpse” game they’ve been playing with the double-blind of internet anonymity; the dadaist exercise that’s several thousand strong and growing.

It’s a Foucaultian paradigm, EPA, in that meaning is created at the point of consumption, not within the object itself. Thus, Samurai is the most poo of all poo, simply due to the echo of his simulacrum.

Coming in third, but with solid support, KeirNotKier explains why the Grout should not be forgotten:

I have to go with The Sun Grout. He may not be as orange or entirely stomach turning as previous winners, but this week he is the King Kong of Douchebags. I mean the guy has chin pubes, guyliner, spiky dyed hair (for crissakes, the guy’s hair is silver/white). Lest we not forget form his Sun God photo. He has tattoos of pretty little stars up his left arm. Lots of stars?

I agree, the Grout is toxic. On many a week, he and the porn-hott would’ve won. But this is Samurai Scrote’s day, and none shall be superior. Ol’Bag takes it home:

Samurai Scrote, ftw….I mean, he’s trying to use Nicolas Cage’s only facial Expression, and his hott is freaking unbelievable. He REALLY wants to be Nicolas Cage, even though he is sunken-chested
Mandana/suit? Wha?

“Wha?” indeed, Ol’B.

Congrats to Samurai and Bedazzler Hott, and we’ll see them in the Monthly.

# posted by douchebag1

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