Saturday, November 28, 2009

Your Saturday Facepalm


Some days you eat the bar.

Some days the bar eats you.

And some days the douche in the “Dirty Beats” shirt goes home with a girl like that.

And God smites a puppy.

EDIT: Props to Justin, who realized this was another appearance of the Red Hot Chili Pooper, Anthony Peedis and doe-eyed Dina, from September.

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# posted by douchebag1
Links n' stuff:
5:45 pm November, 28 Chris in 'Baghdad said...

Hat tilt and kissy face makes for real Douchebag

5:49 pm November, 28 Justin said...

Isn't this Anthony Peedis, from September?

5:52 pm November, 28 Wheezer said...

@Justin, 9:49 a.m. -

Absolutely – when all else fails, remember the vacant look of the generihott.

5:53 pm November, 28 Anonymous said...

More like V-neck shirt saws it all.

5:54 pm November, 28 Justin said...

She is stupid-sexxxy, sexy and stupid.

5:59 pm November, 28 El Caganer said...

Super hott and dumb looking at the same time. In other words, perfection.

6:34 pm November, 28 Anonymous said...

Good Lord, I get more and more depressed whenever I look at this site. I really need to start taking medication. Wait, I've already started. Probably time to up the dose.

6:42 pm November, 28 Wheezer said...

@Anon, 10:34 a.m. -

Here's Turkey Pear again to cheer you.

Oh, and here's more of her.

6:45 pm November, 28 Troy Tempest said...

Ronald McD ain't got nuthin on the Burger King.

6:55 pm November, 28 Mr. White said...

During her entire life, she has had exactly two thoughts:

1. Appletini!
2. Uuuhhhhhhhhh…

I think the basic frame could be salvaged, though. Bring her to me for a thorough scrubbing, scraping, and tutoring sessions in literature, science, and mathematics*, and she'll do nicely.

*All on a third grade level, natch. We have to learn to walk before we can run.

7:18 pm November, 28 boatbutter said...

Dirty beats is right! Looks like Q*Berts bukkaked him.

7:21 pm November, 28 doucheywallnuts said...

I think her third thought is, "Why am I hanging out with my Dad at a club and why is he dressed like a reject from a Back Street Boys audition."

7:35 pm November, 28 El Caganer said...

What is in her hand?

7:37 pm November, 28 creature said...

as evidenced by their soiled T's, this pair just emerged from a West Hollywood day-glo glory hole bukake session.. poor aim & bad velocity by the fabulous hosts, missed their faces… aw shucks, sometimes the bar eats you!

7:39 pm November, 28 creature said...

Boatbutter beat me to the multi-colored bukake riff… well played sir

8:15 pm November, 28 Anonymous said...

She looks like Little Kimmy who wants to be a big girl from a post awhile back.

8:32 pm November, 28 Anonymous said...

Err, it was Little Kimberly from "Green Glasses".

8:35 pm November, 28 joeEdo said...

tough face.

9:13 pm November, 28 Wheezer said...

@Anon, 12:32 p.m. -

Good eye! And Mr. Green Glasses is also Anthony Peedis, aka today's "Needs a Dirty Beatdown."

9:35 pm November, 28 Anonymous said...

Thank you Obi Wheeze Kenobi! :D

9:48 pm November, 28 Filthy McBaggin' said...

I can't believe two people would consciously wear gear like that.

It looks like something the Red Cross would give you from the 1986 bin, right after your house burned down….

10:18 pm November, 28 pasquale said...

STOP HATEN CAUSE, YOU GUYS GET NO PUSSY!!!!

10:20 pm November, 28 pasquale said...

i must be doing something right if you HATERS are talking about me, its thats just one of my girls i have MANY more…… must suck to me you huh

find something better to do with your time!!! fucking posers

10:42 pm November, 28 Just Sayin' said...

Hey… Pasquale… how you doin'?

How YOU doin'?

She looks like a Stockholm Syndrome rape victim. She's been done so many times she stopped fighting. Pity poor Dina.

10:54 pm November, 28 doucheywallnuts said...

Hey Pasquale, do you get a discount off the cover and drinks with your AARP card?

Also, there's a better way to apply self-tanner so you don't get the shit-stain streaks on your face.

Although, since you are poo, it works for you.

10:54 pm November, 28 Wheezer said...

@pasquale, 2:18 p.m. -

I don't hate cause. It's noble to have a cause in life.

But I've never heard of the "YOU GUYS GET NO PUSSY" cause. Does Hollywood back that one?

10:56 pm November, 28 Wheezer said...

And pasquale, where are those stylin' green glasses of yours?

Fluorescent green ROCKS, broheim!

11:19 pm November, 28 Canadouche said...

Truth is that Anthony Peedis roofied Tiger and was teabagging him when he let flee a wet fart that gave him lacerations to the face. Disturbed, Tiger drove into a tree while Peedis bit his 9 iron.

As a result he fled the scene looking like the recent post to have the fragile and mildy retarded Dina cover for him.

Now has an alibi and a sister who took at hot carl in the club bathroom.

Peedis for honorable mention for his douchebag on douchebag action on Tiger and the hot carl on his retarded sister.

11:30 pm November, 28 Anonymous said...

Bar = Bear

11:36 pm November, 28 pv1 said...

Pasquale, I may not get mad pussy like you do but at least I get to touch my retarded cousin's tits.

11:59 pm November, 28 El Caganer said...

@pv1

Can I touch your retarded cousin's tits?

12:29 am November, 29 joeEdo said...

now that i take a good look at this pic, that girl has to be 17 y/o. i propose douche-pedophile status.

although the look on his face gives away his harmless confusion

12:51 am November, 29 Jessica said...

I have to admit, I'm jealous of their Cherokee tans. It took me many years to finally accept my paleness. Now I even like it. But sometimes I day dream about being a deeply tan person fucking another deeply tan person.

1:20 am November, 29 siren said...

She is delicious. He is a turd with the shit beaten out of it.

1:25 am November, 29 DarkSock said...

As Pasquale looked down at the ruins of his $340 jeans, he vowed to never again allow Jeanette to hump his leg without removing the dentures from her vagina.

2:55 am November, 29 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Pasquale looks like the shit I took twenty minutes ago after consuming turkey and beer for the past three days.

No. Wait…

My poop wasn't wearing gay ass jeans.

2:57 am November, 29 Sergeant Scrote Stain said...

Dina, I would P your Diddy.

And by "P," I mean "pee."

And by "your Diddy," I mean, "in your butt."

3:52 am November, 29 The Desert Douchehunter said...

I thought the last of those shirts were burned at Comiskey Park back in '79. Can we light them on fire now?

5:10 am November, 29 Baron Von Goolo said...

I think Anthony Peedis deserves a pass here. He was wearing a plain black shirt until Cyndi Lauper hurled her Lucky Charms on him.

5:21 am November, 29 DarkSock said...

She Lactates Tempura

6:00 am November, 29 Steve L. said...

in Soviet Douche, bags hunt the hunters.

now that is just fucking frightening.

6:01 am November, 29 Steve L. said...

also, Dina became a bit more poo colored in this photo. coincidence?

9:53 am November, 29 Baron Von Goolo said...

@ darksock 9:21

Did you mean "tempera," vis a vis the douche's shirt?

If not, then you bring the shrimp and I'll bring the Fry-Daddy.

12:24 pm November, 29 Scroteophobic said...

Once more pasquale demonstrates that the mugs were right. "You don't have to be illiterate to be a douchebag – but it helps!"

Recently an ex-cricketer decided to make Warholesque abstracts by whacking paint covered cricket balls at a wall. Despite having no words, letters or even symbols it was still a better written, more comprehensible and better punctuated piece of work than the two posts above.

2:45 pm November, 29 Scroteophobic said...

That is the two posts above by pasquale – not the Baron (hyperventilates at thought of smack-down he nearly invited upon himself)

4:08 pm November, 29 ImageWrangler said...

Pasquale is latin for "fondles young boys." I'm assuming Dina is actually a tranny. Things are making more sense, especially with infusion of breffast scotch.

9:06 pm November, 29 Anonymous said...

Actually Dina (aka Little Kimberley)'s friend from "Green Glasses" is one of the finest examples of a Peruvian footballer Keira Knightley tranny I've ever seen outside the gloryhole doily that is Picadilly Circus /or Leicester Square.

However, they do roll them different in Camden Town. Most of the Keira Knightley footballer trannies there are Jamaican.

They also have [Jamaican jerk] porch beef and boobs, those trannies from Camden Town.

Samurai Scrote, Lämp, Lllammmer, narwhal cockk lightsaber scratchhole posse.

3:42 am November, 30 Whoop-di-douche said...

God doesn't smite a puppy, He rescues one.

She is a pink-dyed poodle.

12:21 am December, 1 Hermanos Rodriguez said...

Hipsterbags are the worst.

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