Thursday, August 18, 2011

X-Games 2012: “Strip Rafting”

Say what you will, but it’s rather innovative in its own way.

# posted by douchebag1
2:11 pm August, 18 dbBen said...

If that is indeed a tattoo of a happy dude as an undercover skeksis….I’ll give him a notta.

2:15 pm August, 18 Mandouchian Candidate said...

Nice Dark Crystal Reference dbBen. Second from left looks like one of the gelflings…

2:20 pm August, 18 Douche Springsteen said...

There’s never a U-boat around when you need one…

2:22 pm August, 18 hermit android thumbs said...

If Huck Finn had Red Bathing Suit on the raft, he would have thrown Jim into the river, or sold him for some quick cash.

2:24 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The guy on the bottom right with the stogie has three arms and a rather hairy back. However, the most disturbing thing is that he has a tattoo of Jon Stewart on his bicep. What the fuck is that about. I need to smoke and ruminate on today’s disturbing events. DB1 is fuccking with our heads.
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Goldmans
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2:27 pm August, 18 Colossus of Choads said...

Far-left is a “Gelf” id like to have “Fling” with….

2:28 pm August, 18 schlicht bindenburger said...

vagine, far left , seems ready to drop a stinky! YOU CUNTS!

2:32 pm August, 18 Bigphatnotadouche said...

Lot of Hotts going down on that sinking ship. I will be glad to give the the Hotts mouth to mouth.
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Titanic

2:35 pm August, 18 Fatness said...

Far left looks like she knows what to do with that pole.

2:42 pm August, 18 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Kayla had been kegeling the pole since they took off from Cuba in the hopes that they could find a better life here in the States. Through rough seas and high winds Kayla continued to give her all so that the others may live. Just as they approached land however, Tina’s (on the left) gangrenous infection took over to the point where everyone thought that she may have to have her hips, ass, and upper thighs removed. It was either that or kick her overboard and let the sharks take care of her. It didn’t matter to Kayla. All she could keep thinking was “Flex 1, slide 2. Flex 1, slide 2.” In their momentary distraction they all forgot about Chip’s mutant third arm as a result from his mother free-basing Thalidamide in her third trimester. Maybe he wouldn’t be the first to go after all. Captain Chestbrah had a tough decision on his hands. Lighten the load by getting rid of these two and then changing course to Thailand or continue on to the States to let Kayla get a breather and let her snail treads heal up. What to do? What to do? “Bros before hos” yelled Capt. Chestbrah as he simultaneously sent all of the bleeths overboard so that it was just him and Chip. Legend has it that the raft was later found on a beach near Miami with only a pair of labia majora stuck to the pole and a suitcase full of panda meat hidden beneath.

2:58 pm August, 18 El Bastardo Magnifico said...

This picture is so saturated with disease vectors that merely looking at it makes my pee burn.

3:41 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Whole Lotta Yuck

3:41 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

What Is And Should Never Float

3:44 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Hotts (and ) Dogs

3:46 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Gropy Dick

3:46 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Cockk Custard Pie

3:47 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Ten Years Unemployed

3:47 pm August, 18 DoucheyWallnuts said...

The bleeth on the left is an all-time skank. The hand gesture, the thigh/torso tatt, and definitely generally cute enough. A dirty 8.5. She’s noteworthy, the others are run-of-the-mill and Red Bikini thinks she’s way hotter than she is.

3:50 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Nose Candy Stash Rock

3:50 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...
3:51 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

South Bound Dirty Suarez

3:52 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Kushmir

3:53 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Hotts On For Nowhere

3:54 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Fartbreaker

4:04 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

Houses of the Homely

4:30 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In My Time of Lying

4:30 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Black Hog

4:31 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Ten Years Thong

4:31 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Melon Song

4:33 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

In Through The Out Whore

4:33 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Ho Many More Times

4:33 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Shaved And Confused

4:35 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Song Remains The Stain

4:35 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Tampon Song

4:35 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Snivelling Riverside Blues

4:53 pm August, 18 I give up said...

The dOuChEAN

4:54 pm August, 18 Hermit said...

Boogie with Poo.

4:56 pm August, 18 Hermit said...

Masturbation Breakdown

4:58 pm August, 18 Hermit said...

Ignorant Song

4:59 pm August, 18 Hermit said...

When my Chevy Breaks

5:01 pm August, 18 I give up said...

Stairway To Kevin

5:03 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This is a song of hope. Hope that all people with mild Cerebral Palsy find peace in their time of dying from getting fucked into Gran Maul seizures and abandoned by heartless cads like Dr. Bunsen Honeydouche and me.
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Salty fuccen tears Gimpy.

5:08 pm August, 18 I give up said...

No Quarters, So We’re Gonna Have To Play With Nickels- a drinking song

5:13 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Hats Off To Gay Pooper

5:13 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Prancing Days

5:13 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Gallows Pole. What?

5:14 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Achilles Left Hand

5:14 pm August, 18 Wedgie said...

Tomorrow I’m putting one of those in at the Crystal Pier in San Diego.

5:14 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Since I’ve Been Boning Stu

5:15 pm August, 18 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

The Immigrant Fung

5:48 pm August, 18 The Dude said...

Gazing upon these Hawts, I’m watching the rest of my life flash before me.
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Five Weddings and a Funeral

6:01 pm August, 18 Fatness said...

Five divorces and a paternity test.

6:25 pm August, 18 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Red bikini off the shoulder FTW.

6:35 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Since I’ve Been Dripping Goo

6:35 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Communicative Disease Breakdown

6:37 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

The Moron Song

6:38 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Whoring and Tearing

6:40 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

The Battle of Rottencrotch

6:41 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Bad Times Worse Times

6:41 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

No Thank You

6:42 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

I Can’t Quit You, Syphilis

6:42 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Hey Hey Why’s My Junk Blue?

6:43 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

D’yer Fuk’er

6:44 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

White Pustule/Black Weeping Sore

6:44 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Misty Mount’s Her Top
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I don’t even know what that means.

6:45 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Oxycontin Baby

6:46 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Night Blight

6:46 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Living Loving Maid (She’s Just a SLAPWHOAR)

6:47 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

When the Condom Breaks

6:48 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Rot & Roll

6:49 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

South Bound Dirty Sanchez

6:49 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

How Many More Times (Do I Have to Take These Antibiotics)

6:50 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Bron-Yr-Barf

6:51 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

For Your Bud Lite

6:52 pm August, 18 Mr. White said...

Walter’s Cocck

7:10 pm August, 18 The Dude said...

d’ohh! There’s a sixth hawt hiding behind Fidel Nastro and his cigar.
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Little Red Hiding Hott. She’s prolly the only cute one.

7:59 pm August, 18 Elwood BluezBag said...

Far left, 10 years from now, hears this question: “Mommy, why are you tatted up like a circus freak?”

8:02 pm August, 18 DoucheyWallnuts said...

As the unofficial comment thread ombudsman I note the following.

1) Led Zepplin came up with song titles well suited to douchebag/bleeth parody.
2)The Black Crowes are underrated even taking into account their commercial and critical success.
3) Talented guitar players have inordinately long forearms.
4) Talented guitar players, regardless of the their level of talent, should never wear satin shirts, especially when they have man tits.
5) Jimmy Page looks like an old lesbian.

8:32 pm August, 18 H-Train said...

That boat is awesome, stop hating on the stripper boat, its my neighbors, and it will bring out the lil doucher in anyone.

8:41 pm August, 18 H-Train said...

Austin, TX Greatest place in states, besides SD

8:59 pm August, 18 Vin Douchal said...

@ Rev 5:03
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Dayum, Page played the shit outta that Tele in that guitar solo. I never saw him play one on stage, always a Les Paul

11:21 pm August, 18 Andy C said...

lil red is worth any scrote wankery you can dig up, she is immortal and any insult you levy against this pic i can rebuff with her perfect splendor. yes she is with douche monsters, yet she is not tainted.

3:18 am August, 19 Steve L. said...

$10 says that no one in this photo can explain the difference between “its” and “it’s”.

5:53 am August, 19 Douchie Arnaz said...

Man, Zeppelin could do anything. Best thread ever!

6:14 am August, 19 Hurl Scheibe said...

Houses of the Hole-y

6:17 am August, 19 Hurl Scheibe said...

Killing Whore

6:38 am August, 19 I R A Darth Aggie said...

As long as the hotts end up nekkid and pole dancing, and the douches get used as anchors, and there’s plenty of beer and whiskey, then I’m not seeing a problem…

7:29 am August, 19 Et Tu Douche? said...

Tools in the Rain

7:29 am August, 19 Et Tu Douche? said...

Over the Pills and Far Astray

10:02 am August, 19 Scrodo Baggins said...

This is Wankus McHannibull, of eponymous and After Dark infamy, by the way. Having failed chemo for his malignant douchoma, he grew some hair and got the skeksis tatt to celebrate his submission to the dark side. If you look closely (I don’t recommend it), you can see a bit of his side tatt poking out. Quite a week for Wankus!

10:05 am August, 19 Scrodo Baggins said...

Oh, and: Gon-Yr-Aura Stump.

10:27 am August, 19 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

Gallows Pole
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Hold on. I didn’t have to change the title.

2:48 pm August, 19 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

CarouselamBra. Didn’t have to change the title.
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This can go on for another 65 songs.
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Headbanger Viking Poets

2:50 pm August, 19 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fucking Vikings.
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Jimmies

4:41 pm August, 19 Whoop-di-douche said...

Whenever I spy a river raft with a floatload of Huck Finn-Tom Sawyer wannabes (and perversions of Becky Thatcher) on this site (rare indeed) I am once again reminded of the probability that DB1 is channeling Mark Twain.
River channeling.

7:10 pm August, 19 DoucheyWallnuts said...

Douched and Confused

11:26 pm August, 19 Stephanie said...

Babe,I’m Gonna Douche You
Douche In The Rain… oops someone already…

[…] • Douchebags: Stripper pole on raft? Yes, it is. […]

10:03 am August, 20 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Never eat 78 pieces of Dim Sum for brunch. Son.

2:51 pm August, 21 Anonymous said...

Where’s the floating trash bag?

10:15 pm August, 22 digital product said...

Gossip and the Controversy factor http://ow.ly/69GLq?e=110l19

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