Tuesday, November 22, 2011

“Bring me the Butt of Frieda Garcia!”

For it is glorious.

Who’s Frieda? She’s my secretary. Who am I? The guy chomping on Frieda’s butt globbs.

Andy Swirlwind has the aesthetics of a rotting mango, and should be mocked accordingly. If Frieda’s butt globbs hadn’t drawn my attentions, he would, and should, be mocked further for being a heaping urberdouche.

# posted by douchebag1
11:41 am November, 22 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Matching tattoo and magic marker shirt scribbles.

11:48 am November, 22 Vin Douchal said...

“Trust No One” as in whomever agreed that tatt was a good idea

11:51 am November, 22 Vin Douchal said...

That straw is having an orgasm. I bet it’s ready to spasmodically pump and squirt it’s contents all over her lips, face and open, wanton , supple mouth, flowing hair and pointy sexy nose, then be carressed lovingly with her tongue and delicate yet knowing fingers until put away with the drink on the counter

12:01 pm November, 22 Wedgie said...

Perfect representation of hottie & d.b.
She will rue the day.
His parents already do.

12:10 pm November, 22 Wheezer said...

Her purse is hovering in midair because of the fright it sensed at being felt up by Trust (No One) Fund Tommy here. He’ll let go of Frieda once he sees she also din’t bring any cash.

12:10 pm November, 22 Wheezer said...

didn’t*

12:20 pm November, 22 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

Where does the shirt end and his tatts begin?
.
It doesn’t matter.
.
Where does her perfect ass end and her va-jay-jay begin?
.
.Well, that doesn’t matter either.
.
.
.Analities

12:23 pm November, 22 Hurl Scheibe said...

She does have a nice butt.

If his mother and father enjoyed butt sex more, he would never be here.

12:29 pm November, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

J-Lo’s midget husband wasted no time pursuing Kate Hudson. When she is filmed through a greased and filtered lense like the fugly Drew Barrymore. And he is on a stool and bloated.
.
Mang
.
PS: I have heard through the Apevine that Nancy Dreuche carries a vestigial clitoris which never devolved from a dolphin cock.

12:31 pm November, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Anybody ever realize that we all have a lot of free time on our hands or that maybe we just don’t give a fuck sometimes?
.
Procrastinators

12:32 pm November, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^I was going to make that comment later.

12:44 pm November, 22 Douchble Helix said...

♪♫All she wants to do is fuck.♪♫ Lucky guy.

1:01 pm November, 22 Magnum Douche P.I. said...

These two should have stood next to each other when they were in front of the mirror, then changed clothes. Fucking headache looking at all the black and white squiggly lines.
.
Her ass is amazing. His bloated abdomen says too many italian beef samiches.

1:17 pm November, 22 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

NOW I know what that subliminal gesture he’s making with his hand around the cup means:
.
http://www.brobible.com/bronews/story/psa-oregon-o-hand-sign-vagina

1:21 pm November, 22 Troy Tempest said...

she is what happens when gigglehotts bleethify.

Genesis did a song about twats like these two long ago.

the grand parade of lifeless packaging.

1:47 pm November, 22 Nancy Dreuche said...

“Fist No One”? Okay buddy if you insist.
.
@Rev, I bet you’re wondering how I knew, about your plans to fling some poo….I heard it through the Apevine.

1:48 pm November, 22 Capt. James T. Douche said...

Justin Theroux’s deadbeat brother sure can wheel em in! In a couple hours she’ll be lying passed out in her crumpled bed sheets with a crotch full of Vodka infused semen. After seeing this the X-Files has now been ruined for me!!! Is nothing sacred to you people!!!

1:51 pm November, 22 Wheezer said...

@Troy, 1:21 p.m. –
.
That title is an apt metaphor for what passes as “culture” these days, and apparently in the eyes of Genesis, circa 1975 as well. I guess that’s what and why we mock.

1:53 pm November, 22 Wheezer said...

For those of you who weren’t/aren’t as familiar with the older stuff from Genesis, here are the lyrics:
.
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/lambliesdownonbroadwaythe/thegrandparadeoflifelesspackaging.htm
.
The Grand Parade Of Lifeless Packaging Lyrics
.
The last great adventure left to mankind Screams a drooping lady
Offering her dreamdolls at less than extortionate prices,
And as the notes and coins are taken out
Im taken in, to the factory floor.
.
For the Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging
All ready to use the Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging just need a fuse.
.
Got people stocked in every shade,
Must be doing well with trade.
Stamped, addressed, in odd fatality.
That evens out their personality.
With profit potential marked by a sign,
I can recognise some of the production line,
No bite at all in labour bondage,
Just wrinkled wrappers or human bandage.
.
The Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging
All ready to use
Its the Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging just need a fuse.
.
The hall runs like clockwork
Their hands mark out the time,
Empty in their fullness
Like a frozen pantomime.
Everyones a sales representative
Wearing slogans in their shrine.
Dishing out failsafe superlative,
Brothere John is No. 9.
.
For the Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging
All ready to use
Its the Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging just need a fuse.
.
The decor on the ceiling
Has planned out their future day
I see no sign of free will,
So I guess Ill have to pay, pay my way,
For the Grand Parade.
For the Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging
All ready to use
The Grand Parade of Lifeless Packaging just need a fuse.

2:08 pm November, 22 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I saw the last incarnation of Genesis with my oldest daughter, who was then 4. No that’s not right. I saw it with a dude I knew cause the old lady had just popped a kid. The concert was pedestrian and greeted with scattered boos throughout. I can’t remember why it was so average. I like all of Genesis. Even the part where that chicky-poo listens to the snake like a malfluous Nancy Drew at a Sadie Hawkin’s dance.
.
Ecclesiastics 12:7

4:07 pm November, 22 Nostradouchus said...

The tat artist needs to practice his penmanship. I couldn’t tell what that said until someone above read it…

And it’s still wrong anyway. It’s supposed to say “Raging Flamer.”

5:37 pm November, 22 DoucheyWallnuts said...

I think she’s a One Shot Hott.
.
Parthenophobes

6:35 pm November, 22 Stephanie said...

I’d glue them together permanently,see how long they smile then?

9:37 pm November, 22 DarkSock said...

I peed in a house once.

10:32 pm November, 22 fatness said...

Not enough chlorine in the world to get that off her.
.
Quarantine

4:50 am November, 23 CB Popped said...

Lady Gaga is stealing so much from 70’s Genesis and Alice Cooper.
Fucking Criminal.

5:56 am November, 23 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Fucking winter. All cold and dry and frozen dog turds just like Nancy Dreuches’ barren queef-hole.

7:23 am November, 23 Nancy Dreuche said...

@RevChad, I have the sneaking suspicion I am the Moby Prick to your Captain Norehab. Give into your anger and write me up a solid 2 to 3 paragraph thingy so I can copy paste it and then email it to DB1. Much oblige.

8:33 am November, 23 I R A Darth Aggie said...

Ah, the douchedox. She is bleethy, in a come-hither-mayan-eye-of-coitus form dressed in a dress that doesn’t conflict with his tatts.
.
He is poo.

12:11 pm November, 23 Douche Springsteen said...

Vin, do you write for Hustler Letters? Something about your phrasing seems eerily familiar.

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