Thursday, December 1, 2011

Creepy Bukowski Fan Asks You If You’ve Ever Read Bukowski

The correct response to Creepy Bukowski Fan is: “Excuse me, I’m waiting for a friend. Now please do not soil upon my napkin.”

# posted by douchebag1
11:26 am December, 1 skrag2112 said...

Classic “Ewww!” face.

11:28 am December, 1 Mandouchian Candidate said...

The Color Purple standing next to him looks she can barely contain her irritable bowell syndrome.
*
He is rank and probably a litle narcissistic for a hipster, but gotta give him a pass, unless he hits TCP; than I give him an AIDS test.
*

Gorillas in the Mist

11:29 am December, 1 Ich verstehe sie ist heiß said...

He hasn’t yet figured out that 24 y/o chicks aren’t interested in 44 y/o dudes with no money who look like a 115lb Fruit Loops toucan. When he does finally realize this in a few years, he’ll also finally think of a purpose for that crawlspace under his house.

11:31 am December, 1 hermit said...

Looks like Marrisa just read a few lines of Rev Chad.

11:31 am December, 1 soy bomb said...

I dunno, guy seems like a good egg.

11:40 am December, 1 Capt. James T. Douche said...

By the asshole of Allah!!!!! Please tell me he’s not a sex offender registry somewhere!!

11:42 am December, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

She’s giving him the Confused Eye of WTF!

11:43 am December, 1 tall guy said...

I possibly have a few things in common with this guy. In spirit only mind you. I’d never be seen looking like that or preying on hotts practically half my age (not suggesting he’s doing that, either), which takes into account almost every hott currently wandering around the planet (MILFs excluded).

11:44 am December, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

This guys so creepy he makes Christian Slater look like a man.

11:45 am December, 1 Et Tu Douche? said...

Why are these people swinging radioactive, glow in the dark, Frank Mercurios in the background? Medusa is not going to be happy when she finds out that Frank has been reduced to a novelty party favor for silly drunken wooo notts.

11:47 am December, 1 Findertweet said...

Fisher Stevens is back. And to think, he was once married to Michelle Pfeiffer. Or something like that.

11:53 am December, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

^Fisher Stevens is correct. I couldn’t remember the name but have always fantasized about meeting him and breaking his neck for no good reason. I hate that fucker.

11:55 am December, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Where’s Phineas?

11:55 am December, 1 jonezy said...

yea, like ETD said, is that a light saber in the background?
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Or is it a rod of uranium?

11:56 am December, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

Creepy once played a Stork on an episode of Muder, She Wrote. I miss Angela Landsbury. She had one hot box in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.
.

11:57 am December, 1 Nancy Dreuche said...

Player pro tip: never wear a shirt where the guy on it is hotter than you.

12:11 pm December, 1 Wedgie said...

Rev, you sick bastard. Angela Lansbury smack? She’s like everybody’s granny. Speaking of grannies, I always had wood for the one on Beverly Hillbillies. Get Some.
.
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And that chick has the classic “Who farted?” face if I ever saw one. And I have. Because Mrs. Wedgie makes it at me all the time. Especially when I “dutch oven” her ass.
Marital bliss.

12:15 pm December, 1 The Reverend Chad Kroeger said...

I never got wood on for Angela as much as I do for Aretha Franklin and her beefy hambeast thighs. I’d lick her black booty from here to the mac and cheese trough.

12:16 pm December, 1 Wedgie said...

Now that I’m thinking about it, that’s the same face she made in our wedding photo, too.
Anybody want the under?

12:19 pm December, 1 tall guy said...

Yeah so my ‘things in common’ end with being creepy. Not suggesting the guy in the photo is, but neither am do I endorse him if he is. I’ve got a Mark Steyn tee shirt, Dreuche. I’m a monghead compared to him though.

12:20 pm December, 1 Jacques Doucheteau said...

I think this guy just told her a joke.
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What’s the difference between a Porsche and an erection?
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Leaning in real close and whispering in her ear: I don’t have a Porsche.
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Yeah, buddy!

12:29 pm December, 1 Nancy Dreuche said...

Where was this taken? The little Panda head in the corner leads me to believe it was at Club Pedobear. Also the Bukkake guy looks like he might know a thing or three about Meghans Law.

12:48 pm December, 1 Anonymous said...

Bukowski Fan is a fish-out-water if there ever was one. Can’t anyone catch a pass with you weasel dicks? ‘Vade in pace’ you pasty-faced-fukkr

12:48 pm December, 1 Vin Douchal said...

He’s wearing jodhpurs but the only horse he’s ever ridden is Plinky’s Mom’s stiff thumb

12:58 pm December, 1 Vin Douchal said...

Is it time to retire my backwards Kangol hat and Member’s Only jacket over a Pynchon T-shirt look?

1:41 pm December, 1 Nancy Dreuche said...

@anonymous, this guy is wearing a shirt with a douchebag author (Bukowski was a womanizer, a deadbeat dad and an alcoholic, I think that all qualifies you for douchebag status. And if it doesn’t then I think I’m on the wrong site.) Plus if that isn’t enough proof his pinky is raised off the goddamn glass. Case closed.

1:50 pm December, 1 Dr. Bunsen HoneyDouche said...

I will NEVER retire my Samuel Beckett T-shirt that says “You just missed Godot” and my black and gold zoomba pants for anyone! No fuccen way!

1:50 pm December, 1 DarkSock said...

The first annual “Recently Released Sex Offender/Retired Stripper” Social ended in tragedy and a lot of feverish shovel excavation in the dark of night.

1:51 pm December, 1 DarkSock said...

RevChad @ 11:55 am FTW
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Sons.

1:51 pm December, 1 Choad The Douche Sprocket said...

If you go to any comic book, video game, gamer, or Star Trek convention…or a Rev Chad family reunion….every other person looks like this dude. (or so I’ve heard)
.
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.They are to be pitied more than mocked. Unless you have the misfortune of getting buttonholed into a conversation with them…about who knows what nerd esoterica….
.
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.I’m not sure he could get laid in a whorehouse…
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….and for that, we gotta say notta.

2:06 pm December, 1 Ted Brogan said...

That’s an appropriate look of disgust.

2:32 pm December, 1 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Jewish Bono achieves fail.
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I hope I don’t get that kind of look behind my back when I wear mt Ayn Rand t-shirt.

2:34 pm December, 1 Dude McCrudeshoes said...

Sock @ 1:50 FTW

3:11 pm December, 1 IL Douché said...

“how come you’re so ugly?”

“my life has hardly been pretty — the hospitals, the jails, the jobs, the women, the drinking. some of my critics claim that i have deliberately inflicted myself with pain. i wish that some of my critics had been along with me for the journey. it’s true that i haven’t always chosen easy situations but that’s a hell of a long ways from saying that i leaped into the oven and locked the door. hangover, the electric needle, bad booze, bad women, madness in small rooms, starvation in the land of plenty, god knows how i got so ugly, i guess it just comes from being slugged and slugged again and again, and not going down, still trying to think, to feel, still trying to put the butterfly back together again…it’s written a map on my face that nobody would ever want to hang on their wall.

sometimes i’ll see myself somewhere… suddenly…say in a large mirror in a supermarket…eyes like little mean bugs…face scarred, twisted, yes, i look insane, demented, what a mess…spilled vomit of skin…yet, when i see the “handsome” men i think, my god my god, i’m glad i’m not them” ― Charles Bukowski, Sunlight Here I Am: Interviews and Encounters, 1963-1993

4:01 pm December, 1 Elwood BluezBag said...

Who farted?

5:15 pm December, 1 Guid is Good said...

Those free drinks at the poetry reading aren’t tasting so good now are they?

5:51 pm December, 1 CB Popped said...

^Dreuche – lifted pinky – nice detailed ‘baghunting.

Are they standing on a fouton?

6:13 pm December, 1 creature said...

he’s goony looking & more than likely never been laid
she looks like she has a very bad yeast infection
no hott chick or douchebag here
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…Nancy Dreuche if you think Charles Bukowski is a db, than you truly are on the wrong site!

6:14 pm December, 1 Nostradouchus said...

I also enjoy my water with a straw in a loud club. Prune juice was obviously not on the drinks list.

6:51 pm December, 1 Blah said...

Is he throwing a gang sign or just exhibiting some freshly excavated [fill in blank here]?

6:53 pm December, 1 Blah said...

He stole those glasses from Larry King.

7:01 pm December, 1 Blah said...

Girl in purple dress: “Who is Charles Bukkake? Bukowski? Whatever.”

8:05 pm December, 1 Stephanie said...

He’s nottadouche. He’s a nerd. He’s trying to tell the world he’s cool with the shirt. He’s also just called his Mom and told her where to pick him up.

8:10 pm December, 1 Nancy Dreuche said...

@creature, oh geez, is that you in the picture dude? If so I’ll stop hattin’ so hard on you. You need all the help you can get. Bygones be bygones n’ shit. I’m done with all the bad ju-ju on here.
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@CB Popped, thank you. Life really is in the details.

8:22 pm December, 1 Stephanie said...

I don’t know if Bukowski’s is all that. Read his stuff? Most of it is now,out of print and hard to find.
I think he writes things no one else did at the time,raving maniacal stuff. Very stream of consciousness, Some of it is funny,like Post Office. And it is brilliant. But on a personal basis he was a real asshole drunk that pickled his own liver. He slowly killed himself, what a drag.

8:24 pm December, 1 idfma said...

Yep, the thing wedged in my ass sideways is just about this big, see? Right about like that.
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That’s why I look like I’m in pain.

8:31 pm December, 1 troy tempest said...

I think she queefed a wet one into her thong and now it’s all stanky and that’s why she has that look on her face.

4:29 am December, 2 DoucheyWallnuts said...

This guy is the result of a hideous experiment that saw Mr Bean crossed with Richard Greico.

12:05 pm December, 2 Wheezer said...

I guess Disgusted Denise in Denver did Carmacita one better.

12:08 pm December, 2 Baron Von Goolo said...

Go easy on the poor slob. Will Smith just shot him in the face and his head hasn’t filled in yet.

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