Fraiku
*shout out to Vin Douchal for coming through with some excellent ‘bag pics…you th’ man, dog*
Hipster Pipe-Farter
Butt-Pokes Trish with Irony;
Pretends she’s Bieber.
Unfortunately,
They are only staff left alive
At Charlie Hebdo.
Back in Olden Days
Curly, Moe and Larry Stooge
Wore this as swimsuits
Mon amour, zap my
plump, clamped nipples from your car
battery handbag.
These two are proof that
anal causes pregnancy
please don’t reproduce
After seeing this
I couldn’t get a renoB
Sniffing Cialis
If horizontal
Stripes make you look thin. This
Cock Fan must be dead.
I’d smack this guy with
A bag of nickels and then
Drink some Chianti
His sun-blanched penis
sallow and ineffective
perks up to show tunes
Amongst this trio
the only one hetero
is the tennis shoe
He only wears stripes
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Zebra Hole.
I am among the eldest of statesmen of the few remaining holdouts who haunt these hallowed halls, once prosperous and shit. The right reverend Chad Kroeger has often lamented the fact that he is aging ungraciously and I feel his pain. And by pain I mean fucking stiff, loosely rolled joints. Why must we live on ointo the eighties when we’re propped up with blood thinners and Adderall AND SHIT? Question mark. Shffling around on walkers and Johnny Walker Red. Yeah I;m drunk and my spell check is lighting up like the fuxcking Geiger counter at Chernobly/ Fuck Chernobyl!
I think Obamma had it roght with his death panmels and soylent green and shit. I now official;ly swoitch my affiliation to the Green Party.
Selah
.
21
oh right we don’t do that anymore.
.
fuck you all
What else ya gonna
Do if those other Jews got
Portandia show?
What the fuck is my
Mulatress Leah’s daughter
Doing with this fey?
Mr. Adidas Foot
Ready to Kung-Fu kick both
Twats with roundhouse.
He only wears stripes
Since the gyroscope was put
In her Zebra Hole.
I puts the baquette
In the basket, or it gets
The hose. The Mime Hose.
If horizontal
Stripes make you look thin. This
Cock Fan must be dead.
What’s black and white and
Red all over? The brown chick and
I rolling in menses.
Unfortunately,
They are only staff left alive
At Charlie Hebdo.
Back in Olden Days
Curly, Moe and Larry Stooge
Wore this as swimsuits
Leftover fabric
Referee garb maker gives
To designer school
Plays dress up tonight:
Effeminate elfin queer
Gondola jockey
Plays dress up tonight:
Zebra Exhibit Men’s Room
Glory Hole Whobag
These two inspired
Oakland A’s catcher Steve Vogt
To join them at club
Mixed-breed siblings share
their love of broad stripped attire
and trouser sausage
No joke- HCwDB legend was sited on tv last night, first row under the Cavs basket – that Asian dude that sells jewelry to all the rappers- I forget what we called him, but he always had braces on and huge Mr-T style chains on his neck. He’s still got the chains.
.
It was such a bizarro moment for me to see real life legend still doing all the same shit we were mocking about 8 years ago. Crazy. It was about the 9min mark of the 4th quarter, you can see him getting amped up about whatever play had just transpired.
Blue Beanie is proof
to Bible Belt morons of
descent from monkeys.
Mon amour, zap my
plump, clamped nipples from your car
battery handbag.
These two are proof that
anal causes pregnancy
please don’t reproduce
Anal birth left his
noggin shaped like a big turd
still plays in toilet
After seeing this
I couldn’t get a renoB
Sniffing Cialis
Pepé le Homo
Finds a Muse in this Fag Hag
Helps him move bowels
Does having striped clothes
Make you Effeminate Douche?
Asking for a friend…
These Mulatto dames
Usually have better
taste. Taste better, too
Rusty Griswald has
This beret in red but he’s
Not a flaming Gay
I’d smack this guy with
A bag of nickels and then
Drink some Chianti
Sinatra once banged
Mulatto. Shared with Sammy
Wouldn’t with this guy
West Village Eye of
Anal chills souls of straight men
Gets this guy more Bung
Oversized ears make
for great handles as FeyBag
demonstrates suck skills.
Limp wristed Pierre
Smokes his fag with aplomb. Smokes
Big cock with a bib
Mangez votre merde ?
Cette chose hétéro pourrait ne pas
Etre mauvais après tout.
Pepe le Jew macks
On Mullatto brown kitten.
I stink like piss, no.
These un-hip hipsters
For sure not at Jeff Chaz show
Jeff”s from San Berdu
That was supposed to
Highlight some Jeff Chazand shit
Fuck HTML
Any of you cats
Remember THIS screaming tune?
Badass Gary Moore
It’s now “BLUES FRIDAY”
Executive decision
Get some BLUES mo’fos
.
.
Fuccen Rocco
Let minorities
Have a say, here’s a LEFTY
Coco Montoya
Yes this is about
Losing the great BB King
Rock and Roll Heaven
Joe’s guitar solos
Can cure cancer in kittens
Make you shake your head
Frank’s guitar solos
Could melt your fuccen face off
Cure your asthma, too
Frank weighs in again
Douchebag gets his come uppance
Smells like Vaseline
Don’t forget the gals
Beth Hart could kick all our butts
Then strap-on peg you
His sun-blanched penis
sallow and ineffective
perks up to show tunes
Optimistic read:
Pouty hipster dead pans here;
Normally just gay.
.
That is about all
The optimism I can
muster on this pic
Mulattino gal
Bends those stripes in a nice way;
Femboy douche doesn’t.
This guy’s a famous
Interior designer
He pushes in stools
That’s Marcel Mar-faux
The world’s most bitter French mime
He likes the oui oui
For 50 years I thought
B.B. King was a BBQ
Joint owned by Lucille.
Just so all you poo pirates know, it’s Victoria Day weekend up here and we all put away the skis, watch the igloo melt, and dance stoned around the fire. We celebrate the little things like the beginning of the end of the summer for three days.
.
Family parties celebrate the Vitamin D (respect) we need for the annual reversing of the scurvy as it burns our Viking skins. Except for the Mediterraneans and Pescatarian, the Jews and the Coons, and the Moslems, and the Chinks and the Injuns, and Eskimos etc., we are all shrivelled pale husks of who we whence were.
.
Folklore tells of a time when the weekend before, and including the third Monday of January; that the revelry was stoic, or reserved, as were the times after her death.
As of late, the global warming has caused a drastic increase the length and severity of the winter, as well as the concurrent record snowfalls and bitching skiing in Vermont the brave.
.
We get really fucking stoned, start to store the lawnmower, grill some shit and get stoned with the bugs, then pretend to enjoy ourselves tubing in the frozen St. Lawrence River. But shit, I’m stuck here so I’m wasted and drunk again. She was a great one the sweet old doll. But I’ll never figure out why we have a holiday about obsolescent police cruisers.
I meant May. And Crown Victoria Day.
I wrote a little speech about his long weekend. Proud to be a living human, free from alien attack. Proud of my country and all the great countries of the world. And riunka s fuck like Mr. Leahy and my mom the slut.
.
..
…
….
Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. “Mankind.” That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can’t be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it’s fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom… Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution… but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice:
“We will not go quietly into the night!” We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!” Sons, Ans shit. Sons’
That was for D-Day and Vitamin D-Day. Shit.
I am among the eldest of statesmen of the few remaining holdouts who haunt these hallowed halls, once prosperous and shit. The right reverend Chad Kroeger has often lamented the fact that he is aging ungraciously and I feel his pain. And by pain I mean fucking stiff, loosely rolled joints. Why must we live on ointo the eighties when we’re propped up with blood thinners and Adderall AND SHIT? Question mark. Shffling around on walkers and Johnny Walker Red. Yeah I;m drunk and my spell check is lighting up like the fuxcking Geiger counter at Chernobly/ Fuck Chernobyl!
I think Obamma had it roght with his death panmels and soylent green and shit. I now official;ly swoitch my affiliation to the Green Party.
Selah
.
21
oh right we don’t do that anymore.
.
fuck you all
Now that I’ve sobered some I can speak with more coherence and fluidity and shit. And by sobered I mean I took a shower and switched to Jim Beam Nd shit. Remember when Cher was a gypsy woman with long black haoir and a pronounced bone structure? Now she’s an ancient octinegerion with flabby tits like beef jerky and a face like a vaccum cleaner. Time marches on. I mention this only because I had to haul my old man to the hospital and shit now he can’t drive. I can’t convince them inbto a nursing honme so my mom has to ddrive him around cause he can only see shapes. Mom hasn’t driven in two years and can’t turn her head more than twelve degrees celcius, so if you see an old, blue Ford escape coming down the road get the fuck out the way, sons…….escape
But it’s all good. I’m told I shouldn’t text while drunk but I;m not driving. Darksock has issues of the neck and I feel his pAIN ALSO. mY entire vertebrae has been compromised. Keep hitting cap locks so I’ll sign off.
.
15
Medicare is Satan hiding ‘neath a box of dish soap. Bernie sanders save us all.
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29
Amongst this trio
the only one hetero
is the tennis shoe
What’s worse aging and not looking old and not feeling old and then dropping dead because dead is dead? Or decaying over time like a banana, a banana that shits himself and then just dies?
.
16
I’ll take that first option, which is just about where I’m at now.
Maybe I should take the second option considering I just shit myself.
Lenny the Box is so named for his habit of carrying a box every working morning to my awaiting Mystery Machine. The only mystery is how the Machine (2004 Venture van) keeps rolling like new with nary a few thousand a year in upgrades.
.
The box refers to an average sized box with toilet paper, kitchen catchers, and baby wipes. The reason for the box is the time when I tried to heave my loose stools by the side of the van in an emergency. I splashed Lenny with a horizontal shit spray of Malthusian scope and he has been forever disabled from the stench.
.
Now I can fit my thin buttocks into said box with a vacuum effect so the spray is contained to my own nethers and hence the reason for the travelling baby wipes and air freshener.
.
21
This is the exact reason that the heathens hate you.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=faRE7ccUfwM
.
6
My late Aunt Rosalie, God rest her soul, was built like Evander Holyfield present day.
That Letterman was
A stalwart since Johnny quit.
Did cool things like this.
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAlbmZ6qfFk
.
Eat my cock Jimmies!
Mulattino gal
Bends those stripes in a nice way;
Femboy douche doesn’t.